N/C. Sorry for length but wanted to get this out somewhere. Too embarassed to tell anyone in RL.
I got totally addicted to readings last year. I was seriously depressed after the death of my best friend and got completely love bombed by what I thought was a friend who was a lot younger than me.
He was in what he said was a controlling relationship so I kept him at arms length but was having these readings which were telling me he was my soulmate and I felt such a strong connection with him and if i'm honest, I desperately wanted that to be true.
This reader picked up so many specifics and predicted so many things that did happen that I was blown away. Loads of things came true.Told me this guy would leave his GF and get a flat with a B in the name of the road which happened and he took me there to see it and it was very 'bare bones' but now he was single we got into a relationship.
The readers accuracy also meant I ignored tonnes of red flags but as the reader often had predicted these events which I didn't believe at the time (such as seeing him shouting at me which I didn't believe would happen, then coming back to apologise and breaking down) but he saw a happy relationship in the end, I ignored them and I ignored early signs of abuse. I had been so lonely, isolated and bereaved and it felt like this guy was the only positive in my life so I turned a blind eye to a lot as had been warned by the reader it wouldn't be easy but would ultimately work out.
One night he came round drunk (a red flag i'd been ignoring) and kept calling me by another womans name, not even his ex-GFs. I obviously asked about her and suspected he was cheating and told him as such. He said it was someone from work he'd had to talk about a lot that day and as he was drunk, it slipped out. When I called the reader he said 'a A name? which it was, and he said 'thats just someone from work, nothing happening between them' so I apologised to the guy. Reader also said the guy would have another verbal outburst but was just pushing me away due to his abusive childhood (true but not mentioned by me).
So a few days before Christmas there was another outburst, quite a vile one with then lots of abusive texts. I was replying that his behaviour was unacceptable but he was pushing me away and I loved him bla bla bla.
Then he ended up telling me he had been sleeping with A and she is pregnant and that's who he is really in love with. Had also never left his partner, the flat was a friends. I didn't believe it and the reader said it wasn't true.
I then had it confirmed and stupidly sent some texts to the guy saying how heartbroken I was. This triggered a couple of days of lovely stuff such as me being a desperate old bag who'd been kidding myself to believe he'd be in love with me. I was a cunt, he had to force himself to have sex with me because I was so old. I was pathetic, sick, a head fuck, stupid and on and on. Ended with some threats to physically harm me if I didn't stop 'messing with his head trying to say he led me on when I was thick to have ever believed he wanted me'. I was suicidal on Xmas eve alone in my flat, knowing he was with his GF and also had a baby on the way with someone else. Something that won't happen for me at my age now. I felt exactly like what he'd said, a desperate old bag who'd been deluding myself. I've never felt so low plus was sitting in the dark as was scared he'd come round to hurt me or just to tell me more about what a sad, old embarassment I am. Plus sick at the thought I believed i'd finally found love and no, another lonely Christmas with even the nice memories of him and the feeling of being in love for a few months taken away as it had all been bullshit lies.
Went back to the reader to ask just HOW I could have been so wrong about this guy and how 'spirit' or 'my guides' or whatever could have been so wrong? He persisted in the soulmate story, says he doesn't love either of the other women and will want to apologise and get back with me. That's very possible as it's what abusive men do, but that would be really dangerous advice to give to someone because i'll ignore him or tell him no but another woman may not, believing in the happy ending and ending up in a seriously abusive relationship.
I'm SO embarassed. Both for paying this guy to tell me what was mostly nonsense and for ignoring all my own instincts about this guy.