How do I tell work about my period? (Quick help needed)

[limecello]

I started my period during the night and honestly, I must be having the worst period of my iife - the first day is always bad but not usually to this extent. My muscle walls in my bum and lower back are periodically cramping (every 10 mins) so violently it's actually made me scream out loud. I've also been sick (sometimes happens) which has given me a bloody awful headache. Still retching but luckily I didn't eat much last night due to nausea.

I was hoping to pull myself together and get into work for 10...not happened. I've been up since 5 and don't know what to do.

I've just started working for a big company and am literally the only woman on my team (hardly any in my dept either) - I don't know if I feel comfortable telling my boss I'm having period pain. I don't want to use my period as an excuse I'm genuinely suffering.

Please advise what you would do.

Concurring with others - see your GP, push for a referral to a gynaecologist with Endo expertise. It does run in families.

You should not be suffering disabling pain to the extent you cannot work - stress this to the GP, including that your job is at risk due to the disabling pain.

If they won't refer you then see another GP and ask for another opinion.

Endo is notoriously under diagnosed, especially in younger women and it can affect fertility.

as everyone has said go back to the Dr and demand action, my fertility Dr said flooding, changing more than every few hours is not normal and extreme pain is not normal, dont let anyone tell you it is

also because you are home, sounds odd but try anyway, remove the tampon and just use pads, double up if you need to, sometimes having those muscles relaxed helps too, get some heat packs and use across your lower belly and if you have another put it on your lower back

See the GP, my friend had exactly this and was diagnosed with endo quite a few years later!

I used to puke with every period when I was younger (I have pcos), and have excruciating pain - I hear ya! Talk to your doc.

What are the absence triggers at your work? I've worked at places that routinely got rid of staff that had two periods of absence in their probation period...

OP maybe your boss hasn’t replied because he hasn’t actually checked emails yet - which is why a phone call is really the only way to inform work of your absence. Hope you feel better soon and get that GP appointment sorted.

Acupuncture regulated my periods and stopped flooding. Expensive but I didn’t want to take drugs. Hope you feel better soon OP. You should not be this ill with a natural bodily function.

Oh also OP if you are concerned about discussing this with your male team do you have a HR department?

Make them aware of the situation so that you don't appear to be having random absences. They can't fix it but its reasonable to express concerns about discussing this with a new male team. Our HR team's common complaint is that people don't make them aware of health/other issues so that they can't say "we have this registered as a legit issue".

"Women talk about the impact of period pain at work
More than half of women workers have experienced period pain that affects their ability to work, according to a survey for BBC Radio 5 live’s Emma Barnett programme.

Of those, nearly a third have been forced to take a day or more's leave.

Emma Barnett set up a confessional booth to allow women to speak anonyously about their experience of period pain at work.

One said: “At work, some people think ‘there’s that crazy hormonal lady’. You don’t want to be perceived in that way.”

The survey of over 1,000 women, conducted by YouGov, also showed that only 27% tell their boss that period pain is responsible. Common reasons given instead are headaches, stomach pains, colds or flu and medical appointments."

^ Link doesn't seem to be working but this is the blurb from the episode of BBC Radio 5 live "in Short" introductory page that tackles this very issue.

Endometriosis is the second most common gynaecological condition in the uk, affecting 1.5 million women (the same number of women as are affected by diabetes).

According to Endometriosis UK it takes on average 7.5 years to be diagnosed in the UK.

My daughter cannot take nsaids at all, never mind early, because of their adverse effect on her stomach (owing to which she ended up in a& e twice) so getting the right treatment is not always as easy as people are saying!

People generally, and employers and GPS in particular, need to be more aware.

Trying link again here

limecello, it sounds absolutely horrendous, but you do need to make sure you do something about this.

You need to get to your GP and get treatment.

It is your first job out of uni, not sure if you are aware if you are off even 3 times in one rolling 12 month period companies can come down hard invoking disciplinary proceedings, you are at risk of this as a new start < 2 years service you have few right and they can ask you to leave at anytime.

