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AIBU?

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Original poster

To hate when Parents do this

110 replies

QueenViki · 26/12/2019 11:35

I have a Mum friend on Facebook - her young daughter has contracted chicken pox at Christmas. Mum is sharing pictures of the poor little girl looking pale and miserable with spots in her torso accompanied by lots of ridiculous hashtags #Christmaspox etc. Aibu to think parents should not have the right to do this? The poor little thing is miserable enough without her photo being shared to all and sundry. Surely even little people are entitled to some privacy and dignity when they’re feeling very poorly .

OP posts:
Beldon · 26/12/2019 11:42

I do find this a very odd thing for parents to do. I have a friend on Facebook that shares pictures of her daughter after every epileptic fit, along with all the hashtags.

WorraLiberty · 26/12/2019 11:49

YANBU but then I find the whole concept of posting other people's photos online weird.

Most adults find it totally unacceptable, yet they think it's fine to do it to their kids for likes 'n love hearts.

IckyIsAFuckingStupidWord · 26/12/2019 11:50

I have a friend on Facebook that shares pictures of her daughter after every epileptic fit

That’s fucking disgusting on so many levels.

LadyTiredWinterBottom2 · 26/12/2019 11:53

It's not that it's weird. She's doing it for attention and sympathy. It's more than weird, she's a narcissistic nut case.

TreeTopTim · 26/12/2019 11:54

YANBU. But then I don't like people posting photos of their kids on social media at all. I have no photos of my ds on SM and I don't post anything about him either.

FishCanFly · 26/12/2019 11:58

Bloody awful. I hope these kids will return the favour in years to come when parents are old and incontinent

Moomin12345 · 26/12/2019 12:00

The daughter should document meticulously the next illness that the mother contracts (hopefully something visually pleasing, like Syphilis) and plaster it all over her social media too. YANBUSmile

Booboostwo · 26/12/2019 12:01

It entirely depends on the child and their wishes. My DD has asked for me to post photos of her on FB after operations and procedures. I am part of a support group for her illness and she wants to show other children there how brave she has been. She also asks for her photos to be posted on my general feed so friends and family can see how brave she is being. Some children enjoy seeing their photos posted and the responses. It can make them feel positive about themselves at a difficult time.

Also to an extent it normalizes people who are disabled and/or look unwell/different.

SerenDippitty · 26/12/2019 12:06

YANBU. Find it odd that people even take photos of their children when they are crying/distressed (even if it’s for a trivial reason). Never mind sharing them.

TheClausSeason · 26/12/2019 12:07

I don't understand people posting pics of their kids on Facebook at all. My favourite is when people post the ultrasound pictures- I don't even know who some of the people on my friends list are anymore, it's been that long since they were added, but I know what their foetus looks like in utero.

LittleSweet · 26/12/2019 12:08

I saw a post from someone whose dd was rushed to hospital in an ambulance post a photo of her in the ambulance on Facebook. Facebook is the last thing I'd be thinking about in that situation.

recklessruby · 26/12/2019 12:13

Well when my dc had chickenpox (days before social media) they were feeling really unwell so that would have been a horrible thing to do. Just look after the poor things out of the limelight.
Those childhood illnesses can make you feel really rotten. I had measles as a kid and remember it being really scary. I also remember my mum looking after me, not thinking I know Ruby s looking rough let s take a picture!
Is it done for attention like hey look at me being Florence nightingale to my sick dc I am mother of the year?
Would they like pics of them throwing up with a sick bug on fb?
Not fair imo.

WorraLiberty · 26/12/2019 12:14

I think it's all attention seeking by proxy really, whether the kids are ill or not.

Of course the standard excuse is that 'Granny in Aus' and 'Uncle Bob in Timbuktu' want to see the kid's pics and it's apparently 'easier' to stick them on FB than in a group chat/email.

Then the parents will try telling their kids that looks aren't important. You couldn't make it up.

IceCreamAndCandyfloss · 26/12/2019 12:17

YANBU. It’s all attention seeking, just like the cryptic posts or the tagging in when at hospital etc.

Bluerussian · 26/12/2019 12:20

I think it is appalling. When I read of such things I wish facebook had never been thought of.

Blackbear19 · 26/12/2019 12:21

I refused to allow MIL from taking photos of my DS when he was ill in hospital, apparently she wanted to show FIL. I took a guess she would also have shared will a dozen other people who've never met DS or potentially online. So I said "No that's not fair to take photos of a sick child." I also took the view FIl could have visited if he was that interested.

Zoidbergonthehalfshell · 26/12/2019 12:25

Oh, I hate it when people do this. I remember seeing one post (it had gone viral, ffs) with a video of the state of their child and their car after the poor little sod had suffered a really violent attack of diarrhoea in his car seat. Really? I'd have been more concerned with getting him out of there, cleaning him up and making him feel better than taking a video which nobody wants to see. Also, he's going to be so thrilled to see that when he's older.

Daffodil55 · 26/12/2019 12:37

I have seen recently some examples of how Facebook is absolute shit. People logging in simply to insult others and air their family disputes in the most horrendous way. It is car crash stuff and I am totally perplexed at how anyone thinks this is ok.

As for the children and baby photos and comments, I have tried explaining to some idiots that paedophiles will be swarming social media to see pictures of little girls in fairy costumes et al

These parents obviously think it does not apply to them and that their darling offspring looking all cute and innocent will only be viewed by decent honorable individuals. I know more and more people are now locking down their profiles so only family and friends can view but this is no guarantee that amongst those viewers there are no dodgy folk harbouring sordid secrets.
As for publishing photos of children being ill or distressed etc I just do not get this at all.

mamma536 · 26/12/2019 12:39

When my DS was born both my mum and my aunt asked me to record his crying because "baby cries are so sweet". I said no, it was too upsetting. Mum said she wouldn't be upset and I said, no DS and I would be the upset ones!

NearlyOutedMyself · 26/12/2019 12:40

I have a friend on FB who checks herself into lots of activities and posts dozens of pictures to do with her children (including the chocolatey-face or broken foot-type pics). I ended up hiding her posts as I knew more about her daily routine than mine Confused. Her kids are only about 11, 8 and 5 but they've got an internet footprint to rival a c-class celebrity!

TellMeWhoTheVilliansAre · 26/12/2019 12:41

I don't even know who some of the people on my friends list are anymore, it's been that long since they were added

TheClausSeason, you do know you can remove people from your friend list, don't you?

nativityhumbug · 26/12/2019 12:42

... and when people "check-in" to hospital. A friend put a picture of her little boy ill in hospital on Facebook. Can't imagine even going on sm at that time, let alone posting a private picture!

Roselilly36 · 26/12/2019 12:46

I thought it was just me that found it odd. I would never dream of posting pics of my DS’s.

LadyTiredWinterBottom2 · 26/12/2019 12:50

@nativityhumbug of yes, checking in but not saying what's wrong....

NothingIsWrong · 26/12/2019 12:53

We had the pox one Christmas. We all got up, opened some presents and went back to bed. I had tonsillitis, two kids with pox - DH snuggled us all and provided food/medicine as appropriate. We had Christmas dinner three days later when we were feeling up to it again.