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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think a lot of parents of very young children become quite selfish

608 replies

allthewaythere · 31/12/2019 10:07

I am expecting to be flamed but here goes.

Yesterday I was walking on a really narrow street and a couple were walking with a very young baby who’s only just started to take a few hesitant steps, maybe 11 months, so he had dad on one side and mum on the other.

Because the street was so narrow it meant everyone behind them either had to walk at toddler pace or step into the road to get by.

I’ve seen this in a lot of my friends with really young children. Is this a thing and does it pass?

OP posts:
NeckPainChairSearch · 31/12/2019 14:37

You've got loads of like-minded folks cheering you on, OP. Go you!

You surely can cope with the odd dissenter with a different POV?

NeckPainChairSearch · 31/12/2019 14:38

Devereax I moved on. You should try it.

Devereux1 · 31/12/2019 14:39
Original poster
allthewaythere · 31/12/2019 14:41

Hide the thread, move on Neck

Life is too short, it really is. Happy new year.

OP posts:
BrusselPout · 31/12/2019 14:43

@mammylamb not disputing that, but those parents lacked any shred common sense -unfortunately there are impatient idiots both in cars, impatient pedestrians also on the crossing and cyclists that often believe that crossings don't apply to them. They put their child in potential danger

NeckPainChairSearch · 31/12/2019 14:43

Devereaux Are you Donald Trump? Someone disagrees with you so you fire off insults?

Nothing happened fgs.

Original poster
allthewaythere · 31/12/2019 14:43

Jesus Christ Donald trump Grin

OP posts:
NeckPainChairSearch · 31/12/2019 14:45

Hide the thread, move on Neck

Is that everyone who doesn't agree with you? I'm just fine where I am, thanks. Grin

Life is too short, it really is Yes. That was my very point. It's too short to be mean about well-meaning parents and their kids.

Happy New Year! Grin

Devereux1 · 31/12/2019 14:45

Devereaux Are you Donald Trump? Someone disagrees with you so you fire off insults?

Oh dear. Grin

RunningAroundAgain · 31/12/2019 14:46

Lots of people are selfish. Some are parents, some aren't. Don't think there's any direct correlation

funinthesun19 · 31/12/2019 14:46

What’s wrong with saying “Excuse me”?

Loads of people get in the way, not just people with young children. And people with young children I have FAR more patience for.

YABU and sound like you have a chip on your shoulder.

Original poster
allthewaythere · 31/12/2019 14:47

No neck you can disagree all you want. What I’m trying to say is that you seem to object to the premise of the thread itself which is different to thinking someone is being unreasonable.

But since we are obviously happily posting tell me where I’ve been mean.

OP posts:
Original poster
allthewaythere · 31/12/2019 14:48

Already answered fun I was a long long long way back in the build up of people who were behind the family.

OP posts:
thepeopleversuswork · 31/12/2019 14:48

Newsflash: people become very absorbed with their small children. Teenagers can be spoiled and moody. This is hardly surprising.

NeckPainChairSearch · 31/12/2019 14:53

No neck you can disagree all you want. Oh thanks Grin

What I’m trying to say is that you seem to object to the premise of the thread itself which is different to thinking someone is being unreasonable

No. I have never said that.

But since we are obviously happily posting tell me where I’ve been mean

And I haven't said that either. I said that life is too short to be mean about well-meaning parents and their kids. It wasn't aimed at you. It is a wider comment on the thread and the comments it has attracted.

That's it. I don't ever name-call or insult posters. Neither has a place on forum threads, in my view.

Original poster
allthewaythere · 31/12/2019 14:54

Well we agree on something then Smile

OP posts:
Bringonspring · 31/12/2019 14:56

I think muggers and burglars are selfish. I’m not sure I would say the same about parents supporting their child whilst they learn to walk.

Crikey, so much hatred in society

NaviSprite · 31/12/2019 14:59

I must’ve missed that amendment earlier OP apologies Smile

I think all people are self absorbed to a degree but I do agree that it’s very easy for parents to get lost in their own bubble when they have young children.

My DC are two but late developers, have just started taking real steps and practicing walking, I have never thought of taking them onto a busy street to do it though! So in your example I will say YANBU.

JKScot4 · 31/12/2019 15:00

@Nursejackie1
Also the baby wanting to walk on a narrow street might not want to be picked up. Why should your want to speed on by outweigh the baby’s? He or she feeling really proud to be walking along not understanding why their parents suddenly sweep them up or shove them in a pushchair because you happen to be more important?
Christ on a fuckin bike!! Now we see how entitled rude people are created.
A baby’s wants? You sound deluded, baby has to press the button on the cash point to avoid a tantrum? How about you teach your child the world doesn’t revolve round them getting what they want ??

WhenYouCantRunYouCrawl · 31/12/2019 15:04

Yesterday. Busy tourist village. Pavement just about wide enough for two people to pass. Me walking behind 3 year old DD holding onto her hood and keeping her in a straight line so there was room for people to pass us.

The amount of people coming the other way two abreast and refusing to step aside so DD and had to step onto the road was astounding. All ages and demographics.

It's not young parents that are selfish. There are twats everywhere.

Singletomingle · 31/12/2019 15:10

Maybe all those complainers could get horns so those of us who aren't as important know to dive into the road well in advance. Perhaps we can all bow as they go past too!

onceandneveragain · 31/12/2019 15:14

I agree, but think it depends more on the people. If they are already selfish, having young children seems to multiply it, whereas otherwise nice people sometimes have to put kids first, which is fair enough.

For example, I organised a catch up over Christmas for a group of friends, two of which have young children.
When organising it couple A: said straightaway not to plan it around them, they didn't think they'd be able to get childcare so couldn't both come, but one of them would try to. Fine. Added a possible plus one to the restaurant booking
Couple B: specified both the date and place that would be most convenient for them. I organised the booking around this (taking into account other people's preferences too).

Came to the date and neither could make it due to child's illnesses. Fair enough re: couple A, they'd said upfront only one of them would be able to come anyway and it didn't put anyone else out. Couple B though meant we were now three places down, at a place and time they specified which was actually less convenient for a few of us but and they weren't even there! It's also not the first time they've done it, last time they didn't even bother to let us know they weren't coming so that we waited an hour trying to ring them before we ordered.

Lesson learnt, will either not invite them at all in the future, or just arrange it at a time that's best for everyone else and tough luck if it's no good for them!

makingmammaries · 31/12/2019 15:16

I think supermarket aisle rage is much more of a thing. Couples who faff around taking up the entire width of the aisle while one holds the trolley sideways on and the other dreamily browses the shelves, aaargh. Give me small children any way.

bingbangbing · 31/12/2019 15:18

@JKscot

"How about you teach your child the world doesn’t revolve round them getting what they want ??"

Because it actually revolves around you, doesn't it? How dare someone someone impede your vital quest to get to Sainsbury's for even two seconds! Especially a mere child! How dare they!

GrinGrinGrin

Do you do irony?

Straycatstrut · 31/12/2019 15:23

I'm a single parent of young kids and sometimes I just can't think straight and will accidentally let go of the gate when someone is behind me instead of holding it open... I'm just rushed off my feet constantly and my brain can't keep up. I don't do it on purpose.