Let HR know and show them you are doing everything possible to find a solution to reduce any time off.

Tried ringing boss no answer :/ Just looked up his schedule and he's in meetings all day. Anxiety is through the roof, wish I just went in now.

This kind of pain is not acceptable.

PLEASE stop living with it and get a GP appointment.

If your boss isn’t available can you ring HR. Tell them your boss is in meetings and you aren’t sure how to inform them of a sickness absence if he isn’t available.

The problem is that really bad periods IS a very good reason not to go - same with a real migraine. They are a killer (and you shouldnt' have to put with either)

but
I really couldn't go to work with the cold - I was sneezing all over the place and disgustingly phlegmy. Would have grossed people out. is NOT a valid reason to stay home, at least you should show your face! Even if it's a food place or a medical centre and they send you home because of it.

By calling sick for minor reasons, you force people not to take you seriously.

I would just say what the problem is. The male gang will just have to get used to it.

You would have thought that this 'ere peroid business would have bene known about now, but it still seems to most blokes that its some sort of un discussed alien affliction wouldn't you?

What isn't in boys sex ed these days they they don't explain periods so they KNOW what is going on?, makes me wonder if any of them had girlfriends or perhaps there're all gay;?..

Hope you feel better soon and see if you can get somehting that impoves it a bit for you limecello:)

www.endometriosis-uk.org/publications have a workplace leaflet which is really helpful for employers and can help explain what’s going on.

If it does turn out to be endo^. Or is there a PCOS charity? They might have something.

I was off a month ago due to a very bad cold so feel like work may think I'm taking the piss

Are you taking the piss? No?.....Then why worry they will think you are?
I find it depressing that people feel guilty about being sick.
There is something wrong with an employer if they are going to be difficult about you being ill!
As an adult, you should be able to say you are too ill to come into work and that be accepted.

When you go to see your GP about your periods, it will be helpful if you can give details of your symptoms, such as:

• flow (measured by how often you have to change tampon/pad/menstrual cup, including which size you use, and whether you double up, e.g. tampon and pad.)
• any flooding
• any clotting, including rough size of clots. (I have a vague memory of reading something which said anything over the size of a 50p piece counts as a large clot.)
• any náusea and vomiting
• any faintness or actual fainting
• any headaches
• any other pain, including location (e.g. lower back, breasts, thigh, knees) and severity
• any medication you take, including type, dose, frequency, effectiveness
• any premenstrual symptoms
• also general stuff like how frequent they are, and how long they last
• any other relevant info e.g. In some women, periods can trigger migraines

Good luck.

Have you tried ibuprofen? I find it's the only thing that takes the pain away when I randomly have severe period pain. I know the type you mean, it has made me vomit too, just from the intense pain. It usually takes an hour for it to work for me, an hour of pure agony, but then once the ibuprofen kicks in I'm ok, then I just keep it topped up for 24 hours.

You really have two choices:

1. Take maximum medication for whatever is wrong with you (max cold & flu tablets/lozenges; migraleve for pain including sickness; etc) and still struggle in to work.

Or

1. Call in sick and stay home to REST, not stress.

Personally, I always go to work unless I am literally incapable of doing any of my job.

I'm sorry you're so anxious op. I'm sure work will be fine. Even if they do think anything bad, the worst case scenario is they think something bad. You can prove them wrong.

In the meantime, get to your gp when you can. My periods used to be like yours. I had transexamic acid and mefenamic acid...I've probably spelled both of those wrong but they really helped. The pill never agreed with me and I tried lots of different types.

Glad you’ve made the decision for yourself OP. I think it was your own comments about the friend ending the friendship if you didn’t go that made some of us go a bit about her. I had no idea if she had children or not TBH, don’t know about anyone else!

Oops, posted this on the wrong thread sorry!

And get to the dr. There is medication you can take before your period starts that will stop it being so heavy and painful.

Your period symptoms sound severe, have you spoken to your gp to see if you possibly have Endometriosis?