Notifications hidden on DH phone. AIBU

[whitekittens]

For some time now DH has had the notifications on his iPhone hidden. It basically means that when he gets a message, email etc. it will just come up on his locked screen that he has a notification rather than the first part of the message.

He hasn’t really given me an explanation for it. It’s making me really uncomfortable wondering why he doesn’t want me to see what’s in his messages. It wouldn’t cross my mind to do it with my phone...in fact I didn't even know you could set your phone like that until he did it!

AIBU to think it’s dodgy?

My phone has been on permanent "Do not disturb" mode for the past two months meaning my phone doesn't ping or vibrate for any texts or updates or anything that comes through on my phone. It's bliss. It's also set that so if someone calls my phone twice within fifteen minutes it classes it as an 'emergency' any bypasses the mode so I don't miss any potentially important calls. I'm not cheating or acting suspicious, I was just tired of the constant harassment from my phone

I Turned mine off as often someone messages me something private which anyone could then read and once someone was slagging someone off and I was right near said person.

It might be suspicious but mine wasnt turned off at all for a suspicious reason

I have this. I'm not cheating.

I do this to stop my DS asking why people are texting me swears

YABU he doesn't owe you an explanation for this it’s completely normal behaviour. I have mine on just so I can quickly glance and see if something needs my attention.
If I was in an open plan office I would probably turn it off but my office is fairly small so I don’t bother.
I’ve turned my whatsapp last seen off as I have a couple of colleagues on my personal number and I don’t want them to be able to see that! It’s not suspicious though.

I'm quite uncomfortable with the lack of concern that people have for their friends' privacy.
My late husband and I didn't have each other's passwords. It never even occurred to either of us to ask for the other's.

I have a friend with mental health issues, and I'm the only person they confide in. Anyone who had my password would be able to see his messages of extreme distress. No way am I going to allow that to happen.
That's an extreme, but I'm sure almost all of us will have had conversations online that the other party would not want anyone else to read.

If I pour out my heart to a friend, I trust that it's private. So the idea that a spouse can just casually log on to their phone or laptop and read my deepest feelings bothers me hugely. Does it not bother anyone else?

When I read people boasting that of course they can look at their husband's phone any time they like, I find that quite disturbing.

It's not boasting, saraclara, for me it's just that I don't conduct my life on my mobile and there's nothing to see anyway. I could look at my husband's phone anytime I wanted, nothing to boast about there either. I just don't care to.

It doesn't mean we don't value privacy; we just inherently have it. Not a boast either, just a factual statement.

My notifications are hidden. When I bought this phone it asked when I was setting it up and I figured it was handy seeing as my phone is often visible to my staff. Not that theres ever anything interesting on it!

Has your child got to an age where it could be useful to hide notifications?

If not, without an explanation, I'd be worried he wants to receive flirty texts.

My DH has this for Facebook and WhatsApp, I don’t think anything of it. I know his passcode and he’ll often ask me to check what the message is if he’s driving or flat out on the sofa.

I don’t even give it headspace. I trust him, he’s never given me reason not to.