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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu!? Neighbour parking issue!

265 replies

itsalwaysunny · 17/12/2019 21:59

Need abit of insight as I'm stressing out tonight after yet another incident with our neighbours. Have lived here 4 years it's my grandads house so have grown up in it, now I live here with my partner and children, our neighbours have two cars and us one. Their drive is for one but just about fits 2 cars, but only because we purposefully park as close as is physically possible without hitting our house to accommodate them. They asked us to do this on the very day we moved in we agreed and have done so ever since.

Lately though the parking has been a big issue, for example one instance I was getting out of a taxi mid day after work a few weeks ago and it was parked on our driveway to help me unload my shopping, literally for two mins if that, next door neighbours arrive home and immediately get out and tell me to move they need to park. OK that's fine I say even though I'm abit annoyed, taxi moves his car and parks away from our house and then I go over and get my shopping out from the car now parked at the top of the cul de sac.

A few other times my mum has been dropping us off home ( me and kids) and she refuses to wait for us to park and get out instead forces us to go out of our way and let her pass before we park.

Last week when my in laws were dropping my children off in the evening after having them after school they parked directly behind us whilst dropping them at the door, they weren't coming in and had left their car door open so it was obvious they werent stopping, next door neighbour came home and had to wait a minute, because of the way they have been in the past and because we could see her waiting we asked my father in law just to move the car to let her in, he did and when she got out he said to her apologies for blocking you in etc and she just replied telling him there are many other places to park and to not block her in again, he just said OK and got back in the car.

Finally tonight my parents were in a similar situation dropping my children off after having them after school, they parked just behind our car and proceeded to bring the children to us waiting at the door, next door neighbour came out of the house and said to my mum 'wouldn't it be annoying if I had to go somewhere really quickly and I couldn't because you were blocking me in.' She then stood there and watched as my parents dropped the kids off then just went back in when they left?!

Am I being unreasonable to think she's blowing a huge insignificant issue wildly out of proportion?! I would like to add every single week without fail their gardener parks outside our drive blocking us in and we have to tell them to move when we need to go out, it's not a problem we just ask and they move, the same things happen when their parents drop their children off and park across the drive ways blocking us in and we have to wait a few mins to park etc I wouldn't ever dream of being so passive aggressive and being so rude to my neighbours family. It just seems like such a stupid thing to be so obsessed about and I feel like I'm walking on eggshells around them, constantly conscious of parking too close (within our boundary) so it might be too much of a squeeze for them and yet she doesn't care about us, that it might be annoying to wait 2 more extra minutes in your car whilst my children are dropped off but I'm sure there are more important things in the world!? Also when she says there are plenty of other places to park, by that she means at the very top of our road, which, as you can imagine when it's in the evening and cold or raining I would much rather my children be dropped off as close to my house as possible even if it means her waiting for an extra minute, we do that for them and other neighbours and I really don't mind!!

Sorry for the long post I'm just getting worked up and stressed out about thisSadConfused

OP posts:
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Cohle · 17/12/2019 22:15

The neighbours are obviously being ridiculous but I think by retaliating you'll just escalate the situation further. Why not pop round and explain the effect their passive aggressive comments are having on you and point out that you are going out of your way to accommodate them and you would hate to have to stop that and put up a fence if you can't all keep things amicable.

dementedpixie · 17/12/2019 22:15

I'm guessing both of them have a single driveway but if OP parks off to the side the neighbour can squeeze 2 cars on plus OPs 1 car. Stop being nice if they are not showing any gratitude and are being cheeky bastards

twoturtledove · 17/12/2019 22:18

Your neighbour is a twat

BrieAndChilli · 17/12/2019 22:18

Put a wall or what ever up on the boundary (make sure it doesn’t go over the boundary so they can’t make a legal fuss about it.
Stop moving out of their way and just ignore them. They don’t give you the same courtesy and just block you in etc so don’t think twice about them. I can’t see how they manage to park their cars on their driveway without going over on to yours. Surely if you are moving your car over as much as possible it means they are encroaching ok your driveway. Just park however you want on your property and leave them to sort their own parking out.
I think if they block you in while you are parked on your drive (providing it has a dropped kerb) then you can call the police. (Just in case is they can’t park double abreast any more they retaliate and block you in
We do need a photo or diagram as it’s really hard to visualise from what you’ve said.

