Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

‘That’s me done for food today’ after a 3 course lunch

350 replies

Offred2 · 19/12/2019 16:23

I went to a restaurant with four friends for a Christmas lunch a few days ago. We all ate 3 courses and had a glass of wine each (none of us are big drinkers). The portions were decent-sized but not ridiculously big.

As we were finishing one of my friends said something along the lines of ‘that was lovely, I wont be needing anything else to eat today’. Following this all my other friends nodded/agreed.

While I didn’t say anything I was thinking that this is not the case for me at all! After that lunch at 1pm I ate beans on toast at around 7pm. I think of myself as someone with a pretty normal appetite, but if my friends were being truthful I ate a substantial amount more than them that day.

I remember a few years back my MiL making a similar comment after a restaurant lunch, that she wouldn’t need to eat anything else that day. However as we happened to be staying with her at the time I know she later ate sandwich and soup at dinner time.

So - my friend’s comment got me thinking. What do people actually mean when they use this phrase? Is it literal, as in ‘after this big lunch I will not eat any food until tomorrow’? Or do people simply mean that they won’t need to have a big evening meal, but might have eg a sandwich? Or is it something some people (women!) say without meaning it, to indicate they have a small/delicate appetite, though they may have every intention of eating something else that day.

For what it’s worth all of my friends in the restaurant are healthy weights, and as far as I know no one has any history of disordered eating.

OP posts:
Sophj19 · 19/12/2019 17:02

I’d still have something to eat at around 7-8pm. I couldn’t go for the rest of the day not eating anything else 🙈

undercoveraessedai · 19/12/2019 17:02

Ha - I had a Christmas meal at lunchtime and am already happily snacking. And dinner is planned for 8ish!

But I know people who say this and actually don't eat again, and people who say this and then do eat later, so I think it is more social conditioning than actually meant on the whole?

Ginkypig · 19/12/2019 17:03

It normally depends on the type of meal for me. Some things just leave me full and uncomfortable for ages but others I'm fine again by tea time.

I have said similar to this but I would probably say "well I probably won't need much later" I wouldn't say oh il never be able to eat again today or similar.

I tend to have one main meal a day so if I have a big lunch (depending on what it is and how full I feel) that would be my main meal and I might have a roll or something or a packet of crisps later.

I hate this comparison thing that humans do. My view is as long as your choices etc don't impact on others who the fucks cares how someone else chooses to live or eat or dress or whatever else!

Ilovemypyjamas · 19/12/2019 17:05

Agree completely with @Havaina

I will eat lunch and then in the evening I will be hungry again.

My mum does this all the time 'oh, I couldn't possibly manage anything else all day!!'

Rubbish.

NearlyOutedMyself · 19/12/2019 17:06

I usually mean it until my next meal at the time.

SerenDippitty · 19/12/2019 17:07

If I’d had a three course lunch I would probably just have some cheese and biscuits in the evening.

JacobReesClunge · 19/12/2019 17:07

I have a big appetite and eat too much, and have overweight BMI for that reason. I probably still wouldn't be hungry for the rest of the day after a three course meal. Maybe an apple or piece of toast tops. Can't imagine I'd announce that though?

Dahlietta · 19/12/2019 17:07

Even if they didn’t eat anything else though, I wouldn’t really consider beans on toast ‘a substantial amount more’.

TheFairyCaravan · 19/12/2019 17:08

I wouldn't have been able to eat the three courses be it at lunchtime or dinnertime. And no, I'd not eat anything else that day.

The responses on this thread are the precise reason why I hate eating out with anyone other than DH or the kids. I'm not "competitively undereating" I'm just eating what I want and need. I hate feeling full and bloated so don't overeat. You look after your appetite and let other people look after theirs.

chimpandzee · 19/12/2019 17:08

I tend to only eat one big main meal a day so if I had a three course lunch I would definitely not be hungry in the evening. If I eat a big one course lunch I wouldn't either. I'm talking huge burger and chips maybe with other sides, like onion rings, coleslaw etc. That would totally fill me up for the rest of the day. If I had a light salad or a bowl of soup, I'd definitely eat again later. I wouldn't need to tell everyone though!!

Gwenhwyfar · 19/12/2019 17:08

I had a massive Christmas dinner for lunch at work a few days ago. Two courses rather than free, but way too much food and was suffering all afternoon. I really didn't have anything that evening.
However, just being three courses in itself wouldn't necessarily stop me eating again. It would depend on the courses and I would just see how I felt in the evening.

