....to think that going on UC would be better than going back after maternity leave?

[TheDelorean81]

Long time lurker but this is my first post so please be nice to me :)

Basically I don’t know what to do. My little boy is two months old and I’ve starting to look at what will happen when I go back to work next spring. After costing up childcare in the area I’m in I’d basically be paying to go back! We’d lose my entire income from the family pot.

My partner works different shifts each week so finding a different job to work around his so we can share childcare is out of the question.

My question is this. Would I be unreasonable to go on Universal Credit for a year (ish) until the free childcare element kicks in and I can afford it? Or until my partner can find a better job to support us? Or until I can find a better job that works? My family and my partners family are all saying I should (they’re all very high earners and reckon I’m should make use some of their taxes....not sure what to say to that!), but I just feel that it’s not what benefits are there for?

But in the same vein I’m struggling to see another option.

Anyone else here with personal experience?

.....so you look at other childcare options don't you....

Have you looked for higher paying work? Has your partner? Have you looked for cheaper accommodation? Have you looked at living in an area where things are cheaper?

No? Just claim, that's what everyone else does, right? Then come back to Mumsnet and complain when you can't get a GP appointment for 3 weeks, or when they cut universal credit and you 'lose' what your entitled to, or when they cut 15hrs free child care and increase the age of state pension eligibility because money doesn't fucking grow on trees??!

Jesus.

@StealthMama

1. no childminders with availability in walking distance of my house, or who are willing to pick up/drop off. No family to take him, which leaves nursery.

2. Right now I am not qualified for anything else. I hope to change this in my year out.

3. I pay £750 a month for a one bedroom in Surrey. If you can find cheaper....please, show me. I'd gladly move.

people don't need to agree to support a sahm. That's not how it works

Well clearly not, no. Would be interesting to see on a poll how many people would actually be happy for their taxes to go to that though. Doesn’t even sound like OP really wants to be at home anyway!

YANBU stay at home with your baby you won't regret it.

Why are some people being so mean? The benefit system is there to support those in need, what we should be complaining about is the extortionate coat of childcare!
OP I would advise you to go back to work and start looking for a better one while working, a long career break will make it harder for you to go back later.

You had some of my sympathy until you said it’s easier to go back to work. Sometimes it is, sometimes it really isn’t. Especially with the attitudes that us working mothers are allowing others to raise our children.

I blame the system on the whole but agree we have a nation of entitled people believing they always have the back up plan to do what they want. And sadly it’s the immigrants who get the blame but It really isn’t.

I'd at least go back part time so you're not totally in the shit if your relationship breaks down. Imagine if he cheated or turned abusive or you fell out of love and you couldn't leave because you had no income.

I also wouldn't rely on handouts from our country at this time. God knows what will happen.

OP you said @MynameisJune not if I have to pay for the privilege, nope.

Thing is, WE are paying for you NOT to work. You may look at it as working for nothing but I spend nearly half my working hours “working for nothing” because nearly half my pay goes on income tax. And I would rather that money went to someone who really needed it, like a disabled person.

Benefits should be for those who have no other choice, not those who just don’t much like their other choice.

...and Income from your dp, no point dripping feeding. I guarantee if I had all of your information and actually knew you in real life I'd find a solution better than you going on welfare.

Be resourceful. You really come across as 'woes me on a minimum wage job left with no choice'. It's bullshit.

I'm really glad that with health problems you managed to have a baby. But you need to step up for him. Free money will not always be there and there already isn't enough.

Would be interesting to see on a poll how many people would actually be happy for their taxes to go to that though.

I don't think that would be interesting at all.

Yes because the real reason the country’s social welfare system, NHS, schooling is fucked is because of minimum wage workers claiming UC, not down to the exploits of rampant corporations and politically driven austerity. Because we should all cultivate a ‘work ethic’ and be ‘socially responsible’, say the same people who couldn’t give a crap about tax evasion when it’s done by the rich.

