AIBU? food bank cheeky fucker?

[Zoofiller]

Before I get my ass handed to me.....

Disclaimer: I believe strongly in food banks, my job relies on their excellent work, I donate occasionally and recognise that all people from all walks of life can get caught out with unexpected bills/Enough money to make ends meet.

It may be affecting my judgement as I work with homeless people who have absolutely nothing.

I have an acquaintance who is well know for being beyond tight. Eg. Down the curry house will order & pay for £4 veg dish only, eat everyone else’s food and refuse to split costs. She has been challenged on this.

She claims constant poverty (which we all used to give sympathy to), all whilst seemingly going on a weekend away every couple of months, eating out weekly, a luxury holiday this year, home renovations, concerts and recently drinks and Christmas shopping in a big city. (FB tags)

However, she has stated that she has a system to work the food bank. In this area you can claim 3 times a year. So she has stated that she is rotating between different children’s centres and the school to keep getting food vouchers.

I have distanced myself and am trying to ignore but.....

Am I being unreasonable to be irked about her using the food bank in this manner?

I'd report her.

To be blunt, she sounds le she has more money than me - I live on a modest wage, and I donate to the food bank - I'd be gutted if my donations were going to her.

I give to food banks. I want to help people who are struggling. Please let the charities know. She is basically stealing from someone with nothing. How could anyone do that?

How do food banks work? Do you go and get given stuff or do you walk around and choose what you need like in a shop?

Not that this is relevant, I'm just wondering how it works.

I think traditional foodbanks just give you a parcel with no choice.

There is a scheme in my village, open to all via fareshare. They get surplus from the supermarkets and people pay a small donation for 5 items. You are allowed one meat item and pick the others, it varies from pasta, cereal, easter eggs, condiments, noodles, soya milk, dairy and ready meals. It is an eye opener how much of the supermarkets posh ranges end up here.

How do food banks work? Do you go and get given stuff or do you walk around and choose what you need like in a shop?

Very good question

They all operate slightly differently. Ours is Trussell Trust.

Food ‘parcels’ are made up according to Trussell Trust guidelines. They roughly cover 3 days’ worth of food. Packs are made up as ‘single’, ‘double’ and ‘family’ (2+2). There are slightly different items in each, so a family pack will have ‘puddings’ in but a single pack doesn’t. All goods are long life. To give context, a ‘single’ is 2 very large carrier bags.

Clients can then choose from ‘miscellaneous’ goods that have been donated but don’t fit the standard packs. For example, a local farmer donates excess eggs. We also provide sanitary protection, toiletries and toilet rolls that aren’t part of a standard food pack. We accept any food as long as it is in date, not perishable and contains no alcohol (Christmas puddings are very problematic with this one - volunteers end up taking many home).

People are given vouchers by all sorts of agencies. CAB, JObCentrePlus, Council, Housing Associations, Women’s Aid, Youth Services, Red Cross, School FSAs, Probation Services and local addiction dependency services are the most common. Clients should receive no more than 3 vouchers in six months, but this is not ‘set in stone’. We have had clients who have no access to benefits (foreign nationals) who have lost jobs and had literally no money whatsoever. They have received continuous help for months.

Agencies should keep track of who they are issuing the vouchers to and how many. Our Foodbank doesn’t keep records due to GDPR, but we know several users ‘play the system’ by going from one agency to another. These people are still in genuine need however.

For rough sleepers and those with dietary needs we often make up bespoke packs.

FOR THOSE WHO DONATE:

Please donate CRACKERS as well as BISCUITS. Crackers are far more useful to rough sleepers as they don’t end up full of ants in the summer and can be used as savoury.

Please donate NOTHING with alcohol in. Check things like mince pies and festive cakes. They cannot be given out.

Please consider donating PET FOOD. Clients will often feed their animals before themselves.

Cans with ring pulls are better - particularly for rough sleepers.

Microwave instant rice is a really good idea. Many people in temporary accommodation have very limited access to cooking facilities.

Thought peop me had to be referred by a doctor or social worker to keep it for those in genuine need ?

Ok thanks 👍

What is ‘genuine need’ though?

Is it the woman with the highly paid job who has just fled domestic violence with her two children and is living in a shelter?

Is it the two addicts who’ve just been given a flat after living in a tent for 6 months and need to ‘restock their larder’?

