Aibu!? Neighbour parking issue!

[itsalwaysunny]

Need abit of insight as I'm stressing out tonight after yet another incident with our neighbours. Have lived here 4 years it's my grandads house so have grown up in it, now I live here with my partner and children, our neighbours have two cars and us one. Their drive is for one but just about fits 2 cars, but only because we purposefully park as close as is physically possible without hitting our house to accommodate them. They asked us to do this on the very day we moved in we agreed and have done so ever since.

Lately though the parking has been a big issue, for example one instance I was getting out of a taxi mid day after work a few weeks ago and it was parked on our driveway to help me unload my shopping, literally for two mins if that, next door neighbours arrive home and immediately get out and tell me to move they need to park. OK that's fine I say even though I'm abit annoyed, taxi moves his car and parks away from our house and then I go over and get my shopping out from the car now parked at the top of the cul de sac.

A few other times my mum has been dropping us off home ( me and kids) and she refuses to wait for us to park and get out instead forces us to go out of our way and let her pass before we park.

Last week when my in laws were dropping my children off in the evening after having them after school they parked directly behind us whilst dropping them at the door, they weren't coming in and had left their car door open so it was obvious they werent stopping, next door neighbour came home and had to wait a minute, because of the way they have been in the past and because we could see her waiting we asked my father in law just to move the car to let her in, he did and when she got out he said to her apologies for blocking you in etc and she just replied telling him there are many other places to park and to not block her in again, he just said OK and got back in the car.

Finally tonight my parents were in a similar situation dropping my children off after having them after school, they parked just behind our car and proceeded to bring the children to us waiting at the door, next door neighbour came out of the house and said to my mum 'wouldn't it be annoying if I had to go somewhere really quickly and I couldn't because you were blocking me in.' She then stood there and watched as my parents dropped the kids off then just went back in when they left?!

Am I being unreasonable to think she's blowing a huge insignificant issue wildly out of proportion?! I would like to add every single week without fail their gardener parks outside our drive blocking us in and we have to tell them to move when we need to go out, it's not a problem we just ask and they move, the same things happen when their parents drop their children off and park across the drive ways blocking us in and we have to wait a few mins to park etc I wouldn't ever dream of being so passive aggressive and being so rude to my neighbours family. It just seems like such a stupid thing to be so obsessed about and I feel like I'm walking on eggshells around them, constantly conscious of parking too close (within our boundary) so it might be too much of a squeeze for them and yet she doesn't care about us, that it might be annoying to wait 2 more extra minutes in your car whilst my children are dropped off but I'm sure there are more important things in the world!? Also when she says there are plenty of other places to park, by that she means at the very top of our road, which, as you can imagine when it's in the evening and cold or raining I would much rather my children be dropped off as close to my house as possible even if it means her waiting for an extra minute, we do that for them and other neighbours and I really don't mind!!

Sorry for the long post I'm just getting worked up and stressed out about this

If it wasn't for the fact you mention your have children of school age I'd swear from your diagram you live at the bottom of my cul de sac!!

Tell the lazy sods to stop using your drive as access !!

@runnerduck I think you are right, I'm going to just do what we need to do from now on to get in our house easily and not care about them, they don't care about us!

Agreed.
The first time they were rude, the arrangement would have ended.
The cheek of them.

They clearly have zero appreciation for your accommodating them and think you are a pushover that can be bullied.

Why would you allow them to treat you like that more than once.

Cease accommodating them.

"It no longer works for us".

An stop rushing and moving.
Let them wait.

Some big plant pots with christmas lights threaded between them, instant festive fence

So like this? Your parents parked on space 'X' which meant neighbours can't exit their top space by the pink arrow route (over your drive)?

So, they ask you to move your parents car off your drive so that they don’t have to move theirs? WTF?

@trixiefranklin yep! I should have got you to do my diagram 😁

I'm even more shocked looking at your picture so they want you to move up as far as possible so they can go on your drive so the other car doesn't have to be moved ? What cf and they've got a cheek to complain. Omg nah just keep parking in the middle and if they say move ignore and if they say you agreed go I'm sorry I don't remember that and no that's not convenient for me goodbye.

Stop this nonsense now. You are not blocking them in, your guests are not blocking them in. They are too lazy to move their own cars and blocking themselves in!!!