Dinosauratemydaffodils · 19/12/2019 17:08

My mum would say that. She would also mean it and would have left at least 50 percent of her starter and main and 90 percent of her dessert.

I never have dessert but if I have a two course meal at lunchtime, I'd probably only have a small snack at tea time.

Notnowokay · 19/12/2019 17:08

It depends on what I do next. If it involves sitting down then no more food for me. If I have an active afternoon I'm likely to eat a small snack. Anyway, I tend to eat two substantial meals a day and one snack if I feel like it. I didn't count any hot drinks I drink. Am I supposed to count them?

christmastreewithhairyfairy · 19/12/2019 17:08

If I had a 3 course lunch I'd still have dinner. I might scrimp on the afternoon snack though Grin
I need 3 meals a day. I'm a healthy weight. People have different metabolisms!

Ohdearohdearyme · 19/12/2019 17:09

After a 3 course lunch I either wouldnt est anything for dinner or I would have a very small snack.

DoIhavetobejolly · 19/12/2019 17:10

I will always have tea on an evening, even if I've had a big lunch.

As I've gotten older I do find that I need to eat less if I've had a big lunch, so it's generally something light. In the olden days I could happily eat two large meals a day.

I do get frustrated with the competitive non eating/virtue signalling stuff that goes on around food.

Somebody I know is terrible for this, to the point they comment negatively on other peoples food choices and try to control what and how much other people eat. If you believed what they told you about what they eat at main meals you'd think they had the appetite of a church mouse.

However what they don't tell you, and I'm not even sure they realise themselves, is that they are a secret eater and regularly snack on crap during the day.

I've learnt not to believe a word people say about what they eat.

MitziK · 19/12/2019 17:12

DP does similar. He'll pathetically pick and nibble at half a teaplate eat from a plate that has a reasonable amount of food on it, especially if three tiny portions come out on separate plates and then use it as justification for not eating anything except a packet of Haribo and a handful crisps for the next 3 days.

He's got an ED.

He grew up around people who said that sort of shit. But, going by the sort of meals he makes that are 'like the stuff we had at home', chances are that they were so fucking chronically constipated that they couldn't take a dump for a week, so didn't have the physical space to put more food in.

Gwenhwyfar · 19/12/2019 17:12

"Sounds like competitive undereating to me. "

Don't be silly. Having a three course meal and not eating again the evening is hardly undereating! Unless the portions were small, you've probably had the equivalent of two meals in one go so no need for more in the evening.

dottiedodah · 19/12/2019 17:12

I would feel full for a while but would have egg on toast or a sandwich in the evening ,

Bazingabong · 19/12/2019 17:12

I've never said it and will openly admit I will happily still be eating dinner later.

Obligatorync · 19/12/2019 17:13

I don't say it but I don't eat again afterwards. Am still fat though!

WorraLiberty · 19/12/2019 17:13

The thing with threads like this is as adults we're all mature enough to understand that everyone has different appetites. Some people will be hungry after a 3 course meal and some won't.

We're also all mature enough to understand that when a group of friends are together, random conversations happen and meaningless comments are uttered.

Yet, here we have projection yet again by posters who see a throwaway comment like 'I won't need to eat later', as some sort of personal affront/attack on themselves Confused

This really is the sort of reaction I only see on Mumsnet (thankfully) but then I suppose I don't surround myself with such easily offended/wound up people in real life.

just file under airhead babble and ignore.

That ^^ is just one example of a ridiculous reaction to a fairly mundane comment about not eating after a big lunch.

MikeUniformMike · 19/12/2019 17:14

I'd say it and mean it, some will say it because they think they mean it but probably will eat later. Beans on toast is fine as a light meal.

Wouldn't lose sleep over it.

churchandstate · 19/12/2019 17:16

If I ate three courses for a lateish lunch (finishing around 2pm) I would be happy with a snack in the evening. Unless the courses were watercress soup, pine nut salad and fruit.

LagunaBubbles · 19/12/2019 17:17

The lunch portions for Christmas meals can be really small. I had my works Christmas lunch yesterday, a small bowl of soup for a starter and then turkey. It came with 1 pig in blanket and 1 roast potato. So yes it filled me up then but then was hungry later.

Swipe left for the next trending thread