Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask how I can show my face on Monday

391 replies

cadburyegg · 07/12/2019 09:40

I went to a works Christmas do last night, drank too much and made a tit of myself.
I’m dreading going to work on Monday! AIBU to hand my notice in?! I can’t see another solution!! Help!

OP posts:
Sagradafamiliar · 07/12/2019 17:17

Oh, everyone farts on nights out (not me though, no of course not) Bars and pubs used to reek of fags before the smoking ban, now they smell like trumps! Granted, I don't hang around in the finest of establishments.

The cringiest people are the ones who go on about their antics afterwards like they're such legends. The 'I'm MAD, me!' ones.

Rhubarb01 · 07/12/2019 17:20

This doesn't sound so bad OP. Private puking isn't likely to offend anyone much, if they even realise it happened. As for the accidental fart, a colleague of mine farted in the office the other day whilst sitting in her chair. She murmured "Ooh pardon me," and we all ignored it. I hadn't given it another thought until now. Chances are, the rest of your table were pretty drunk anyway when it happened. It always seems worse in our own imaginings and, as others have said, far worse things probably happened with other people that you don't even know about yet!

SlightlyBonkersQFA · 07/12/2019 17:23

Style it out. Say I remember you lot getting a bit boisterous too

JingsMahBucket · 07/12/2019 17:25

@Noeuf YANBU. I’m always aghast at these Christmas party threads. I’m not from the UK and this wouldn’t be the norm where I’m from. If you work maybe in finance or legal, possibly but on the whole, no. And all the puking, shitting yourself or stripping naked? No fucking way, not even in those professions. Puking from drinking past the age of 25 is seen as not having your shit together and not knowing how to drink properly, let alone middle aged managers like the people commenting here mention. Making out or having sex with your colleague, fine, but we’d be way the hell more discreet about it. Go find a secret corner or just take an early taxi back to somebody’s place.

And to echo a PP, I’d hate to work in hospitality and have to clean up some of these literal shit messes from grown ups who just couldn’t wait until appetizers were served before having 5 glasses of free wine. WTF? Grim.

SummerPavillion · 07/12/2019 17:26

I personally believe farts (are always funny and) should be less of a faux pas than they are. Not polite exactly, but more on the burp level.

SlightlyBonkersQFA · 07/12/2019 17:27

Also
, you can control the narrative a bit

"Because i normally behave so impeccably, yall are shocked!?".

"Because im such a moderate drinker, On the rare occasion i overdo it, it causes a scene".

Acknowledge it, but in the context of it being SO out of character!

bigchris · 07/12/2019 17:38

I got up at the table and farted in front of everyone about half way through the meal

ShockShock

Molly2016 · 07/12/2019 17:43

I have a colleague who puked all over the cocktail bar and then called our boss a fucking wanker.
Next day HR sent an email saying no one was allowed to talk about it 😂
I still don’t know why or what the repercussions were for her. It was all very hush hush.

Solitaryradiator · 07/12/2019 17:50

@Solitaryradiator

At one of my Xmas parties a woman offered varying and numerous people a blow job then passed out in the toilet and shit herself. You’ll be alright

shock Did she come back to work after? That would be a definite emigration for me!

Oh yeah. And then left and is now really senior at another company. I work in a forgiving industry...

StrayWoman · 07/12/2019 18:11

You're fine OP. Farts are hilarious.

Someone puked on the floor then slipped over in it at ours last year.

PrincessHoneysuckle · 07/12/2019 18:22

I've had many an eventful work do.Im going to mine at relatively new workplace on Saturday,luckily the bosses arent going so win win .

yumscrumfatbum · 07/12/2019 18:34

I suspect most people will have found it funny, others will be relieved it was you and not them. It'll soon be old news OP

whatsinthebagwhatcoulditbe · 07/12/2019 18:37

A woman at my work got so drunk that she did a shit in the office lift. She also masturbated in a taxi in front of another female colleague who was escorting her home (to her parents' house).

Seven years on, she's still there, still getting blackout drunk at every party. If she can hold her head up I'm sure you can!

SlightlyBonkersQFA · 07/12/2019 19:37

Im feeling embarrassed about how early i left my christmas party. Got all dressed up, tried to mingle, couldnt hear anybody properly. I snook my coat off a stool and snook off like i was just going to the loo at 9.30
Im embarrassed now.

Roselilly36 · 07/12/2019 19:44

Doesn’t sound bad? No way would it show myself at work if it had vomited and farted! Call in sick.

churchandstate · 07/12/2019 19:51

Don’t forget, OP, you may have been plastered but everyone else will have been well on their way. They’ll all be sitting at home thinking about what they did, not what you did. Go in on Monday and brazen it out.

churchandstate · 07/12/2019 19:52

A woman at my work got so drunk that she did a shit in the office lift. She also masturbated in a taxi in front of another female colleague who was escorting her home (to her parents' house).

I’m pretty unshockable but that’s Shock

Slothkin · 07/12/2019 20:06

After posting the Kingsley Amis thing and reading some of the following posts, I’d like to be clear the worst things I did were to insist a cocktail could be made from two kinds of gin and fall over. I did once max out the ‘behind the bar’ tab on champagne with another colleague but we were the only ones left standing and thought a bottle of bubbly was pretty legit after pouring everyone else into cabs!

category12 · 07/12/2019 20:13

No way would it show myself at work if it had vomited and farted! Call in sick.

How on earth would that help? She will still need to go in to work the day after, or day after that. Far better to go in as soon as possible, get it over with, face everyone and brazen it out. If she doesn't go in, people will talk about her in her absence and it'll still be there to face.

Pumpkinandpeas · 07/12/2019 20:21

Not half as bad as 2 fellow colleagues taking cocaine at the Christmas meal. One got sacked one didn't. 80% of the others were really drunk. I snuck off early and went to bed stone cold sober.

GoodDogBellaBoo · 07/12/2019 20:21

If you get the chance please read Cecelia Ahern’s short story in the book Roar, about how we’ve all had that cringe moment where we say something or do something, and we literally want the ground to swallow us up and in this instance it does. There’s that great big welcoming black hole in the floor and she jumps in and finds she’s not alone down there.. Since I read it I am ashamed of almost nothing. It’s absolutely brilliant. Smile

Original poster
cadburyegg · 07/12/2019 20:21

Oh god it never would have occurred to me to phone in sick... I’m even more worried now!!

OP posts:
TackyTinsel · 07/12/2019 20:27

Definitely don’t call in sick! That’s so obvious. Front it out, OP! It’s really not that bad.

freda123 · 07/12/2019 20:30

I went a works for about 8 years ago, got totally smashed and ended up launching myself off a table top onto the managing directors back (Tony) shouting, 'we love you Tony, we DOOOO' at the top of my voice. Then proceeded to demonstrate a pole dance for the entire work force (I'm not a pole dancer I just found a broom handle and improvised)
Safe to say I almost DIED the next day and when Monday swiftly came round I was hauled into the office for a stern word.
I didn't get the sack but the humiliation was worse

TackyTinsel · 07/12/2019 20:33

Hahahaaaa!@ 'we love you Tony, we DOOOO'