To think this is selfish (nativity)

[LolaDabestest]

My child's nativity today, 2 showings morning and afternoon. My daughter had a decent part with lines...not showing off they started school as a shy quiet child so massive step for her and I wanted to get her part on my phone. Anyway got there 15 minutes early I'm never one of the saddos that arrives early to hog the front row I always just slink to the back.
Bare in mind I was 15 minutes early front row was filled and ended up having to slink to the back.
I looked along the front row and there was literally about 4 parents the rest were obviously extended family bit peeved but hey they obviously got there mega early I don't got time for that shit.

I had to stand at the back zooming in to get a vid of my child which was annoying but hey ho. Anyway my aibu is I later found out that the parents at the front mum, dad, two sets of grandparents had been to both the showings (4 hours apart) and took up half the front row in both shows!! Their child didn't have a speaking part(), it's really pissed me off tbh as they should have at least let other parents have a chance at being at the front to get some decent pics etc. And the fact that it was half their family as well.

Anyway I know I sound precious but without going into things this was a massive moment for my child and it would have been nice to actually have had a decent view and come away with a nice vid of her part.

I agree. It's mean and selfish to sit on the front row twice. They should let someone else have a turn.

People can attend when they like. If the school thought it’d be a problem they’d issue tickets so you could only attend a certain performance

Janaih

Some schools do allow photos & videos they just ask for parents to be sensible and not put anything up on social media.

‘Saddos’ and ‘hogging’ for getting a place you wanted ( very confused by your voluntary/ enforced slinking to the back) .

Agree that nobody should be there for two identical performances of the same thing, but that sounds like a school admin/communication problem.

10story wasn't really doable as the seats were dotted on the other rows and I had my 2 year old so couldn't really sit in between a lot of people in case I needed to take her out etc

Our school lets us video so long as it's not shared on social media. Our school also allocated two tickets per child. Which can be split so one parent attends each session.

It's not Fair that those four people selfishly took those spots. I understand you're annoyed. Maybe make a polite suggestion to the head teacher to allocate a set number of seats per child.

First of all, I agree that one family taking up all the front room is selfish.

However, YABU because

• you call people bothered enough to queue up early a ‘saddo’
• your saying your child having a speaking park makes her more important. You won’t be saying that is she’s ‘just’ part of the chorus next year

Mmm I'm never one of those parents bragging about speaking parts but having 3 selectively mute children and never having a moment like this sorry but yes maybe I am a bit Braggy/proud. It's normally always the loud outspoken kids getting the main parts so made a change.

It’s the schools fault, parents shouldn’t be allowed to watch twice. But why didn’t you sit in the 2nd or 3rd row and why are people ‘saddos’ for getting there early. Odd attitude.

Anyway my aibu is I later found out that the parents at the front mum, dad, two sets of grandparents had been to both the showings (4 hours apart).

^So they watched it twice? Selfish people

What a mad thread - how do people read something, pick up on a tiny irrelevant point/say something clearly made up/ miss the entire point of everything just in order to jump on the bandwagon of criticising the OP. Total craziness.

OP - yes these people were very selfish, unfortunately lots of people are, especially at things involving children, they are incapable of thinking beyond their own interests. Sadly the unselfish people who try to be accomodating often miss out. I hope you managed to enjoy your DC's play despite the seat hoggers.

You don’t sound as though you like other people or their children much.

My ds and dil couldn't even get in the hall to see dgc as it's ticket only and they'd all been allocated when they tried to get some.
He was in the chorus singing so I think they just stood outside and listened.
I suspect some families had more than 2 tickets but that's life.

Our school lets us video so long as it's not shared on social media. Our school also allocated two tickets per child. Which can be split so one parent attends each session.

This is what we have at my kids school. It didn’t stop one set of parents bringing both sets of grandparents and hogging the second row. I was not impressed.

I definitely think the family at your daughter’s school shouldn’t have stayed in the front row for both performances. I know what you mean about feeling that parents should get priority over extended family. Rightly or wrongly I feel the same way.

