Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To barricade bedroom tonight?

148 replies

SulSul · 30/12/2019 21:00

DFH has been in a silent mood with me for past two days. Won’t tell me what’s up. Tonight he served up popadoms on two plates. I pointed out that the last time I did that he had a go, started an argument and said they should all be on one plate to “share”. I asked why it was different this time. He said it was “no big deal” and he “wasn’t getting into an argument about it”. Well it was a fucking big deal last time ... he made sure of it.

Anyway. I let it go.

He then let’s the dogs out. Somehow he “stubs his toe” during. This enrages him. He then makes some snide comment when he gets back in about “oh well, I’ll let your dogs ravage Each other cos I can’t be arsed now”. After telling me nothing is wrong??? Well I’ve lost it well and truly. Have screamed “what the fuck are you getting at me for?? My fucking dogs??? I’m not your verbal fucking punch bag you absolute tosser.” He’s made a quick retreat and is now playing on his stupid fucking game (the one that is helping to destroy our marriage) by himself. I’m so fucking angry. Months of frustration has poored out of me and I want a divorce. In the meantime, AIBU to take “my fucking dogs” to bed with me and barricade him out of the fucking bedroom?

OP posts:
Kungfupanda67 · 30/12/2019 21:14

No children in the house. He got rid of those earlier in the year.

??

Cluelessbeetroot · 30/12/2019 21:15

Have you/both had a drink tonight ?
Sometimes people are guilty of preaching “do as I say not as I do” (I know I am) - could this be the case with your husband ?

formerbabe · 30/12/2019 21:15

No children in the house. He got rid of those earlier in the year

Huh?

Whatsername177 · 30/12/2019 21:15

He got rid of children? Your children? Or your step children? That is more of an issue that poppudoms!

WeGoHigher · 30/12/2019 21:15

No children in the house. He got rid of those earlier in the year

What did he do? And how?

Original poster
SulSul · 30/12/2019 21:15

Yeah DH decides how things are. How you present popadoms for example. When I failed to comply last time he wanted a divorce. Tonight he presents them in the exact same way yet declares it’s no big deal. Last time only happened because I placed them a few inches left of the centre of the table ... which was thoughtless. Fuck right off. I’ve had enough of this absolute shit.

OP posts:
DustyMaiden · 30/12/2019 21:15

Maybe he want a row so he can play his game.

AnyFucker · 30/12/2019 21:16

Time to bring this shitshow to a close

What happened to the children ? Confused

speakout · 30/12/2019 21:17

Have you been drinking OP?

Original poster
SulSul · 30/12/2019 21:17

My sons both left home because of him and his fucking rules

OP posts:
Rachelfromfriends1 · 30/12/2019 21:17

How old are your sons?

Whatsername177 · 30/12/2019 21:18

Now that is something to be angry about. How old are your children?

ItsNovemberNotChristmas · 30/12/2019 21:18

Shame you put him before the kids. You sound as bad as each other

2020BetterBeBetter · 30/12/2019 21:18

In your update you day it’s emotional abuse yet it sounds like you are (at the very least) verbally abusing him. I think a divorce sounds a good idea.

Original poster
SulSul · 30/12/2019 21:18

No I’ve not been drinking, but he has. He drinks every fucking night more or less. I’m not allowed to drink on a Monday ... unless he wants to ... then it’s ok, apparently

OP posts:
BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 30/12/2019 21:19

Are they his sons too?

Cluelessbeetroot · 30/12/2019 21:19

Why would your dogs ravage each other ?

SouthernComforts · 30/12/2019 21:19

Got rid of the children??

maddiemookins16mum · 30/12/2019 21:19

It very much sounds as if you ‘started’ the first row.
Two sides to every story etc etc.

formerbabe · 30/12/2019 21:20

You should have kept your children and got rid of him.

LadyLightning · 30/12/2019 21:20

Is it possible he doesnt talk to you because you shout and swear at him? Distance between you both sounds like a good idea until you can both discuss things calmly, and if you cant do that maybe counselling? Although from what you are saying, it sounds like you may be better off separate.

1Morewineplease · 30/12/2019 21:20

Sounds like you both need a break from each other if you’ve started WW3 over poppadums.

Original poster
SulSul · 30/12/2019 21:20

How am I abusing him?? He sits there stone faced for two days making snide remarks about me, “OUR” dogs etc etc and then I finally flip when he goes too far. I’ve had enough. 7 years of this shit and I’ve had enough.

OP posts:
CokeAndCrispsAndDip · 30/12/2019 21:21

You're making each other very unhappy and your sons need to mean more in this situation. Get out OP, lifes better away from the arguments

speakout · 30/12/2019 21:22

How old are your children?