Is it the highly paid IT consultant who has no money as he’s just gone onto Statutory Sick Pay, has a huge mortgage and is paying child maintenance for 5 children?

Is it the person who is living on the streets as he’s has just been kicked out of the homeless shelter for alleged sexual assault on another resident?

It is best not to think about whether need is ‘deserved’ or ‘genuine’ and just accept that Foodbanks serve a really necessary purpose in our society. The need for them will not go away, regardless of who’s in government.

If she doesn’t actually need the help she is taking it away from someone who does need the help.

Are you able to report her? She is abusing the food bank system. Don’t know how she can sleep at night!!

A friend of mine volunteers at a foodbank and tells me many stories of CFs. The people that run the foodbank, for instance, have told her they know that the same people come in frequently (first in the queue and without a voucher) head straight for the fridges and take as much of the meat products that they can and then sell them on which means the genuinely needy don't get a look in.
Obviously the people running the foodbank should tighten up on this type of thing but because they're such giving individuals don't want to address it. My friend also gets phone calls from people complaining about what they have been given, ie: "I want ready meals because I don't want to open tins!"
In my job I give out foodbank vouchers and therefore do understand how much they are needed. Unless the foodbank staff tighten up the system there will always be people that take the mick.

I hope you thought really really carefully before posting. There will be people who may have considered donating to food banks who will not now, as you’ve added to the constant (inaccurate) narrative that they are routinely used by people taking the piss.

I can’t imagine thinking that my vent was worth further jeopardising a service like this - especially when you have clients relying on it.

The foodbank volunteer who also posted, exhibiting contempt for her clients and a failure to grasp the confidentiality by which she surely is bound, should seek out another position.

And even as I’m posting - another poster gleefully sharing gossip from another food bank volunteer who needs a reminder about the meaning of a confidential service.

So much enjoyment gained from trashing a service that feeds people.

There will always be sh*ts who take advantage of the system. Where I live you need a referrel to go to the food bank, you can't just show up and expect to be given food. I voluntered there last year and I would say that over 90% of the people who I helped, clearly REALLY needed the foodbank.

There are people that take the piss and it’s so frustrating because it takes it away from those that need it. Through my old job I know of someone that really took advantage of a toy appeal for her numerous kids, yet had a very high spec computer that could have been sold to give her kids a nice Christmas (high spec for gaming, not working, has never worked...)

YANBU. It's a damn disgrace.

That's awful.. I have needed food banks in the past, this year has been a bit better but got offered anyway as a single mum, not working due to illness but dont want it.. taking anyway as know quite a few who really need an extra bit ontop of what's offered.. really bad shes taking it when she doesn't need it!

It’s people like her that will put people off donating.

No, but stories like this will be used by people who would never have donated to justify it. Which is why I wouldn't post something like this and I work in the field. Many Tories would though.

Some reasons people seem to have money and use services:

Financial abuse
Cognitive issues
Obsessive behaviour (inc. hoarding)
Compulsive spending
Gambling
Addictions
Debt...

None of which people advertise.

She's a twat. I work and have very little left but this week donated to a good bank. I'd hate it to go to those who don't really need it, and deprive others who do 😡

To lighten the tone of the thread, when I was handing out the foodbank shopping list at Tesco yesterday, a lovely lady was delighted to take one. She told me that a year ago she'd had to use the food bank herself. And she was thrilled to now be in a situation where she is able to buy an item from the list to donate to the bank.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe

I actually think you're in completely the wrong job, OP

Why?

Irony

Sorry wrong thread🙁

Report the cheeky cunt! I know people on their fucking knees trying to get vouchers. This shit puts me off donating.

Report it, why wouldn't you? She is beyond hideous!

Personally OP I would not report her I'd judge the hell out of her and cut her out of my life if I was 100% sure of what she was doing though. You have reminded me I need to actually donate more. In the past I donated a lot but having money problems myself and switching to a cheaper shop with out a donation bin I haven't in a while. I've been very careful this month and it being a short month between pay days for us so have some spare money (not often the case) there's been a few people saying they don't donate because of this kind of thing happening or will cease to because this so I wanted to say that at least one person is remembering to donate because of your thread. Also as for your motivation I hope you're sincere I can understand why you would ask you just need to see the range of responses you got to see it is not a black and white situation many people disagree on the best course of action. Whatever you decide to do I wish you the best keep doing what you do to help those in need.