I do think you have a bit of a funny attitude, why is it being a ‘Saddo’ to want to get a good view of your child. Which is exactly what you wanted. Next time don’t ‘slink to the back’ if you don’t want to have to zoom in to video her.

Sorry to hear you didn’t get there early enough to get a good seat.

My school have introduced a ticket system and capped numbers for this reason. For the first time ever I've had a decent view of both my children in their Christmas performances. Seems a bit extreme but it does seem to have worked.

I got fed up of this every year. The same grandparents on the front row for everything. It started in reception and lo and behold, finished at GCSE presentation last week.
Parents only the front half, regardless of role. Everyone else whose childrearing days are over, to the back.

We got there half an hour early for our son’s nativity and the whole church was full .

YANBU to be annoyed. I actually commented to my husband that I know it’s not a right or anything but it does grate that in our school, grandparents and parents not working (mainly mums with babies) show up mega early and bagsy all the seats. Then you’re left at the back not being able to see your own child.

What mad fuckers want to watch a nativity twice?!

Their child didn't have a speaking part()

That bit is irrelevant. Their child had a part in the show and they are just as entitled to feel proud and want to see them on stage. We try to teach our children that all parts are important.

they should have at least let other parents have a chance at being at the front

Yes, I agree they should have.

No school lets parents video in this day and age.

Yes they do. Lots do.

What is it about school activities that turn (some) parents into such.. err I don't even know what word I want. Twats. That's the one.

I remember going to see one of DCs nativity once (can't remember which DC). Got there suitably early and queued up. The school was mid expansion, but the building work to expand the church hadn't been completed. Probably an oversight on the schools part not to split performances/limit tickets etc. Anyway all parents had seats, squeezed in like sardines, but enough for us all.
Then part way into the performance a couple of families turned up late and stood in front of the seated parents (we were behind the children) so we couldn't see anything at all. That really did fuck me off.

Mind you I annoyed more than a few parents a couple of years later when I was one of the last parents to enter the church for an assembly and I walked straight to the front row and sat on the chair which had been 'saved' by a jacket. I heard mutterings of 'who does she think she is...' ' just because shes on the pta' etc etc.
Actually I was a student at the time, and a single parent. I had no computer or internet at home. Only my phone and limited data. So the Vicar let me use his office when I needed to. The deputy head realised I was in the office working hard so stuck his head in and told me he'd saved a chair for me at the front and to come in when the music started playing.

I have no idea if yabu or not though. I cant imagine why anyone would want to sit through a school nativity more than once. And other than that 1 year when we were mid build,our school have never needed to limit attendees or have multiple performances. No idea why.

It is a bit selfish to take up an entire front row twice, but it’s irrelevant that their child didn’t have a speaking part and yours did. Tbh, I think it’s more selfish to bring a two year old to a nativity performance, so you haven’t got a leg to stand on when it comes to criticising others in the the audience. If you’re bringing a toddler, the only place for you is by the door anyway.

Yanbu to complain they went twice and that their extended family took up extra seats.

Yabu to call people saddos and to say that it isn't as important to them to see the play as their child had a smaller part.

Saddos was meant in a jokey way as there are always the sane few the "coats" on the chair crew etc and by early I'm talking 30 minutes early hanging around outside which I do think is a bit extreme.

"there child wasn't a main part etc so they didn't need to seat in the front twice."

You've lost a lot of sympathy right there. A lot of kids never get speaking parts. Whatever part their child had, no doubt they were just as proud of their child as you were of yours. They got there first, they got the seat. 15 mins early is not early at all for this sort of thing. People start queuing about 45 mins before at our school. Obviously you werent early if you ended up at the back.

Our school used to do 4 showings, we always made sure someone was there for our child at each one, so quite often we went twice each. I only ever got to sit at the front once in about 10 years.
Anyway how on earth would you know if they were parents or extended family!?
Sitting at the front doesnt go hand in hand with your child having a good part.

I am soooo glad that my kids are at secondary and I don't have to deal with the bun fights that happen at any event that parents are invited to.

For what it's worth OP. I get you! The other families are perfectly entitled to attend twice (I sometimes used to) but they were so selfish to sit at the front both times.