People arriving unannounced at your house

[SellMySoulForMoreSleep]

I am wondering if AIBU but a neighbour knocked at my door this afternoon and asked herself and her daughter in. I hate this, my house is often messy and it was no different this afternoon as I was trying to sort some Christmas stuff. I couldn't say no because it was cold and they were waiting for someone with keys to arrive at their house plus I'm not that rude to refuse them.

Just for the record if this was a close friend or family they would be totally welcome.

All round to foxe’s mn !

Fox’s - don’t want anyone showing up at the wrong address.

They were locked out....... its not like they just invited themselves round for a dinner and netflix evening. From the title I assumed you were going to say they continually invite themselves round!

A neighbour locked out of their house on a very cold day isn't exactly like people arriving for an unannounced visit, is it?

They had a problem, and needed help.

YABU

Yabu

You were annoyed that your neighbours asked to shelter at your house while they were locked out because you were busy sorting Christmas stuff.

Is this a joke?

When you and your young child next get locked out, i hope for their sake you don't have neighbours like yourself.

The trick is to not live in a mess. Not that hard. It doesn’t have to be deep-clean-no-workmen-in-the-toilet clean. Just tidy.

I keep one of those moon survival blankets by the front door to chuck at people in exactly this situation.

Not really, I'd be mortified if my neighbour, or anyone, in a predicament felt they could not knock on my door and ask for help. And in fact have rescued total strangers in similar situations and brought them in for tea. One was a lost old woman with dementia, took a while to track down where she was supposed to be. Another the confused mother of a neighbour who had turned up at the he wrong time and her daughter was out, so gave her tea while we waited for her daughter to come back.

And my house is a monumental mess!

You know it's Christmas and all that, you should've just put them In the stable?

Assuming this is a wind up?

I wouldn’t like anyone arrive unannounced, even family and friends but it’s completely different, your neighbours didn’t arrive unannounced, they needed your help, even I would be ok with this.
Something happened with us once and I was very upset, a teacher from DD’s school went near by, saw us and invited for a cup of tea. I don’t remember how clean was her house but I will always remember her kindness.

So you would rather 2 other human beings stood in the cold waiting to be let in to their home, then invite them in?

I would, sorry. I'm housebound with severe anxiety and I just couldn't deal with it. I wouldn't exacerbate my health for someone else I'm afraid. If I was locked out, I wouldn't dream of knocking a neighbours door and expect to be invited in. We all keep ourselves to ourselves here.

Are people so devoid of compassion for others now

I have compassion and I do what I can for others within my own means. In this case, I come first. If they knocked my door, they could try someone else's.

I try to keep my house visitor friendly, however with young children I can clean and they make mess as I go along.... there is a big difference between a home with young children and a dirty house in my opinion. However a friend know knocked on my door they are.wlecomed no matter how inconvenient x

We don’t answer the door if we are not expecting visitors, so they would have stood outside.

Oh god I can’t fucking bear it. And I bloody love socialising but on my terms only.

We all keep ourselves to ourselves here.

I very much doubt it, people are just avoiding you as you're unsociable and unwilling to help a person in need.

Yes I am unsociable. I have severe mental illness.

I've helped plenty of people in need, thanks. Cool to know how you feel about the mentally ill though, spingly

Your title is misleading. It was an emergency of sorts.

This is why I don't answer the door - though to be fair to me I never have any visitors unannounced or otherwise so it's only ever the post or a delivery and parcels just get put in the porch.

I don't answer the door in the first place

@Readthisearlier didn't say anything about people with MH issues, just stated that the "we keep ourselves to ourselves round here comment was bullshit" your neighbours aren't you and are unlikely to act like you.

I'd be seriously pissed off if a neighbour made anyone feel they couldn't knock on my door with a problem because someone decides for me that "we keep ourselves to ourselves round here", if you don't socialise with them how do you even know that or have the right to decide that?

Spingly, my post literally said I wouldn't let them in because of my mental illness. Your vicious comment about my neighbours avoiding me is simply not true.

Again, you'd be pissed off if your mentally ill neighbour wouldn't cause themselves to be more ill because you are so entitled you'd want to invite yourself in? It doesn't work like that, sorry.

None of my neighbours socialise with each other. We live our own lives. We exchange pleasantries if I ever leave the house and see anyone, and they do the same with others. HTH.

None of my neighbours socialise with each other. We live our own lives. We exchange pleasantries if I ever leave the house and see anyone, and they do the same with others. HTH.

@Readthisearlier but how do you know that? Also this was not about socialising anyway, it was about a person with a problem asking for help. You state you are housebound with anxiety yet know so much about your neighbours social lives, how do?

I'm sorry you suffer anxiety but you cannot decide how your neighbours would react to a person in need knocking on their door. It won't necessarily be the same way you do.

No one really calls at my door unexpectedly but if they do I would let them in if I felt like it, or talk to them on the doorstep if I felt like it, or ask them to leave if it turns out they are trying to sell me something.

But even if I was incredibly busy, I couldn't imagine begrudging giving a neighbour somewhere to sit down where they'd be warm and dry if they were locked out. If I didn't have time to sit with them they could sit in the living room and watch TV or something whilst I got on with whatever I needed to do.

I don't socialise with my neighbours either but I haven't a clue if any of them socialise with each other.

Spingly - nowhere did I mention what my neighbours would do. I have local family, a husband, children and we are a small village. I'm more than aware of most things that go on.

I haven't "decided" how anyone else would react in the same situation. Perhaps working on your inference skills would be quite useful