Cheeks sods!

They’re cheeky entitled gits. A pair of life’s takers.

OP you had been far too accommodating over the years. Time to reclaim your property. They have no right to access your drive other than what you permit them. How dare they berate you for using it yourself!

Cheeky fuckers!! Will they be contributing for your drive repairs when needed? They'll be causing wear and tear.

Next time they say it get In your car and move a few inches. Preferably closer to her side. Then act dumb and say sorry you want me to move my car on my own drive ahhh ok wait I have something. (Go In pocket and pull out a middle finger). Then walk inside.

They’re arseholes. Get that fence built.

Stop accommodating them! As a pp mentioned, their right of access over YOUR drive will become law if you don’t put a stop to their cheeky fuckery. I seriously advise a wall, never mind an easily oopsiknockeditdownfence. Why are you allowing this when she’s being a twat about your parents stopping for seconds to unload the dc or the taxi so you can unload your shopping? You’re being WAY too nice. Stop! Their gardener inconveniences you weekly, you should not have to ask him every single bloody time to stop blocking you, that’s crazy.

Cautionary tale-a mate owned a stable yard, he allowed the neighbour who lived in the house above to park his caravan there. It made reversing the horse box really hard, but he was being neighbourly etc. Some years on, he isn’t legally allowed to get rid of the guy’s caravan, which the neighbour STILL parks on his land. Bonkers.

Remember that no verbal arrangement is locked in place forever- it’s quite normal to review these regularly, in line with changes in your family or theirs.

By all means let them know with a brief note through the letterbox that unfortunately the arrangement doesn’t work for your family & visitors any more. No need to give apologies, excuses, explanations. If they blow up about it, look concerned and say ‘It sounds like you’d prefer a solid fence, so all this who parks where is solved more clearly. I’ll look into it for you.’

At some point people like this do stop shooting themselves in the foot, but it takes a while to dawn on them where their true long-term self-interest lies. And how they are their own worst enemy.

I have a neighbour (who is right this minute grumbling audibly) looking at his side of an solid 8ft fence he didn’t want, because he pushed my good nature too far. It’s cost him money, energy, most of his peace of mind and the ridicule of the neighbourhood. I suspect next time we clash over some invented slight, he’ll be a little more careful and considered.

So they have always just taken advantage of the fact that you only have one car that allows them to manoeuvre their top/first one without having to move their second. And get annoyed when you have a second car, for whatever reason (and well within your rights if I'm getting the diagram) on your drive?

Nah fuck those cheeky fuckers! Time to tell them they either move their second car if they want their first one out or take their own suggestion and park it elsewhere. Some people.

Wow major Cheeky fuckers. Moaning when your parents park on your drive, when they could just as easily move their own second car and back out the other. Park midway in your drive from now on and get your parents to park behind you.
They can do what Dh and I do and play musical cars to get both in the drive, as do all our two car neighbours.

The solution in 90% of these cases is a FENCE. Build one asap. They can argue with the fence and the land registry.

Oh dear god what a peanut of piss takers!! Get a small wall up!

So when the taxi was dropping you off with your shopping and your parents were dropping the kids off etc. they were all parked on your drive and the neighbour was pissy because it meant she couldn't immediately drive out over your drive without moving their second car? Because if that's the case I would just stop accommodating them at all in how you park.

Even if that isn't the case and the taxi/your parents were blocking the shole drive for both houses, it sounds like something they do themselves and you should not feel bad about doing that and if they comment again just say, pleasantly, - "We'll only be a minute. It's no different to your own parents/gardener/etc. blocking the drive." and get on with things. You really do have to stop accomodating they've become entitled (and if their use of your drive keeps up without interruption and agreement that it is a temporary boon you grant them they may gain rights over it - so check that out and put your foot down (or draw up a contract to protect yourselves) if necessary.

Fence or wall, definitely.

Actually watching your dad on YOUR drive and trying to intimidate him to move!

Oh the entitled bastards. Don't accept this any longer

I would not put in writing anything that says you’ve previously agreed to it!

Say your landlord wants a fence up.

Firstly I would check the boundary on your title deeds with a solicitor if necessary and check if you can put a fence up . It would probably be a short visit and well worth it. Are there any other houses in your drive that have put up fences ?