....to think that going on UC would be better than going back after maternity leave?

[TheDelorean81]

Long time lurker but this is my first post so please be nice to me :)

Basically I don’t know what to do. My little boy is two months old and I’ve starting to look at what will happen when I go back to work next spring. After costing up childcare in the area I’m in I’d basically be paying to go back! We’d lose my entire income from the family pot.

My partner works different shifts each week so finding a different job to work around his so we can share childcare is out of the question.

My question is this. Would I be unreasonable to go on Universal Credit for a year (ish) until the free childcare element kicks in and I can afford it? Or until my partner can find a better job to support us? Or until I can find a better job that works? My family and my partners family are all saying I should (they’re all very high earners and reckon I’m should make use some of their taxes....not sure what to say to that!), but I just feel that it’s not what benefits are there for?

But in the same vein I’m struggling to see another option.

Anyone else here with personal experience?

@crispysausagerolls that's really lovely to hear...in my support group there are no success stories, and honestly I'd never heard of some-one personally past stage 3 conceiving naturally. It's good to hear....but I think my hands are full with this little monkey for now. One and done

@StealthMama and now I'm going to retrain to go back to that shitty job and progress further up the shitty career ladder.

What exactly is the point you're trying to get to, besides trying to insult me in a subtle enough way that you won't get your post deleted by MNHQ?

OP you are so convinced that everything you say and do is right, you don’t want to listen to any other views.
Very annoying & frustrating. I’m not sure why you posted.

@Pomegranatepompom what exactly haven't I listened to?

I. Am. Getting. A. Better. Job. To. Pay. For. My. Child.

I can only say this so many times....but by a lot of people's mentality here I should just stay in a job which I'd pay to work at...so lose money and have to claim childcare costs on UC....COMING OUT OF YOUR TAXES.

Or train to get a better job.

I'm getting a better job. I'm still getting flamed.

There's nothing in my posts or opinion that warrants deletion OP.

But we are back to the goadiness that so many on here don't like.

You believe that things are going to be so easy for you once you've retrained and that you are entitled to take this time out.

Therein lies the problem. You started this thread saying you didn't believe it's what's benefits were for, and majority agreed with you.

Then you told us all to get stuffed.

Have you looked into the money you get back with childcare similar to childcare vouchers??

Might be worth having a look and playing around with figures for example I work 3 days a week and my DD goes to nursery 3 days and the government help with nursery so for every £8 I pay nursery you get £2 back it's tax free childcare it's called.

Could you go back part time instead of full time or not?

I think you are underestimating that it’s hard being a full time working mum. Sahm is much much easier. Simply because you are in your own schedule and have the time.

And you are going from sahm back into a job that you used to hate! I really don’t see that lasting.

FWIW I’ve been a sahm, part time and full time working mum. But I’ve only worked in jobs I’ve enjoyed since being a mum (although unfortunately not the best paid, but more than min wage so my income does make a substantial difference to my family)

But I couldn’t imagine working a difficult, stressful job I hated and then fitting in my parenting and housework in after doing it.

I think you need to look for another possible plan.

Your posts are goady and I as advised I am in similar position job wise, call centre job, slightly above minimum wage though.. the kind of job you says takes no brain power.. get stuffed @TheDelorean81!! At least I work for my taxes and I haven’t quit that job to claim benefits!! I would rather go part time and train for a better job and still pay the necessary childcare than quit altogether to claim UC for 12 months!

You are in your late 30’s and I am in my middle 20’s and have my second child on the way and I am clearly more mature than you. My DP and I own a mortgage and both work full time, juggling the nursery runs between us and yes it would be easier to quit work but we don’t see it as an entitlement as we are both fit to work!! If we decided for me to quit work after DC number 2 it will be because we will live on one wage rather than claim from the struggling government.

You are not coming off as a very nice considerate person at all OP! And you are living in dreamland if you think that you shouldn’t be getting flamed for your entitled, stabbing a caged bear attitude! You may as well be trying to annoy hundreds of the MN posters with your responses!

You’ve certainly infuriated me!

And do not thank you everyone that is working their arses of and paying loads in taxes and not seeing their children for possibly days on end... That is goady and very very antagonising!

Your child is 2 months old for god sake & you’ve already quit and put your claim in for UC! Don’t expect people to believe it is because you want to avoid nursery fees.. more like you love being at home and want to sit on your arse all day.

And I don’t believe for a second that you are going to retrain and get a higher paying job.. you’ll probably stay on UC for years because “you’ll wait for them to be at school age” etc etc.. more like you just like being a lady of leisure but without the funds to fund it yourself!

