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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To contemplate reporting someone for possible benefit fraud? WWYD?

404 replies

WWYDhey · 30/11/2019 12:16

So there’s this girl I know. Not a close friend but someone I know and would say hi to in the street. We are Facebook friends. I know a bit about her through mutual friends.

She is claiming as a single parent of two kids but her boyfriend lives with her. Full time. They have actually just become engaged and she is pregnant. He has 3 kids to someone else with which he sees 2 of them every other week.

He is ‘unemployed’ but I believe he works full time for cash in hand. (Some kind of joinery or building work)

What has made me consider reporting her (if that’s something you can even do??) is that she spends all her ‘free’ money on weekly hair up appointments, professional make up done. New nails etc (we all know this as she documents everything on Facebook) always out at restaurants and nights out. Almost like she is bragging.
Doesn’t look like she spends much on her kids. They always look a bit scruffy and bored in her photos. (Think tops that look too small or worn out)

And now that she’s pregnant she’s uploading loads of expensive purchases for the baby (ted baker everything, massive pram ordained in Jewell’s)

Now I know some of the replies I will get here will be along the lines of ‘what’s it got to do with you how she spends her money’

  • well yes it has nothing to do with me but it is really irritating that I work full time with kids and pay a lot in tax and have to scrimp and save. I don’t get all of the luxuries she does. Yet ina round about way I contribute to it.

‘How do you know she’s on benefits’ our mutual friend knows she is for certain. Plus she works 18 hours per week in a cafe so it’s not rocket science.

So would you report someone claiming as a single parent when she isn’t?

YABU- Dont report her and don’t give it another thought

YANBU- Do report her

If so how would you report anonymously?

OP posts:
DownToTheSeaAgain · 30/11/2019 15:04

Are benefits really that generous that you can have a fun lifestyle as described - So many threads would suggest not.

But if it really bugs you then report it. Benefit fraud is a crime after all.

Powerplant · 30/11/2019 15:05

Report her - if she hasn’t done anything wrong then no worries for her. If it’s fraud then it’s needs investigating

Purpletigers · 30/11/2019 15:05

There is no pot ! My maths ? I don’t sit and add these things up . Dwp makes mistakes and some people don’t claim everything they’re entitled to . Conclusion- this woman can claim fraudulently.

I don’t give a monkeys about people like the one the op is talking about tbh . I think her children deserve a future though but if she’s setting them the example that they will not need to work she’s doing them a huge disservice...and so it continues .

Ronnie27 · 30/11/2019 15:05

Thing is, you don’t know what’s actually going on. Her boyfriend could have another address and stay with her a few nights a week but pay for nights out. The hairdresser / beautician may be a family member or friend who gives her discount. The pram may be a Chinese job off eBay (sounds like! Grin). She might be up to her neck in debt with payday loans or a high interest credit card. What you see on Facebook is never the real picture. Report if you feel you’ve got grounds to and the dwp will look into it but equally it could be nothing.

JeffreeStar · 30/11/2019 15:05

Report it, I’m fed up of paying taxes for these benefit scroungers.

Purpletigers · 30/11/2019 15:07

Down - benefits aren’t I should imagine but this is benefit fraud . She has a working partner but is claiming housing benefit , free school dinners and all the other things she wouldn’t ordinarily be entitled to . I imagine that’s a lot of extra cash to add to the pot .

Reallybadidea · 30/11/2019 15:08

@posterSpamChaudFroid

A consecrated pram? No wonder you're frothing.

Ahahahahaha Grin Best comment ever Grin

sacred92 · 30/11/2019 15:08

Someone once reported me.
Can you imagine, I work full time, from home on my own business. My dh was in his country of origin for 6 months. I don't claim no benefits except child benefit.

My brother was made homeless so he stayed with me for a week. And my close neighbour told me how another neighbour was heard bragging how she reported me.

Of course, nothing was done because there was nothing to be investigated!

On the other hand,
On my old council estate up north, my neighbour was saying her partner didn't live with her, when he did and he worked full time. She was ordered to pay everything back, her partner actually left her because he didn't wanna pay for everything. And she was left broke for 1 year with children ended up in rent arrears etc.

