How do I survive MIL’s hellish visit?

[spontaneouscombustionawaits]

Help me get through this week. Please. I’m begging you. My MIL is staying with us. I have a week left. I’m broken. She is the most despicable woman. Truly. Madly. Deeply. Awful. I don’t want to go into details. Just want some sisterly support and tips on how to get through it without going on a brutal murderous spree. Or spontaneously combusting. Though the latter would end my misery so not the worst outcome.

Invent appointments/arrange to meet friends. Your DC doesn't have to lie - you can just say - or x hasn't turned up let's have lunch.

Say that swimming is important and go with the DC.

A friend needs help urgently...and go and stay with them!

You need 'husbandly' support not 'sisterly'!!
Don't agree to having her for so long in future. A week is more that enough.

She can't refuse to be separated from your children. Find your backbone and go out.

I assume your Dh is working - how convenient for him to have his mother to stay while he's not around. Organise play dates with anyone and then just tell her you have to meet dc friend so you'll be back in an hour - don't get back til Dh is due home. Sod her, you shouldn't be left entertaining her at all. Is she from another country? If not tell Dh you've had enough and he needs to tell her it's time for her to go home.

Go out, arrange an urgent playdate at a friends and tell mil friend needs a shoulder to cry so not really appropriate for her to go. Then take dc to cinema straight from friends house. You could use this set up daily, claiming friend really needs your support.

You need pen and paper. Plan out your new patio.
Make a big cross where the body will go.
Let us know when you need an alibi for...
*lighthearted before I am accused of leading the op astray...
I have been nc with mil for 5 years today!
!!

Why is she there for three weeks?

Where is your DH?

Let me guess, she's from overseas, hence the long visit.

She's from a culture where the MIL has all the power, what she says goes.

Your DH sees no problem and is at work, leaving you to do all the heavy lifting?

I appreciate why you don't want to go into details. But with annoying people I find the agreeing technique to be useful, they say,,,, "you are stupid aren't you" so I say,,," yes I really am, and I am lazy too. You missed that out, not so clever now eh" then I do a happy dance and they look confused.

After school worry, you certainly described my situation well, but luckily DH wasn't at work

Wake up and go out with your DC before she gets up.

Leave a note and say you had a pre arranged event.

Interesting post re MIL having the power due to her culture.
I have experienced this generational power thing (to a lesser extent) with aunts in Ireland.
I take great pleasure in overruling them, although I know it's very different when it's your own DM or MIL.

How is dc managing with a velcro dgm?

Go out with your children. Make it clear to her that you need some alone time with them. Your house, your family, your rules. Even if other cultural norms are involved, she has had your continuous company for 2 weeks. Enough is enough.

Then tomorrow, all of you go to the cinema for a treat - you get a couple of hours not having to talk to her.

Why is she staying so long? Even the most angelic MIL would get on people’s nerves after such a long time!

Where’s your H in all of this?

I’d have to invent some very urgent appointments that you/DC can only go to together. You have my sympathies. My murderous rage inducing SIL tried to foist herself on us today. I’ve come over all busy and sociable all of a sudden. Not down with someone who openly dislikes me sitting round my house letting her child maul mine and saying nothing then scoring when I dare to. Nope. Not a thing.

If I had to twiddle my thumbs in the local McDonalds all day I would. Or carve my eyes out with rusty spoons.

Ugh 3 weeks - I would've killed mine by now. She stayed for one night in December and I was climbing the walls.

Get yourself some me-time - gym, coffee, whatever you enjoy. Leave your husband to it with the kids and her.

Scowling. Not scoring. Although she does also like to keep score. Not sure what of, only she seems to know or care about the the rules, but she’s winning anyway so she would. Apparently.

I genuinely wonder why some MILs seem totally oblivious to these situations? I am not a MIL, although of the age where many of my friends are. Surely you would not be so blinded by love for your DS and DGC that you still couldn’t sense when you are not welcome & feel uncomfortable? I truly don’t get it.

seriously take her to a garden centre -it will distract all of you &break up the intensity - & you can have a nice cup of coffee & contemplate all the poisonous or thorny plants -

I second gin. Get her drunk too so she falls asleep.

Why has she got so much control? It’s ridiculous.

Take yourself and the child out for a few hours.

3 weeks so far!!!!!

WTF????

Is there a leave date or is this an ongoing hell on earth??

@AfterSchoolWorry Correct, correct and correct, but he is not working. It doesn’t matter though. Her presence is enough to make me want to lose my lunch.

@Egghead68 Can’t afford that amount of alcohol. She’s a booze hound so drinking just gives her energy.