Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Having a baby who sleeps through noise is just luck

170 replies

Hustssleeping · 02/01/2020 23:59

My friends new baby will only sleep in perfect silence. Which means a family tiptoeing around with white noise on when they want to whisper. It seems crazy but I remember doing the same with my first.
Is it just luck if your baby sleeps through any noise or is there a trick to it? She desperately wants to know as her DSS comes EOW and she feels bad asking him to be quiet- she knows its important it's his house too..
So
IABU there is a way of teaching babies to sleep through noise (if so- share the magic please!)
IANBU- it's just luck

OP posts:
MiniGuinness · 03/01/2020 07:25

It absolutely is not luck. I went to a friends house before I had children and we weren't allowed inside because the child was napping. I was determined that my children would never impact my life in this way, how ridiculous. I carried on as normal whenever mine slept and it paid off because they slept through anything.

MRex · 03/01/2020 07:27

Initially he could sleep through all sorts of sounds, we used to watch films while he slept happily beside us as well as living our normal lives. Then he got to 4 months old and woke up at every single little noise, if anything he got worse at 6 months. An over-tired baby is sad, we can't have that, so we had to learn to work around him. Then by the time he got to 12 months old he could sleep through some types of noise, but not anything piercing such as the doorbell / drilling / the sound of mummy going up to bed. We try to make slightly more noise during naps, but it doesn't seem to make any difference as he's still disturbed by piercing types of noise. I've no idea where he'll end up, but I do think telling people to just make noise isn't helpful when all the babies haven't been given the same rulebook. I vote luck.

NoParticularPattern · 03/01/2020 07:29

It’s absolute luck. My friend has identical twins who are so different it’s not even funny. One has slept through from weeks old and the other is an utter sleep thief who wakes at the first opportunity. Mine are both pains in my arse and I’ve never kept quiet round them at all.

MiniGuinness · 03/01/2020 07:29

I should also add that apart from this incredibly neurotic friend I have never known any children to wake at normal living sounds, so I really don't think it is luck.

MonteStory · 03/01/2020 07:33

Apart from all the examples given on this thread?

Does it occur to you that she was neurotic because her child was a very light sleeper, not the other way round?

HowDoIhelp321 · 03/01/2020 07:36

In my experience with my three a baby can sleep to a marching band. BUT you stop that noise and they are instantly awake.

A baby can fall asleep to silence. But break that silence and the baby will wake up.

The key (again just my experience can't speak for others) is keeping the noise or lack there of consistent.

It's the change that's the problem.

NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 03/01/2020 07:36

My younger can sleep through background noise, Hoover, shower, hair dryer in another room etc, but is sensitive to a raised voice. Dc2 in particular wakes if she hears DC1 shouting, she has got epic fomo where he is concerned. DC1 was slightly more able to ignore voices but was much more prone to wake up for noise generally. The doorbell for some reason always woke him, i eventually started to turn it off for naps!

I tried everything with him to make him sleep through noise, it made absolutely no difference. He's the better sleeper, he slept through the night at 16w 7 til 6am, but he needs peace to sleep. I do.

IvinghoeBeacon · 03/01/2020 07:37

Yeah MiniGuinness most people on this thread must be lying

NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 03/01/2020 07:37

Howdoihelp
I think that is often true to an extent

toomuchtooold · 03/01/2020 07:38

Luck. I had twins. DD1 could sleep literally anywhere. DD2 needed white noise and pitch darkness - she could sleep fitfully in the buggy if it was moving but for 45mins vs 2h in the cot. At nursery she never slept more than half an hour - they were amazed to hear how heavily she slept at home. I got a load of grief from friends and family who didn't think it was important that we got back to the house for the afternoon nap. I don't regret a bloody thing. Oh you're absolutely right Janet, I'm really letting my PFB anxiety take over my life here because I prefer eating my lunch in peace while the kids sleep for 2 solid hours to wrestling the two of them in your front room while trying to drink a cup of rapidly cooling tea.

JellyBabiesSaveLives · 03/01/2020 07:38

Just luck. 2nd and 3rd babies both started life in NICU with all the noise, both have older sibling making noise. 2nd woke (extremely grumpily) at any sound and 3rd sleeps through anything.

1st baby also woke if you breathed. And I tried the “normal noise” thing.