Mummyoflittledragon · 17/12/2019 22:18

They can claim rights if this situation continues. They already think they have a moral right. Soon it will be a legal one. Fencing off the drives is the best option. For the time being I would start parking on the space as close to the boundary as possible then just get in the car one the side of your drive.

Surfskatefamily · 17/12/2019 22:19

I agree with pp. Fence up asap and then let any moaning go over your head

pictish · 17/12/2019 22:20

Fuck them right off. They are dominating you and it’s bloody ridiculous.

pictish · 17/12/2019 22:21

I still want to see a diagram though.

HundredMilesAnHour · 17/12/2019 22:23

You've been far too nice for far too long and they clearly don't appreciate it. So stop being nice and use your drive as it was intended to be used i.e. by you!

Wilmalovescake · 17/12/2019 22:23

So they are cramming two cars on a single driveway.

What do you have, a single or a double driveway? Wide or long? Are you blocking their access when you have two vehicles on yours?

I can’t picture it from what you’ve said.

LyraSilvertongueBelacqua · 17/12/2019 22:24

You absolutely need to talk to them!!

Waiting on disgram

bigbubbles · 17/12/2019 22:25

It is a penguin bollard situation without a doubt.

WhenYouCantRunYouCrawl · 17/12/2019 22:26

I'm just here for the diagram.

supercee · 17/12/2019 22:28

Putting off sleep for the diagram.

kinsss · 17/12/2019 22:28

Bullies are cowards deep down with lots of control issues.

IF you are in the right (and we cannot really comment until we get a diagram so FGS hurry up!), then challenge them at every opportunity.

They seem to have no problem with this approach towards you do they?

ActualHornist · 17/12/2019 22:29

I guess it really depends on whether you feel you can talk to them. Although I’d recommend that in the first instance.

  1. Knock on the door (don’t do it when you’ve come in or are going out and backs are up) and say you need a word. Say you’ve noticed they can be a bit short, and seem a bit upset when you’re trying to get in or out of their house. Tell them that they need to cut you some slack and be a bit more patient - just like you are - as you’ve always been amenable.
  2. Dependent on their response, you might want to remind them that you’re doing them a favour and you’d rather not get into an argument, but they are being deliberately antagonistic which doesn’t lead to good neighbour relations.
  3. Put a fence up Grin
TrixieFranklin · 17/12/2019 22:31

Penguin bollards along the boundary?

pictish · 17/12/2019 22:31

Just a simple diagram is fine.

It’s my bedtime.

itsalwaysunny · 17/12/2019 22:33

I keep posting with a diagram it says success but doesn't show!

OP posts:
Rumnraisin · 17/12/2019 22:35

Talk about “give them an inch...”
They have completely taken advantage of your good nature and are now being self-righteous over non-issues - as already mentioned, they are bullying you.
Please build a fence - their drive/cars situation is not your responsibility what so ever.

itsalwaysunny · 17/12/2019 22:36

This is our drive on the left the grey line is the garage which we park as far too as we can, the right is their driveway it's angled and if we were to park closer or get a fence they couldn't open doors of top car and bottom car would always have to move to let top car on off! So sorry it wouldn't let me post it and oh took so long I did a basic one Grin

Aibu!? Neighbour parking issue!
OP posts:
notapizzaeater · 17/12/2019 22:40

Just stop and if they say something remember the phrase 'sorry that doesn't work for me'

Instagrump · 17/12/2019 22:40

I can't really say much more than what's already been said on this unanimous thread. Stop parking to the edge of your drive to enable them to park two cars on their single drive. Just stop.
When they get pissy just tell them that your parking to the side is causing issues when you try to use what's left of your drive for quick drop offs and pick ups so you're done with struggling. They should look into parking their second car elsewhere so that your visitors are no longer blocking their squished in car in.

TreeSwayer · 17/12/2019 22:41

I wouldn't even knock on their door, I would just go out with a tape measure and wait for them to come and enquire what you are doing.

I would then tell them your Grandad wants to put a fence up to mark the boundary and watch them squirm.

They are bullying bastards and if it was me there is no way I would have accommodated them when they spoke to my parents the way they spoke to yours.

dementedpixie · 17/12/2019 22:41

Lots of people have to move cars about to let the correct car out. You shouldn't be inconvenienced to use your own driveway

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