....to think that going on UC would be better than going back after maternity leave?

[TheDelorean81]

Long time lurker but this is my first post so please be nice to me :)

Basically I don’t know what to do. My little boy is two months old and I’ve starting to look at what will happen when I go back to work next spring. After costing up childcare in the area I’m in I’d basically be paying to go back! We’d lose my entire income from the family pot.

My partner works different shifts each week so finding a different job to work around his so we can share childcare is out of the question.

My question is this. Would I be unreasonable to go on Universal Credit for a year (ish) until the free childcare element kicks in and I can afford it? Or until my partner can find a better job to support us? Or until I can find a better job that works? My family and my partners family are all saying I should (they’re all very high earners and reckon I’m should make use some of their taxes....not sure what to say to that!), but I just feel that it’s not what benefits are there for?

But in the same vein I’m struggling to see another option.

Anyone else here with personal experience?

@Daisy7654 we’ll all just quit work then shall we and claim ‘what we’re entitled to’ oh hang on wait, if we did that whose tax would fund the welfare system? What a stupid entitled comment to make. No one is entitled to benefits, they are there for those genuinely in need at that time. Not a lifestyle choice because you don’t want to work and suck up the childcare costs like the rest of us have to.

Nurseries are mostly awful
Really? How so? Are all kids who've gone to nursery doomed to be emotionally damaged, ruining their future life and career?

I wonder how many doctors who have treated your kids the teachers who educate them have been poor souls left into nurseries by cruel parents who opted to work!

I really wish those who opted to be sahm admitted that they do it because it suits them.

@Parker231
Her career position is a min wage job!
But nevertheless if you have a profession you can normally step back in, years later. Your point is a myth.

And just to add amazing the number of mother's who think nurseries are so awful suddenly think there are wonderful places when they get free hours and opt for the 15 free hours when baby 2 comes about and they are still at home!

@Daisy7654
Probably the most stupid comment I’ve seen on here. If every new mum took this position then the economy would go to complete shot. The country can not afford for all women to quit working as soon as they have children and just claim UC.

Also peeled do not perpetuate the myth that it is easy for women to re enter the work force after years off especially if they are in a non specialised role like the OP is. I am not demeaning OP’s job in a call centre but it’s a job that can be done by almost anyone so it won’t be sitting waiting for her when she decides to return to work.

@Dontdisturbmenow I agree with you completely.

*please

do it.

unless you have a mortgage and a single mum...who gets fuck all from the state help wise

rent gets paid(most of it at leasst)! its shit

There's no end of mine wage jobs. They don't go any lower. No offence OP btw.

And if we're calling each other names I think your all very STUPID too. So there.
Not OP though.

And if we're calling each other names I think your all very STUPID too. So there.
Not OP though.

You're

Sorry but I agree with @strawberrieshortcake and as someone who recruits professionals I can tell you there is a lot of concern surrounding hiring anyone who has been out of the workplace for a substantial amount of time.

I agree it doesn’t matter so much in low paid roles but you shouldn’t spread untruths, women might listen to you

Of course you should go back to work. Take the temporary hit in finances, keep yourself employed and earning, earning NI/pension etc and look for better work options if still needed.

You and your partner also need to have the very belated discussion you should have had a year or more ago about how to structure your family finances with a child.

OP, ignore the nasty replies and do what works best for you.

If you claim child benefit that goes towards your NI contributions anyway, I spent 4 years as a SAHM and will still be entitled to my full state pension. If it exists by the time I retire of course.

Much rather be home with my little one than paying some-one else to raise him

what a nasty comment and dig at working mothers. both of my DC went to nursery. But still I raised them. nobody else. Earning a living to house and feed them is part of raising a child, you know?

I wouldn't be bothered if OP did this, she's hardly planning on claiming for decades, it's just a temporary bit of help she needs.

I don't understand why evryone gets so bitter about it. It's the system that's wrong, not the OP, it's like it's designed to make things difficult if you have a baby. And the UK birth rate is below replacement level, which is a problem for us as what do we do about an aging population if we don't have enough young people? Reducing the population is good environmentally, but a nosediving birth rate (ie if only those who are independently wealthy and can definitely afford it had children) would be a social care disaster.

OP, ignore the nasty replies and do what works best for you.

Absolutely. Do ignore those working mothers who help to enable you to not go back to work

Daisy7654
And if we're calling each other names I think your all very STUPID too. So there.

Did you stamp your feet when you posted that? You sound about 12

OP, if you didn't plan and ensure you had sufficient savings to fund you staying at home then you should be going back to work. If you think your under 20 years of working would even begin to cover you receiving benefits from choice you are wrong.

I wouldn't go back, and didn't. All mine are in school now, and i think they need a SAHM more than ever, there are so many nativities / plays / sports days / parents lunches. Plus if you aren't around in the day it's a lot harder to socialise with other mums from the playground, and that's important otherwise your kids miss out socially.

I would hardly be any better off working than on TCs, and I'd be running myself ragged. Being a SAHM mean I can volunteer in school as well.

I'm shocked so many see this as an acceptable option. I hope the Tories sort this out when they get back into government in the 12th.

@ChloeDecker yes, because funnily enough, OP doesn't need permission from strangers on the internet. That's not how claiming UC works.

she's hardly planning on claiming for decades, it's just a temporary bit of help she needs

I know several women who planned to be SAHM for "a year or two" or "just until the DC start school" but are still SAHM years later. Either they've lost confidence and gotten used to being at home so the prospect of going back terrifies them or they desperately want to go back but no one will employ them due to the gap in their employment.

Plus if you aren't around in the day it's a lot harder to socialise with other mums from the playground

Yes, I'm thrilled to be working hard so that my taxes can facilitate the social lives of SAHM's

MinisterforCheekyFuckery It must give you a very nice warm feeling to know that you are working hard to pay for other woman to enhance their social life by meeting up with other mothers at the playground.

My partner works different shifts each week so finding a different job to work around his so we can share childcare is out of the question.

This is your real issue. Your partner is equally responsible for childcare. Childcare requirements don't disappear when a child reaches school age they just change. Unless you want to be doing crappy minimum wage jobs forever I suggest your partner starts looking for work that will allow him to do his share of childcare whilst allowing to pursue a career of your own.