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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Settle a disagreement: AIBU to leave this advent candle burning throughout December including when everyone is out or in bed?

285 replies

EasilyDistracted77 · 09/12/2019 06:45

Picture for context, the candle is inside the glass/metal case.

One of us is saying it's perfectly safe and that's what an advent candle is for. The other is saying a flame should never be left unattended, no matter how safe it seems.

Settle a disagreement: AIBU to leave this advent candle burning throughout December including when everyone is out or in bed?
OP posts:
Amortentia · 09/12/2019 09:10

I’m struggling to understand how an adult could possibly think this is a reasonable thing to do. I’d be seriously wondering about the cognitive functions of anyone who suggested this, no kidding.

Aren’t unattended candles one of the most common reasons for house fires?

GruciusMalfoy · 09/12/2019 09:10

OP, people like your DH are why we have to have "do not eat" printed on things like dishwasher tabs. What an eejit!

Apolloanddaphne · 09/12/2019 09:11

It is madness to leave a candle lit all night or when you are out of the house. Your DH needs to wake up to the dangers of this.

Billben · 09/12/2019 09:12

Absolutely not.

diddl · 09/12/2019 09:12

Ones that are meant to be lit & left, are they for Churches, outdoors in a lantern?

WheresMyChocolate · 09/12/2019 09:13

I know someone who lost everything last week. A secure candle wasn't as secure as she thought, the sofa next to it went up and now she and her son are homeless. She was home and awake at the time and still couldn't control it. Why you'd risk it while you and children sleep is beyond belief. Really stupid.

alig99 · 09/12/2019 09:14

Give your local Fire Brigade a call for advise! But be prepared for a big red truck to turn up and park out side your house!😮

Candlebarbara · 09/12/2019 09:14

House down my road burnt down a couple of years ago due to a candle left burning. Just dont risk it!

BlouseAndSkirt · 09/12/2019 09:15

To be honest I wouldn’t be happy with that set up even if I was in, especially if you have kids, a dog or a cat.

All it takes is for a draught caused by closing the door to cause some tinsel to fall on the glass, or the tree to get knocked over on to it and the whole thing goes up, or someone to tug on or trip on the other end of the (flammable-looking) snow rug..,

BertrandRussell · 09/12/2019 09:17

God, I hate a reverse!

LolaSmiles · 09/12/2019 09:18

OP, people like your DH are why we have to have "do not eat" printed on things like dishwasher tabs.
Grin

I can't believe anyone would intentionally leave a candle when asleep or out.

thetardis · 09/12/2019 09:19

Thank you! I cannot WAIT to show my husband your responses!

:D you got a rare unanimous one

Wilmalovescake · 09/12/2019 09:20

So that IS your house?
Take the candle off that bloody fake snow and tell your DH he’s an idiot.

Waspnest · 09/12/2019 09:24

Now I'm confused. So is it you OP who wants to leave it burning or your DH? I voted YABU on the basis it was you wanting to do something so stupid Confused

ChristmasCroissant · 09/12/2019 09:30

YABU to leave the candle burning all the time, it's meant to be burnt a bit each day to match the numbers - not decimated on the first day!

thecatsthecats · 09/12/2019 09:35

My Welsh grandmother lit a candle on Christmas Eve which was left to burn all over Christmas. It was a family tradition. It was on a candle holder, on a plate on a stone mantle piece with nothing else near.

Ooh, is this a Welsh thing?

We always used to light a candle for travellers on Christmas Eve, in a stone candle holder, in a deep recessed stone windowsill, and leave it just for midnight mass.

Would never purposefully blast through an advent candle though, that's just daft.

81Byerley · 09/12/2019 09:35

I had a beeswax candle in an Edwardian glass candlestick holder that had been used on numerous occasions . The candle had burnt down more quickly than I expected and I hadn't noticed. Suddenly there was a loud crack as the candlestick broke, and the end of the candle fell on to the rug. It would have been a disaster, even if I'd been in the loo for a minute, let alone in bed or out. Have a look at that holder. Is there a little label telling you it was made in China or Taiwan? If so, be even more wary. It doesn't look as if you should light that candle at all inside that box, anyway. And an Advent candle is to count down the days, so you burn it for a short time every day.

WhatsNextMrsLandingham · 09/12/2019 09:40

You have tinsel hanging that close to an open fire and you're asking about a candle? Ok then... Confused

ohdearmymistake · 09/12/2019 09:46

The photo is as an example NOT the op house, it's the op DH that's the idiot that wants to leave a fire hazard burning continually.

DoesntLeftoverTurkeySoupDragOn · 09/12/2019 09:46

My Welsh grandmother lit a candle on Christmas Eve which was left to burn all over Christmas. It was a family tradition. It was on a candle holder, on a plate on a stone mantle piece with nothing else near. We survived.

Yeah, when I was a kid we just sat in the back of a car with no seat belts or car seats. We survived... 🤔

WheresMyChocolate · 09/12/2019 09:48

You have tinsel hanging that close to an open fire and you're asking about a candle? Ok then...

OP said that the fire isn't real.

The photo is as an example NOT the op house

The OP disagrees with you.

Omashu · 09/12/2019 09:51

Of all the pointless questions to ask on mumsnet... 🙄

BlouseAndSkirt · 09/12/2019 09:54

Nowhere does the OP say that is not her house Confused

She said the fire in the grate is a poster.

But the tinsel (and other gubbins) could still fall on the candle holder and overheat or knock it over.

Wejustdontknow · 09/12/2019 09:57

I once caught a fire started by a candle in the home of a disabled person whilst waiting for a bus when something caught my eye and I realised it was a pair of curtains on fire, the speed at which it spread was amazing and I have never lit a candle since. My bus was late that day, if it wasn’t I suspect the lady I see frequently in her wheelchair may not be with us today as the disabled exit to her home would have been blocked by fire

fligglepige · 09/12/2019 09:59

I often roll my eyes about the drama here when anyone mentions candles, but I wouldn't leave that alone either.