3rd baby was a bit of a revelation, sleep wise. He actually seemed to like it. If I’d had him first I’d have been soooo smug.

IvinghoeBeacon · 03/01/2020 07:40

It must be really hard having twins with opposite sleeping requirements - slightly easier if one is easygoing I am sure, but if one required the cot and the other a moving buggy what a nightmare that would be

Damntheman · 03/01/2020 07:40

I think it's a bit of both.. They do get used to noise (eventually), although there's always the exception to the rule who will cheerfully no sleep soldier you until you break isn't there.

I have one who will sleep through the fire alarm (concerning..), and another who would wake if a mouse sneezed four blocks away. I stopped flushing the loo after her bed time for a year or so when she was really small.. but happily she's much improved now at three and I no longer need to excessively bleach the loo ridiculously often to get rid of the staining that caused!

So.. luck yes, but tip toeing around a baby is also not great. Best of luck to your friend, I hope her baby chills and starts to sleep deeper soon! Has she considered getting baby to nap outside in the pram? If she's even got a safely enclosed space for that, that is, might save the day time tip toeing at least.

IvinghoeBeacon · 03/01/2020 07:41

I have to say that the accounts from parents of twins are fairly convincing - it’s not like you would try to get one to sleep in a different environment to another out of choice

IvinghoeBeacon · 03/01/2020 07:43

The smoke alarm thing is very common
www.bbc.co.uk/news/49648867

HowDoIhelp321 · 03/01/2020 07:46

I can believe that! Mine have always been unbothered by smoke alarms, yet all of them are crap sleepers.

I agree that the twin thing cements that it's luck.
But I knew that anyway unlike something of the smug parents of sleeping babies on here

NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 03/01/2020 07:49

Mini Guinness by 18m mine slept like the dead and didn't wake, it was between 6m and a year he was worst for waking or simply not falling to sleep in noise

HowDoIhelp321 · 03/01/2020 07:53

I love that MiniGuiness experience of one friend tells her that every baby can sleep through noise and it's down the neurotic parents. 😂😂😂😂

Sipperskipper · 03/01/2020 07:55

I think it’s luck. I was so keen for DD to be able to sleep through anything. We had all sorts of noise going on, had her out & about in the pram etc, but she just didn’t settle and ended up overtired and grumpy.

Realised the best way to get her to sleep was swaddled, in a dark room, with white noise! A bit restrictive but she ended up being a fantastic sleeper.

IvinghoeBeacon · 03/01/2020 08:01

I’m sure with some babies as well there is the luck of whatever stage of the sleep cycle they are in when the noise occurs - as with adults too I expect - so a noise that wakes them at a particular time might not have done 15 minutes earlier

Skyejuly · 03/01/2020 08:02

All 4 of mine sleep through anything but you dont have a choice in this house as they are like elephants!

MiniGuinness · 03/01/2020 08:06

Yes HowDoIhelp321 that was the only person I have ever met who tiptoed around their child. All the other parents I have met since having my first (20 years) haven't. So I think my experience does say something! 😂 (Maybe read next time? 😂)

hazeyjane · 03/01/2020 08:11

Dd1 - very light sleeper, tried the whole 'carry on making noise regardless'...she would just join in with the noise by screaming like a banshee. Ironically needed to have a low noise playing to get to sleep. Now at 13 still finds getting to sleep hard - and can't sleep unless she has an audio book playing.

Dd2 - could sleep anywhere, and you could periodically blast an air horn at her and she would just mutter and carry on sleeping

Ds - has complex needs (including a sleep disorder and sensory issues). Sleep is for losers, certain sounds cause extreme upset (whether awake or not) and we have been known to sit with our hands clasped over his ears to try to get him to calm down and sleep.

It's luck.

IvinghoeBeacon · 03/01/2020 08:13

No you misunderstand miniguinness - you may only have encountered this with one baby in real life, but what you are telling people who have babies who require silence despite their best efforts to maintain normal levels of noise is that you think they are lying. Which is quite an unpleasant thing to imply

NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 03/01/2020 08:16

Mini Guinness good for you with your nicely sleeping kids. My friend had 3 like that and was very smug. Number 4 threw her, she was rather apologetic after her Grin

Swipe left for the next trending thread