He wont have tory voting grandparents over for xmas

[Smilebehappy123]

As it says in the title
DH refusing to have my grandparents for xmas dinner, says he cant stand to have xmas dinner with them as they shared with us yesterday that they voted tory , we are both very left wing and have always voted labour
Not only does he not want to have xmas dinner with them he doesn't want to socialise at all with them.
What can I do ? Grandfather is very political so this topic will be brought up
Dh says he cant stand the selfish old bastards and doesn't want to know them

Your DH sounds like an idiot. Tell him to grow up.

If he doesn't want to spend Christmas with them because he does not like them, that's quite reasonable, but not based on who they voted for.

Wow. This thread is very enlightening if nothing else.

Yes you have totally drip fed. Made dh out to be a shit in first post.

Tell him you'll make up a plate for him and he can eat on his own in the kitchen.
How come you don't hear of Tories refusing to socialise with those who vote Labour?

My F would probably have refused to associate with Labour voters. He always maintained that they were communists. That kind of view was common back then, as it was during the Cold War. He expected his family to tow his line when it came to politics. Including my DM.

But then, he was a controlling abuser in other ways, too.

I would find it hard to care for in-laws like that myself tbh. My in-laws are strongly pro Leave, too, though they're not particularly right wing, but they're not obnoxious with it.

But I would never tell my DH that he wasn't allowed to see them. Your DH is being controlling and you need to stand up to him. It's your call not his.

@CrossingTheAlpsInOtley You sound like a typical cold-hearted and selfish tory. I have read no threads about people wanting 'free' anything. That is YOUR interpretation. All they want, is a properly funded healthcare system and disability system. That's all. Of course people who are struggling, through no fault of their own, will be upset at the taking from the poor and giving to the rich. Any normal person would.

It says everything about you that you cannot even put yourself in someone else's shoes and understand their fear and stress, instead ignorantly dismiss them as after something 'free'. What a nasty and selfish and ignorant position you have. It's no wonder you identify with the OP's GP. To you, anyone who is poor and receiving help is getting something for 'free'. There is no reasoning with people as extreme as you, you are too far gone.

I've pressed YANBU by mistake as your options aren't clear!
My answer was YANBU, your DH is being an arsehole and needs to grow the hell up!

OMG RTFT people

@Smilebehappy123 I really feel your predicament. We have invited my parents over for Christmas dinner as a buffer for having my fil over. But their, especially my mums views are making me dread the day. A relative posted how happy they were with the result which she liked, and this has upset my dd (disabled) as she feels some of the Tory policies will affect her and people like her in a bad way. They would have voted for the Conservatives as they just want Brexit done. Not sure if they agree with the other policies.

I think I will see my parents beforehand and just say to them, esp if they bring up how happy they are etc, that we will not be talking politics at all on the day.

HIBU and very childish. Tell him to get over himself. And perhaps ban the topic of politics for the day.

Wow. Your DH sounds like a complete and utter 🔔. Everyone has different opinions and can vote how the hell they like just because you two don't agree. You both need to grow up.

@selmabear as many many many people and the OP have already said on this thread ‘her Grandparents will ignore a ban on politics’
Why don’t people read

At least read the OPs further postings Fgs

To be honest I sympathise with your DH. Not all old people are kind and frail.

If it was me I'd limit the time and totally ban all political conversation.

Re 'different opinions' - there's different opinions, and then there's being outright racist, homophobic etc. I mean, I'm Jewish, am I supposed to sit down and eat with Nazis knowing they want me dead, because it's just a difference of opinion? A more extreme example than Tories, true, but do you see my point?

Jeez - I hate BJ and am gutted labour didn’t get in but even I wouldn’t react this way! That’s too far!

How about your DH doesn't engage on any politics talk, and none of you respond to your DGD when he starts on it. He'll get tired of a one sided convo, trust me. Just a polite ' DGD, I told you, I don't want to talk about this.' and walk away should do it. Unless he's happy sitting on his own all day.

@Marnie76 they don’t read , because it doesn’t suit their opinion that all elderly people (especially family) must be catered too, and that all husbands are wrong, always

selmabear as many many many people and the OP have already said on this thread ‘her Grandparents will ignore a ban on politics’

So? Not selmabear obviously, but my comment still stands - he DOES need to grow up and realise that everyone has different opinions.
I didn't vote Tory, or Leave but I'm adult enough to realise that not everyone's the same and don't expect everyone to be the same as me or I'll sulk and not want to see them anymore.

OK, I have now RTFT. I have more sympathy with your dh than I did when I read just the OP. Your grandparents do sound pretty nasty (you don't say why your parents- their own children, and another grandchild are NT with them; but these things don't happen for no reason). And what really shocked me was that 'they laughed at the locals doing a shoebox collection for needy families as in their words 'they shouldn't spend their money on drugs and feed their kids '. Many people who are solid Tory voters believe strongly in helping others; they just don't think that the State should be the main one to do it; but it seems that your grandparents are just as mean-spirited when private charity is involved. However, you did invite them, despite knowing what they're like, and I don't think it would be right to un-invite them just because of one election (presumably they voted Tory in previous elections too!) Next time don't invite them, and perhaps do invite your parents and sister.

I wonder if all these people who are criticising your husband are right wing opinionated Tories themselves, @Smilebehappy123 .Your husband sounds principled and very nice.

I give up 😳. Have you read the OPs subsequent postings at all!

@SarahNade

How can you possibly believe that those threads weren't interested in themselves!

A remarkable talent for self deception shared by all those who wanted something for nothing and those who wanted a woke agenda which would have left the working class at the back of the line-jeered at for not understanding the 'wokeness' of it all!

But instead of honestly owning that-they pretend that they want free things for everyone, a woke agenda to benefit us all. Bullshit I'm afraid and bullshit that saw the Momentum Parasite Cult defeated.

Hooray!

The most hard hearted, nasty, hectoring people I've come across are these Momentum creeps and that has been the experience of many. You can roll a nasty shit in lentils and 'right-onness' but the stink of that shit rises.

If the DP of this post is true-unlikely, given the drip feeds- then he is a prime example of it. He's already thinking of their funerals-no doubt he'll be first in line with his pan handle out looking for an inheritance.

He sounds like a swivel eyed hectoring lunatic.

OP, your husband sounds a real nasty piece of work, saying that the only time he wants to be involved is to go to their funerals.
That is so out of order.