1. no childminders with availability in walking distance of my house, or who are willing to pick up/drop off. No family to take him, which leaves nursery.

Why would the childminder need to pick up and drop off from you, that's not the norm at all, childminders May pick up/drop off to schools but parents usually take them in.

2. Right now I am not qualified for anything else. I hope to change this in my year out.

You said you're in late 30s and were working a call centre job where you sat and did nothing all day. What makes you think you're going to be able to complete retraining that will enable you to get a better paid job while looking after an infant/toddler? You never did it when you had nothing else to occupy your time. In my experience as a hiring manager, a qualification obtained means very little until you have demonstrated in a working environment that you can apply the knowledge covered in the quality. You are unlikely to see a salary increase immediately, you will probably need to work a low paid role initially.

@Lycidas literally don't think anyone on this thread has said that. Literally no-one.

@stealthmama Someone on the last page was saying ‘well don’t complain about 3 week waits at the NHS because there’s no money left’...like that’s the only reason for our floundering health care system

Yes it was me, but I never said it was the only issue, just gave examples of those most relevant to the op.

For the record, universal credit costs £60 billion per year. Estimated corporate tax evasion is £1.7 billion. The nhs budget is £129 billion.

So yes I think we should be careful as to who gets claims UC, especially those who are not incapacitated, are fully capable of working and who's financial needs changed due to personal lifestyle choices.

Make. Ends. Meet.

@Stealthmama Wow that is staggering, I had no idea the bill for UC was so high.

I find it very depressing how many people (I am not talking about those with disabilities) are reliant on the state.

@StealthMama Well one of the reasons UC costs so much is that businesses are paying poverty wages, forcing the taxpayer to top them up. The four big supermarkets alone cost £1bn a year in tax credits. We are basically subsiding poverty pay and then blaming people for it.

@Lycidas I agree that is a factor but thank goodness for the Conservatives upping the minimum wage and the tax free allowance so much over the last few years, so that now this is much less of an issue.

It's what welfare is for. Don't be tricked into thinking it's appropriate for you to pay for the pleasure of going to work. If it's not financially beneficial are you are eligible, then you are eligible. Goodness knows the restrictions are right enough now so if you need it, please use it. Welfare and taking care of everyone should be things we are proud of.

@inkysplatter Why is appropriate for the rest of us to pay for the pleasure of her NOT going to work?!

For everyone taking, there is someone else giving. For everyone not working, there is someone else working for them. For everyone taking, there is less money going on public services, or on benefits for people who really need them, like disabled people.

Why is this so hard for some people to understand? There is no magical money tree!

So instead of using your wages to pay for your own child, you're going to mooch of off taxpayers. Why are people so entitled?

@inkysplatter but we're not taking care of everyone, there isn't enough to go round. We need to help those who need it most.

And those who are able to work and currently employed should do their very best to remain that way.

If the op only needs £600 a month to live off, then why not get a part time job that pays it? 2 shifts a week in the supermarket would cut it.

The dp can submit a request to work to regulate shifts to enable childcare, as employers are obliged to help these days...

There are many things the op and dp can do than quit work and claim welfare.

@TheDelorean81! Oh my god!! You are so entitled it makes my blood boil.

I’ve been working full time since I was 17 and to quit work to claim UC in order to stay at home with my children is appalling!! I work a similar job to hours.. 35hr week in a call centre in a city centre and even going back to work part time would work out better than me not going back to work at all. You are disgraceful for thinking that quitting altogether is your only option.

I feel awful dropping my 1 year old off at nursery at 7:30 and then picking her up at 5:30. There are some times when she is the youngest baby to be picked up so I feel even worse but being at work and being able to do stuff with her when we are all at home together is so much better than having no money to do anything with her all day.

You have stated your age and you are older than I am and yet I know it is appalling that you think claiming off the struggling government because “you can” and you are entitled” is disgusting.