Dp and I have booked our wedding.
It's in a barn up in Northumberland - no venue fee so we're just paying for food and drink there. Obviously all the extra bits like registrar, flowers, outfits etc.
We're planning on throwing money at food and booze and not bothering much with princessing it.
Shouldn't cost huge amounts but we have a biggish family and costs will still mount up.
Took Mam and Dad to see it yesterday and dad awkwardly brought up money. Dp and i have the cash to pay for it ourselves. We've been together for 11 years!
Dad's suggestion was that we write down everything we spend then him, us and dp's parents can pay 1/3!
I said not a chance! DPs parents haven't mentioned the wedding beyond saying they'll come and we're not expecting a penny from them!
It's awkward because whilst my DP have money they're quite tight and hate spending.
I know that dad wants to contribute something and has said he's had money put away specifically since I was young. ..but it's so cringey. I'm 40 - I'm not telling dp every penny I spend on flowers etc!
I'd much prefer them to say 'we're gifting you £x for the wedding' and leave it at that.
So as not to drip feed, dsiblings and I were given a small inheritance from dad's side a few years ago. He wasnt mentioned in the will and was upset about being overlooked (though is not skint by any means) so we regrouped the inheritance and shared it equally to include him. For this reason I am happy to take some cash but not in the way he wants to do it!
Sorry - long first world problem right there. But what would you do?