I think, you need to stay out of her business. It does not affect you, you do not need to play GOD to someone else. I'm sure eventually it will catch up with her and she will get caught, but it sounds as if you are very jealous of her.

3weemonkeys · 30/11/2019 15:10

I think you need to stop looking at Facebook. Just step away OP and concentrate on your own life.

Lifeisabeach09 · 30/11/2019 15:11

so when you spend a night in a hotel you’re indirectly paying for the hotel ?
Sure, you are getting something short term out of it but, ultimately, it is the hotel owners that profit from it.

if you want a secure one you buy it

A lot of people can't afford to buy their own home, especially in certain parts of the country where prices are too high. Rather than build affordable housing, the state provides rental benefits, which is passed on to property owners via the renter. Sure, the renter gets a place to stay (which, arguably, should be ensured by the state anyway) but, ultimately, who benefits, especially long-term?

TheQueef · 30/11/2019 15:11

Oh sorry, it was this part of your post that led me to assume you'd actually thought about it and posted.
he welfare system is on it’s knees . These are the kind of people who are to blame .

90schic · 30/11/2019 15:15

@MinisterforCheekyFuckery just makes me laugh that people get so up in arms about benefit fraud. It’s a shame people don’t have such a voracious appetite for stopping the big corporations committing the same crimes. So much more money being lost.

90schic · 30/11/2019 15:18

@donquixotedelamancha you said it for dramatic effect... would you call someone a ‘government snitch’ if they shopped a murderer or a rapist. I read the post. It’s not the same. At all. Just stop.

Notodontidae · 30/11/2019 15:19

I agree with power plant, report it. If she is legit, there's nothing to worry about. If she is cheating the system, it's not fair on those who are honest.

fluffyjumper · 30/11/2019 15:19

Report her as it's wrong and people committing benefit fraud are taking away from others who actually need the support. It's not for you to judge who needs this support or how they live thier lives though. Stick to facts and not options or judgements. Benefit fraud is a type of theft, that is wrong.

MaButterface · 30/11/2019 15:20

If you have solid evidence YANBU. it is not a victimless crime. Some truly needy people get less because it is not a bottomless pit money well.

SusieOwl4 · 30/11/2019 15:22

I don't get to comments about being jealous? No one is jealous of people who work hard and spend their money how they want ( on credit or not ) but if you are a young couple - both working and struggling with the costs of childcare and travel and rent , and just making ends meet with careful budgeting , why would you not be angry about someone telling lies to gain tax payers money ( if its true ) . I think the jealousy comments are just a deflection and not justified at all .

titsmcghee27 · 30/11/2019 15:24

@Waxonwaxoff0 of course I'd be pissed off but if the op has a valid suspicion then she's within her rights to report it. It's everyone's business when it comes to public money. I can't actually believe the number of people who seem to think this is normal and ok.

Carpathian2 · 30/11/2019 15:26

If you give people enough rope they will gang themselves. The DWP monitor social media and you can bet she's on their radar. They also monitor the bank account that's used to pay benefit money into.

For all you know they may be building a case against her because, if you've seen it, you can bet others have too. Just sit back and watch!

Perhaps if there were less people committing benefit fraud there would be more money for the NHS?

Don't be so uninformed and naive!!

Bluerussian · 30/11/2019 15:26

I am eternally grateful that I've never been tempted to join facebook.

Carpathian2 · 30/11/2019 15:27
  • hang not gang!!
changeforprivacy · 30/11/2019 15:27

don't get to comments about being jealous? No one is jealous of people who work hard and spend their money how they want

You don't understand that people would be jealous that others have this lifestyle by not working? It's not about what they have so much as how they achieve it.

I would be jealous if someone I knew was living the same life as me when I work damn hard for it and they don't. Of course I would. It's not material jealously so much as situational.

changeforprivacy · 30/11/2019 15:28

The DWP monitor social media and you can bet she's on their radar. They also monitor the bank account that's used to pay benefit money into

They do not monitor bank accounts.

EngTech · 30/11/2019 15:30

If you are happy paying your taxes and feel it is being used for fraudulent purposes, then accept the situation

If you are not, raise it as a concern for it to be investigated through the normal channels

Carpathian2 · 30/11/2019 15:30

I was told that by the DWP.

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