To have cried!

[7dayslater]

I'm 19. DS is 18 months.

I live with DP & DS. I work hard, I have 2 jobs. DP works too. So, no we don't just sit on our arses, but we still need UC help to pay the bills. I want(ed) to train and work in the NHS. I'm also interested in politics.

So yeah, when I woke up this morning and saw the election result I cried. Austerity is very real, it's not a joke or a fictional story. With the way it is right now, I cannot afford an education. I cannot afford to study for a career. I'm stuck where I am.

Sadder still, others have it far worse. There are children in poverty, a homelessness crisis, the NHS is crumbling when people need it more than ever. I can respect democracy. I can respect the vote. But I have to ask, for people like me - what now?

Op have yoy looked at the apprenticeship route?

It is tough OP. Try not to be too downhearted. As others have said, things will get easier as your child gets older.
If you are managing, hang in there. Enjoy your child. You never get these years back. Education and training is possible at all ages now, it wasn't when I was your age. I worked so many jobs before I had my dc, I lost count. I retrained when my youngest was 1yr and I was in my early 40s. You will get there, it might just take a little while.

It is her responsibility to provide for the family she chose to have and it isn't fair to make it seem like it is somehow their fault.

I absolutely think it’s fair to expect government to put in safety nets for young people so that they can re-enter education if they had a halting start to adulthood. That’s what I want a government for. Not to stand around berating people about making better choices. If they don’t want to do anything to help people, it’s my view that they should fuck right off.

Jesus. Some real nasty comments to the op. She is 19- give her a break. For those saying you should have chosen better- you have no idea of her circumstances. Abortion isn't for everyone and accidents can happen. Who said she chose to have a baby at this age?

It is ludicrous to me, that a young woman who wants to train as a HCP cannot do so for lack of funding, when we are so desperately short of NHS staff and will likely be even more so post Brexit.

FWIW, I don't think your age comes into it, except that you would have, if trained, more time as an asset to the NHS before you retired.

I applied to train as a nurse earlier this year and then realised that after paying for childcare I would be down about £20,000 a year, for three years, with no income except a student loan which I would then have to pay back.

Training as a nurse with dcs is next to impossible at the moment unless you are loaded and / or have a lot of help from family to cover childcare.

There are children in poverty, a homelessness crisis, the NHS is crumbling when people need it more than ever

There was a report on the other night from a food bank in Grimsby (funded by the EU according to the plaque on the wall), and Grimsby has the highest child poverty rate in the EU.

All the people getting their food in the food bank were voting for Boris, because they wanted out of the EU, to get rid of foreigners, and "Boris is the only politician who does what he says."

That is the reality of the UK. So my sympathies with the poor and downtrodden are wearing rather thin.

Cannot believe the hate the OP is getting here!

I was brought up by a skint single dad. We really really struggled to make ends meet, to the extent we stayed at my uncles house on the sly while he was on holiday so we could have heating. I worked my arse off at school and uni (praise Scotland's free higher education) and I'm now a solicitor. I still cried today. This is not a world I want to bring children in to and I worry so much for what the future holds for me DSD. It's absolutely nothing to do with OP's choices... I took and entirely different path and I'm still devastated and worried for the future

As much as an apprenticeship is ideal in the long run, you cannot live on the apprenticeship wage.

@Yetanotherwinter Yes because life is just that straightforward . What Disney movie do you live in?

what if illness and disability do strike?

the Tory Party have demolished most of the help and support for those of us who need it.

We don't chose illness. Especially when caused by medical mistakes.

I was interested in working for the NHS, as my mother did. When was 15 she sat me down with pay info on lots of occupations and fields, showing me how low NHS pay is. I chose a better paid path.

You can always go back into education when your child goes to school.

What exactly do you think the Labour party would have done for you in your particular situation?

my sympathies with the poor and downtrodden are wearing rather thin

I'm ashamed to say it, but I know what you mean 😬. All the Tory voters being interviewed today do not look rich and are in deprived areas. I won't say it, but you know...those festive roast birds and the birth of Jesus / pagan winter festival.

Hey op , every one has down days where their situation feels hopeless - I get them regularly and I am old enough to be your mother !
For all those haters , I had my baby at 38 and was conned out of my hard earned money by his dad. So good luck to all you perfect people making all the right decisions.
There is some really good practical advice on here OP, you have your whole life of you to make a go of it. You can do it x

@Loopytiles

Not everyone has the choice between "better paid" and NHS. At least in the NHS you are almost guaranteed a job! That is worth its weight in gold for many people. The job market is shit these days.

Threads like these make me so proud to be British. The empathy, understanding and compassion still shines on I see.

OP I get it, life isnt black and white and can pull the rug from under you. You'll get there eventually.

There for the grace of God go I. Most people are only 3 paycheques away from homelessness. I really feel for you OP.

One of the Labour manifesto pledges was the creation of a National Education Service to provide free, lifelong education opportunities for every person who needs them.

OP if you decide you want to work in the nhs in the future which we are desperate for! You can work as a care assistant and gain your nvq in health and social care which would be a foot up to getting on a nursing course. There are some shocking replies here yes you sound a tad bit dramatic but you are only 19 , I'm sure some of the posters here have children your age which is disgusting the way they have replied to you.

@churchandstate there are safety nets that allow young people to re-enter education under the current government. No, it is not as easy to do as it would have been prior to having children but it certainly is possible. There are grants and bursaries available, she will be eligible for help with childcare soon too.

You're right, there is no point berating her but she also needs to accept this is a consequence of her decision to have a child young. Most of us will have had to make sacrifices in one way or another to get ahead

OP there is a lot of harsh judgement on this thread. Yes you had a baby young but you both work and you want to provide a good future for your family. I hope you get the opportunity to go on and study especially if you want to work in the NHS. Can you get some careers advice? It might still be possible for you and maybe there will be incentives to come if there is to be a recruitment on nurses. If not maybe you should think of moving to Scotland, if you stay there three years beforehand then you won’t need to pay fees for uni and if it’s nursing you are interested in then you could get the nursing bursary- just an idea if you think otherwise education is closed to you!

My sister had a child very young. The father of the child vanished soon after the child arrived. She made use of the free childcare provided by the local college and did an access course when the child was a year old. It wasn't necessarily a course she wanted to do but it did give her the UCAS points to go on to further study.

Her child is now 3 and my sister has just started university - childcare is still free. Her course is only 3 days a week. It's not easy but it is possible. Don't give up hope.

addictedtochoc

It’s not inevitable that it should be as hard as it is. At all. A Labour government would have made it easier, and again, I don’t know what government is for if not to make it easier for people to better themselves and care for their families. 🤷🏻‍♀️

One of the Labour manifesto pledges was the creation of a National Education Service to provide free, lifelong education opportunities for every person who needs them.

churchandstate Ahh yes, another one of their pie in the sky promises that never would have happened.

Labour weren’t voted in because most people aren’t naive enough to actually think they could do even a quarter of all the pie in the sky promises they made.