Gosh @Mammabee20....I really hope you don't get as angry at everything else in life as you do at total strangers on the internet.

Done with this thread....in fact I've no idea why I'm still here. Peace out people....you've all been smashing good fun.

This thread is why I’m voting Conservative
Good luck OP

@ElleDubloo I don’t know if you’re being facetious about that but if you’re genuinely voting that way because of this thread or perceptions that this is widespread, please think again. I get the strong reaction (I posted upthread about how I’m pretty much the leftiest person ever but good lord this thread tested me) but by voting Tory, you’re screwing over every single person who needs the welfare state for any reason.

Ermm it annoys me because I go out to work along with everyone who says that YOU are being unreasonable and I have a little one at home too! I went back to work after a year full time.. be it only for 6 months until my DS is born but still.

I didn’t after two months of my DD being born that think ooo I’m going to be a grabby entitled so and so and quit my job and claim benefits because I think I can.

So pray tell what makes you think you are better qualified to stay at home and parent full time than every other mum on a parent advice site?

You know you are being unreasonable.. you shouldn’t have responded in the first place telling everyone what your decision was because you knew it was going to be the less popular answer.

Most people on mumsnet if they are told they are being unreasonable.. might make the decision too do what they wanted anyway but they don’t rub it in everyone’s faces like you do.

And yet again your you’ve all been good fun is another haha fck you all comment!
That is why I’m annoyed.

I think you're being very naive about how easy it will be to return to your old career (emotionally rather than practically). You hated it so much 10 years ago you quit and went to work minimum wage. Imagine that but add in the fact it takes you away from your child, gives you lest time to do all the daily shit we all have to do and overall makes life just a bit more complicated. Its fucking hard. I think you're dreaming if you think the fact it pays well is enough to make it worth it.

OP has not been rude at all.
As OP has been in a higher paid and a minimum wage job I doubt she'll have much difficulty returning to work when she chooses to.

All this 'can't imagine not wanting to work'. Well I can't imagine not wanting to be with my little ones .... they are little for so short a time as it is. And with the best will in the world, a nursery setting is not going to give them the same love and attention that a sahp or gp could.

Honestly Op you’ve signed up for hell, Universal credits is an awful system. Good luck, you’re gonna need it after the horror stories I’ve heard irl. You are gonna wish you kept your job.

OP I think you're really going to struggle going back into your previous job. I've been in a job I hate (and paid really well) and gave it up to do a job I loved but paid just above minimum wage. I've now gone down the training route so I can progress in the job I love. However, if training to move up wasn't an option for me, I'd still rather be in the low paid job than go back to my old one. It's so difficult to leave your child at home to go and do a job you hate. Not everyone has to earn tonnes of money. Paying childcare and working for nothing (as you see it) will be hard but it won't last forever and it'll be a whole lot easier than trying to leave your DC for your old job.

ferrier

I can’t imagine not wanting to be with my little one either...and I would make untold sacrifices financially to do so...EXCEPT GO ON FUCKING UC WHICH IS NOT MY OWN MONEY WHEN I COULD GET A JOB.

What the fuck is wrong with people

If you want to be a SAHM - fine but don’t expect the state and tax payers to support you.

Absolutely agree crispy I cried the morning I left for work but I did it to enable a better life, it’s a massive struggle to manage childcare as we have no family near us, but we adjusted work hours so they are in childcare 2 days a week. People who work make enormous sacrifices too, this I’m sacrifice money by not working to spend time with my baby but applying for UC just grates !

I think everyone should do what is best for themselves, when it comes to financial dealings with the government, as long as they stay within the law. If other people don't like what they're doing, don't have a go at people for doing what the law entitles them to do, tell your MP you want the law changed.

Having got that out the way, my real reason for posting: I would like to know what's gone wrong with UC in this case? Because the fundamental rule of UC was supposed to be that you are never better off financially by not working.

Is it that UC underestimates childcare costs?

I hope OP can come back to answer this one question, even though it's only to satisfy my idle curiosity.

Having got that out the way, my real reason for posting: I would like to know what's gone wrong with UC in this case? Because the fundamental rule of UC was supposed to be that you are never better off financially by not working.

I believe that those having children under 2 or 3 have special dispensation, but I'm not sure.

@EntropyRising in this case the OP will only consider nursery's in walking distance that she quotes as £1500 per month . Although later she mentions having enough money to keep running her car.

What you say is true, but not applicable to this OP, she just doesn't want to go back to work.

I'm not defending the OP, but rather suggesting one reason to the question 'why is the OP not better off in work', which is ostensibly the aim of UC.