Why do thin people you’re close to feel the need to inform you that you’re a fatty?

[RebornFlame]

Especially if you’re middle class. Double especially if you’re upper middle and all your family are tiny .

I’m fat, upset and unreasonable. Please fuck off if you just want to pile on. Please give me chocolate and baileys (heaven forbid I bring the alcohol equivalent of Jeremy Kyle to my family’s big meet) if you’re another fatty navigating life with a thin, yoga and hiking obsessed family.

@1Morewineplease
That was a lovely post.

You’re still feeding a baby to sleep, so presumably have a reasonably young baby. They should be looking after you, not making you feel like crap!

Reduce the amount of time you spend with them & spend the time with people who treat you well or doing nice things for yourself /your baby.

It’s hard, but don’t allow them to define you 🌷

People are very strange about fatness, it seems to overshadow all the wonderful things they could notice instead. Like not being as much of a cunt as they are.

@ThighThighOfthigh - that is so beautifully put!

Never understood the need to shame people about their weight. Most people are perfectly aware of their size and making people feel bad about themselves is just going to make it worse in most cases. People are more likely to take care of their bodies if they are feeling more positive about it, IMO.

Just as it’s not right I get thin shamed Either..... but somehow that is more acceptable In society. In floods of tears, I’ve had people say to me I’m being silly by crying because ‘I’m thin after all’

🤔

I'm 6 months pp and losing all the baby weight hasn't been the top of my list (in the next couple months yes) my aunt how came back from Australia how I haven't seen for over two years bought me a t-shirt for chirstmas and when I opened it she said "I'm not sure what size you are and it might be bit small atm, but I'm sure it'll fit at some point! If not you can give it away" I was a bit unsure what to say I'm very aware that I still have bby weight and am a little down that I still struggle to get my old jeans on (which will change when I go to loose the weight) but for someone to mention it who I've not seen for a good couple years...

No one has ever said that to me. But l'm not mc. Get new friends? Say 'thanks Sherlock, l KNOW l could beat yo ass in a fight' and wiggle your gorgeous hips as you stride off?

Eh? I'm thin and posh. So what? I wouldn't either notice or comment on anyone else. I'd be a twat if I did so.

I’m a 8-10 now and have been for 7-8 years (currently 7 months pregnant but ya know...ignoring bump 😬) but I was a 22 in my late teens 👍🏻
Not many know this - DH and his family never saw it, neither did most of my friends who consider me ‘naturally slim’ 😂🙈

What baffles me and I Absolutely can’t get my head around Is how the ‘awfully middle class’ bubble can be so preoccupied with health/weight/fitness on the one hand but be raging alcoholics on the other but not see that as hypocritical.

The circles DH and I are in are very much the ‘will drink a bottle of expensive wine each and spend all night eating foreign cheeses but brunch on broccoli smoothies and obsess about obscure fitness based sports/hobbies’

I honestly don’t understand how anyone can be so extreme in separate ways and consider it normal 🤔
I don’t understand how or why alcoholism because a ‘glamorous lifestyle choice’ but overeating is ‘gross and frowned upon’ surely they’re very similar.

I am a thin person who would not dream of commenting on anyone's weight, relative or not. It is possible to support the OP without thoughtless generalisations about thin people.

Again, THIS! Flip it around OP. My sister tells people 'sadeyed's only skinny because she exists on coffee and cigarettes' This isn't true, but it fucking hurts me.

And now go and eat the arse out of some chocolate and pour some Baileys down your neck. Get a defiant tilt to your chin and say 'And?' when your size is mentioned. It's not how much weight you're carrying, but how you carry yourself that matters

I'm the fat one. My family are all thin and glamorous. One Xmas my mother and my oldest brother made up a little song about Vampire is fat because she steals all the biscuits, and sang it to everyone.
(I hadn't stolen biscuits.)

I don’t understand how or why alcoholism because a ‘glamorous lifestyle choice’ but overeating is ‘gross and frowned upon’ surely they’re very similar.

Historically they were both a sign of wealth.

Now they're both a sign of poverty.

They are probably just very hungry. Being hungry all the time makes people tetchy and rude.

I haven't come across that and certainly don't think it is a class issue. I wouldn't dream of fat shaming anyone but sometimes people with a weight issue talk about it themselves, how they want to lose weight etc, which causes their friends to add their bit. I suppose some don't know when to stop.

Just for the record, I am not fat but have been in the past so do understand what it's like.

I think we should all spend less time with people with negative vibes/comments

One of my friends always comments on my size/shape. At 6ft and 12 stone I am simply huuuge to her. She is confused if anyone finds me attractive and has recently warned me that my biceps are getting too big "for a woman" (I was actually quite proud about that last one, so it did not get to me )

But to be honest, I tend to avoid her as I don't need a negative comment on my appearance every time she sees me

My grandma makes regular negative comments about my weight. I now find it helps to ask how much she is currently drinking...she used to be an alcoholic. The weight related comments have drastically reduced since I started this tact!

What baffles me and I Absolutely can’t get my head around Is how the ‘awfully middle class’ bubble can be so preoccupied with health/weight/fitness on the one hand but be raging alcoholics on the other but not see that as hypocritical.

Ha, were you eating supper with us?!
They are all pissed!

I had it out with the person that made the comment despite my family never talking about anything and I think it’s all ok. We never speak bluntly to each other as a family (so directly) but I think she realised she’d crossed a line.

blierussian I never ever talk about my weight. I grew up and spent most of my 20’s as a slim person and I simply don’t talk about my weight now. Sadly I feel it speaks for me.

Totally true. It's all they have to feel smug about I guess.

You can always guarantee Worra will be on a weight thread. The faux concern is palpable.

You can always guarantee Worra will be on a weight thread. The faux concern is palpable.

WTF? I made one post - pointing out the historical significance of wealth relating to alcohol and overeating

I have no concern about that, faux or otherwise

I'm overweight, but I identify as a thin person...

@WorraLiberty I think you have a stalker!