To think this is selfish (nativity)

[LolaDabestest]

My child's nativity today, 2 showings morning and afternoon. My daughter had a decent part with lines...not showing off they started school as a shy quiet child so massive step for her and I wanted to get her part on my phone. Anyway got there 15 minutes early I'm never one of the saddos that arrives early to hog the front row I always just slink to the back.
Bare in mind I was 15 minutes early front row was filled and ended up having to slink to the back.
I looked along the front row and there was literally about 4 parents the rest were obviously extended family bit peeved but hey they obviously got there mega early I don't got time for that shit.

I had to stand at the back zooming in to get a vid of my child which was annoying but hey ho. Anyway my aibu is I later found out that the parents at the front mum, dad, two sets of grandparents had been to both the showings (4 hours apart) and took up half the front row in both shows!! Their child didn't have a speaking part(), it's really pissed me off tbh as they should have at least let other parents have a chance at being at the front to get some decent pics etc. And the fact that it was half their family as well.

Anyway I know I sound precious but without going into things this was a massive moment for my child and it would have been nice to actually have had a decent view and come away with a nice vid of her part.

YANBU - very selfish behaviour.

YANBU that was very selfish of them to take up the front row twice. I don't think it makes a difference though whether their kid has a speaking part or not - the point is that the kid knows you're there - whether they're a donkey in one scene or the star of the show.

I'm not sure I actually believe you. Unless your school hall is massive, it will surely be restricted to 2 tickets per child per performance, like any other.

You actually say you don't want to sit at the front, so what is your actual problem here?

Their child might not have had a speaking part, but they might have still been absolutely crippled with anxiety at the thought of standing in front of people, and their family being there could have given them the confidence to go on stage. You just don't know.

If you want a better seat, get there earlier. If you - as you say - didn't want to sit in the front row anyway, why have you made a thread about the people who did?

my aibu is did they really need to take the whole front row up for both showings

No they didn't, they were selfish and the teachers shouldn't have allowed it.

It's odd - my school had 2 tickets per family/one performance only and sold dvds for 3 quid. Cuts out a lot of hassle.
As a single mum who only used one of their ticket allocation I guess I could have haggled for seeing both but I am aware that numbers were tight. That said, you never know full circumstances of these things, perhaps their child needed support for both, perhaps it's a huge deal to them they made it onto the stage at all.
I was surprised at mine that a parent at the end of a row was asked if they could swap for a wheelchair and they refused and said the wheelchair could go next to them. I even offered for them to have my seat which was excellent view so that the wheelchair could be moved as requested and was told abruptly, no they were fine thanks.
Yes you might be fine love, but the gran in a wheelchair behind you that can neither see nor hear well clearly isn't.
Now that, that was selfish but I guess the woman was of the I got here first to sit in this seat brigade, like if asked to move on a plane or train but ye Gods, not moving for a disabled person is the height of bah humbug. The woman who had asked, very politely, was embarrassed. I also offered her MIL my seat obviously but it wasn't at the end of the row so not doable as could not take her out the wheelchair and she did not want to be wheeled next to the woman refusing to budge as it would have blocked the aisle.
I did wonder whether to cause a scene/call the woman out on it but the woman making the request seemed taken aback but wanting to drop it straight away. It was hardly cheeky fuckery on their part but major Scroogery on the woman being a selfish twunt.

YANBU! I blame school for not limiting with tickets, absolutely essential in my view. If not you get the world and his wife rocking up people have no common sense when it comes to these things. Pisses me off more when they reserve seat for other parents with a slightly sprained ankle or whatever the excuse, or worse still retired staff!. Queing is part and parcel of the Nativity. You have to queue to get a good seat. Not impressed with you having the 2yr old though OP another no no for me. Really annoying when you arrange childcare for your toddler only to finding you are sitting next to someone else with a shrieking child

I get that your aggrieved now, but in the big scheme of things this isn't important - your child will turn into a teenager and that is a whole new level of trauma

Of course some schools let parents video. I did just that on Monday. It was expressly permitted provided not posted to social media. It astonishes me how some people make such sweeping statements.

"that a parent at the end of a row was asked if they could swap for a wheelchair and they refused and said the wheelchair could go next to them."....if this parent got there early and queued for ages to get a good seat near to where their child was, I can understand them not wanting to move to possibly the back. Also, you dont know why that person wanted to keep their seat, they could have had disability reasons of their own. If the wheelchair user or their carer rang in advance, the school could have allocated a spot for them to go into. So I think it was cheekyfuckery on the part of the wheelchair user. Why did the school ask this one particular parent to move?

I always sat at the back anyway, because then you can stand up without getting in anyone else’s way. There are always badly behaved parents at these things.

YANBU. Taking up the front row for both performances was selfish. As are the parents who stand up blocking everyone's view to take photos or allow younger siblings to shout and create a racket throughout the play.

TabbyMumz Yes, we do know each other. Not well, but there's only one year group per performance so logically at least some of the people in the front row will be parents of children in the same class as your dc.

Unless your school hall is massive, it will surely be restricted to 2 tickets per child per performance, like any other.

None of my kids schools tickets the nativity or ban videos, and the school hall is not "massive". Schools only start issuing tickets when selfish idiots force them too.

My kids primary had a good system.
The nativity was done by the infants. Y2 pupils got the speaking parts and the first 2-3 rows were reserved for Y2 parents/family.
The summer production was done by the juniors with Y6 having the lead parts so, again, first 2-3 rows reserved for their parents.

Although, I appreciate it was a one class per year school.

But fink, that doesnt mean you will definitely know them? I rarely did school pick ups because I worked full time so never really knew the parents of kids in my childs class.

Having worked as a photographer for many years, I would advise you to live the moment to its full extent in real time, rather than viewing the event through a viewfinder.

My DC’s old school only allowed two tickets per family which I thought was a fair system. It doesn’t have to be a big family occasion, especially if the child doesn’t even have a speaking part.

Anyway, it’s not a massive deal really. You won’t really be bothered about this in a year.

YANBU that was a selfish move by them and rather excessive. Why should they get to see it twice but other people not at all? Too many people focus to excess on themselves and fail to consider others

"Why should they get to see it twice but other people not at all"
We dont know that this is the case. It might be that they used up their quota of tickets at the two showings. Or it might be that everyone who wanted to see it, saw it.

Could you not go there and you know, just WATCH your child without worrying about filming it on your phone etc?

At our schools nativity you got 2 tickets to one one show, no more no less. Extended family had no chance.

I can't get past the fact that they all turned up to both. Who wants to sit through their kids' nativity twice? I don't even want to go once..

I filmed her bit that's all to show her siblings as they hadn't all seen it.

I think it was selfish to hog the front row for both performances. YANBU

Speaking part or not, every child in the nativity is important. Someone has to sit at the back - your DD having a speaking role can’t guarantee you first row VIP spaces I’m afraid.