To think a lot of parents of very young children become quite selfish

[allthewaythere]

I am expecting to be flamed but here goes.

Yesterday I was walking on a really narrow street and a couple were walking with a very young baby who’s only just started to take a few hesitant steps, maybe 11 months, so he had dad on one side and mum on the other.

Because the street was so narrow it meant everyone behind them either had to walk at toddler pace or step into the road to get by.

I’ve seen this in a lot of my friends with really young children. Is this a thing and does it pass?

Anyone going slow for any reason, should be aware that they may be holding others up, it is about being thoughtful of others. Whether that be in a car, on a mobility scooter, or walking. Even the elderly has the good manners to realise they are walking slow, and either apologize or endeavour to allow you to pass. That said fast people realize that parents go googly-eyed and totally unaware when they have an addition to the family, so the word "excuse me" is used in such circumstances. Moving into the road could cause a major collision killing all those on the footpath, plus cars on the road, and therefore not an option.

I have small children so have probably behaved like this but I do notice it with others a lot as well. I think you are so in awe of your little child, particularly if it is your first, you are very single minded and focus so much on the child so can behave rudely and inconsiderately. You also think your child is the sweetest thing ever so can't believe anyone would find them annoying or in the way. I have noticed this in friends with small children who before would have been the first ones to criticise someone else for behaving like this.

Oh dear. Another one for whom the point is a speck in the sky above their heads

Hardly. Just disagreed with you, that's all.

Yabu.
All sorts of people take up narrows streets. Old people walking with their granny trollies, young families stuffing their faces with cakes, people that are chatting and oblivious to the world around them. The kid has to learn to walk at some point and I'm sure opening your mouth to say excuse me really isn't that hard.

You’ve kind of proved my point there nurse!

YANBU! At an event in the summer a mother and grandmother had two toddlers pushing right in front of my kids after we’d sat for ages to get a good spot to view something.

I was getting more and more frustrated as time went on. There was plenty of room and I’d even made a space for the little girl but they insisted on pushing in right in front of my two

Hardly. Just disagreed with you, that's all.

Since I was not complaining that the toddler should have walked faster, you were disagreeing with an imaginery point.

Out of curiosity I was recently walking with a pram and an old person using a zimmer frame was walking at snails pace in front of me. I made the decision to wait behind them when they did not respond to excuse me, rather than walk in the road. They knew I was there.
Would this make them selfish or do we all need to chill out? Took me a few minutes to overtake them. I could have said excuse me again but wasn't in a rush.

Personally I think it was just an old woman focussing on taking one step in front of the other whilst I was perfectly capable of waiting.

Zimmer frames and disabilities are different to peaks. Hasn’t this conversation been done to death on here?

Someone with a disability taking up the pavement cannot help that. It might be briefly inconvenient for me: more so for them.

Someone with a baby isn’t in the situation of having no-other-option than to walk three abreast.

I agree wholeheartedly with a pp - it's absolutely the usual offensive and scathingly rude comments about parents of young kids, in order to point out their rudeness for moving too slowly/talking too loudly/exclaiming at their DC/whatever.

Ironic.

I’m confused. Was there something wrong with your voice which didn’t permit you to say “excuse me” like most people would?

I must say, I think it's pretty disgusting that on a parenting forum, so many people refer to other people's children as "brats" after only seeing snapshot of these kids' lives

Can I just add men standing around pointlessly blocking the aisles inTesco while their wives shop, to the list.

FFS go and sit in the car or browse the newspapers but get out of the way. Some of us are actually trying to get things done.

At least toddlers don’t get in the way for 30 years

Neck, I’m sure many don’t. I’ve had young children myself and it’s entirely possible that I was the same, so wrapped up in what they were doing I didn’t notice the world around me.

But I’m not going to not make a thread on mn because you don’t like it.

YANBU to question whether it was necessary to walk the toddler down a narrow street at what sounds like a peak foot-traffic time, but to then generalise that all parents of small children are selfish because of what is (let’s face it) a minor inconvenience in your own day is a bit much.

As many a level headed PP have said, there are selfish people, oblivious people, rude people etc. Some of them just happen to be parents.

Since I was not complaining that the toddler should have walked faster, you were disagreeing with an imaginery point

You said Every time it was a parent and their toddler walking at a snail's pace

You see how one might arrive at the conclusion that you thought they should move faster?

But you didn't mean that. Cool. Happy to move on...

Do you need a diagram Tink?

I was very far back in the street. The slowness the baby was walking at meant a really big crowd of people had built up behind said family.

Even if I’d been right behind them and said excuse me I don’t think it would have made a difference. They would have had to pick their child up to have let me get by on the pavement. People had to go in the road to get by and since it was dark and lots of cars and cycles not ideal really.

But I’m not going to not make a thread on mn because you don’t like it

Eh? You make any threads you want.

I’m not really navi, it’s something I’ve noticed for a while and this is a concrete example. I think a lot of parents focus so much on their child they don’t notice the world around them and as I agreed earlier selfish is probably harsh for that. Self absorbed probably.

Great neck so stop whining about how much you don’t like it then

Great neck so stop whining about how much you don’t like it then

'Whining'? This IS AIBU...you know that this is exactly how it works? People disagree with you and have a different opinion?

There’s a difference between ‘YABU and this is why’ and ‘YABU and what a nasty thread, I don’t like this thread, this thread will make people feel bad.’

YES this happens and It drives me crazy

Christmas shopping in a rammed supermarket and Mr and Mrs ‘only people to have a baby ever’ are letting tiny toddler (wobbly baby steps), ‘help’ them push the trolley.

One of the million other shoppers comes around the corner, trollies nudge, toddler goes flying hits head on metal trolley. Que mum and baby both having a melt down in the middle of supermarket whilst dad angrily has a go at other shopper (elderly man).

I waddled my pregnant bum past and pointed out how irresponsible it was to let their baby do that and they’d caused his injury themselves- wasn’t fair them blaming the other chap as was not his fault.

They abandoned the trolley and walked off.

It’s ok to be absorbed with your child but don’t do stupid stuff/inflict that on everyone else.

There’s a difference between ‘YABU and this is why’ and ‘YABU and what a nasty thread, I don’t like this thread, this thread will make people feel bad

Eh? (again). I literally don't know what you're on about. I haven't said any of that.

You see how one might arrive at the conclusion that you thought they should move faster?

You neck, just you. Anyone else might realise this thread is about the parents (see the thread title?) and not expect a child who cannot walk faster, to achieve the impossible and walk faster.