About international men’s day blog

[Pumpkinspicewhatever]

I work for a big bank. We have an active company intranet and various blogs go up at different points in the calendar from the great and the good of the company. Most recently for international men’s day.
This blogs opening gambit was “did you know 1 in 3 men have experienced domestic violence?” (And no source to back this up) followed by a fact about how suicide rates are 3x higher for men than women.
Now I have no problem in theory with international men’s day and the associated celebrating good male role models etc, which is the main thrust of what my company seems to be doing. But to lead with a fact about men being common victims of DV (I can’t find the 1 in 3 statistic from a quickish google) feels really blind and inappropriate. DV across the world is more a problem for women than men. Surely this is universally accepted? Can’t they lead with anything more positive for IMD than misrepresenting what is a devastating social problem (more so for women?)
Not sure, but this didn’t sit well with me. I wish they had led with something else. I’ve asked the writer to clarify their source as well.

Do you know what the figure is for women?

Refuge reckon its 1 in 4 women will experience DV in their lifetime.

I’ve seen social media posts claiming that 40% of domestic violence victims are male. No sources, mind you.

While I’m of the mindset that every bloody day is International Men’s Day, I suppose it’s a good thing if it helps break down the idea that men shouldn’t seek help for mental health problems etc. I really struggle to believe that 40% though.

Every post about International Men's Day is one less whinge about the lack of an International Men's Day, when the women's one comes round.

1 in 3 victims of DA are Male, not 1 in 3 men are victims are DA.

I still think it’s important to focus on as a huge amount of DA against men goes unreported. Highlighting DA against men does not take away from the issue of DA against women.

But they got the statistic wrong.

The DV thing sounds a bit off to me. They definitely should have led with suicide and mental health issues, I believe suicide is the biggest killer of men under a certain age. Also men's lower life expectancy is partly attributed to their desire to appear 'macho' and not visiting a Dr.

Men have a lot of issues mostly tied up toxic masculinity and gender stereotypes causing negative effects. I strongly believe feminism and supporting women will benefit men where they need support as well, by removing barriers to women working, stopping stereotypes as women as weak and men as strong, therefore challenging the default of men being breadwinners/providers and women being carers.

While it is true that men are sometimes victims of domestic violence, and that this is unacceptable, I can see why it struck you as slightly off. Because that figure, particularly, is usually chucked around by woman-hating wankers of the sort who think that feminism has Gone Too Far and that women should stop whining, because white men are now the Most Oppressed.

I'm not particularly opposed to IMD - for one thing, if it's about encouraging men to take care of their physical and mental health, then that's good.

The Office for National Statistics (which takes the figures from the Crime Survey for England and Wales) say that the figures are:

• 27.1% of women reported experiencing any domestic abuse since the age of 16 (i.e. 1 in 4)
• 13.2% of men reported experiencing any domestic abuse since the age of 16 (i.e. 1 in 8)

It sounds like they got mixed up between '1/3 of victims are men' and '1/3 of men are victims'.

So, because it's more of a problem for women
, the problems that men face shouldn't be highlighted? (on International Mens Day). Domestic violence against males IS a problem and it's one that is massively under-reported because it is often seen as a non-issue or even as a source of ridicule for the men involved.

@PBo83 the statistic they were using was wrong as PPs have noticed. Violent crime against women especially intimate partner violence is an international emergency and therefore I would not have led with a statistic on DV for international men’s day.

@Pumpkinspice

Sounds like there was an error with the stat. The fact the 1 in 3 victims of DV are male is still a large proportion and is definitely an issue that should be talked about, particularly considering the stigma attached to it.

I'm going to disagree with you here. I think that most people have an idea of DV where only women are victims and therefore it can be hard for male victims to be noticed. I therefore think it's entirely appropriate to flag that on international men's day.

Though I agree with pps that they got the stat wrong.

@Patte - Just the point I was trying to make.

@PBo83 you appear to forget male on male violence in relationships. My brother runs a support group for gay men who've been in abusive relationships..

False reporting and made up stats. Wouldn't it be wonderful if International Men's Day focussed on the enormous problem of male violence (not just against women), and addressed that?

I also agree that it was entirely appropriate to lead with it, especially on IMD.

Men make up a third of the victims - that's a huge amount and there is nowhere near a proportional amount of campaigns, etc, to reflect that.

@Wildthyme

Very true, in fact, and I might have got my stats wrong. Rates of DV are significantly higher amongst same-sex couples with the highest rate being amongst female/female couples (proportionally)

Male suicide is a problem that does need addressing. Absolutely.

It’s not really a large proportion though is it? It’s a third. And what are the stats regarding the gender of DV perpetrators? How does that square with this portrayal? If 3 in 3 victims were women then there would be no Male victims, and no one is saying that at all, but 2 out of 3 being women makes it a feminist issue for me. I don’t think anyone including women’s rights advocates are denying that men can be DV victims. Just that it is arguably NOT one of the leading issues to highlight - the mental health stats eg on suicide, yes. Or stats about men not having access to paid parental leave. The statistic about DV being wrong is just irresponsible.

It's one article looking at other people in need. It doesn't take away from the articles written about women but it might make someone realise that men can be abused too.

It's not a competition about who is worse off, people know it's women and an article isn't going to take away from that.

Male suicide had been declining year on year from 2013 - 2018. In 2018 it rose significantly.

Of course a third is a large proportion! A small proportion would be 5% or less, I'd say, and even then I don't think male victims are getting even 5% of the attention on this issue.

A third is a huge proportion particularly seeing the lack in coverage the issue receives. Male suicide stats are horrifying but there's been a lot of awareness around mental health and suicide in men, not so much domestic violence which is why they probably chose to highlight it.

Most of the international mens day stuff I see is just moaning about women. Ie why do women get all the funding when men need it too etc etc. Probably because women got off their arses and got it done rather than just moaning about men! There are important issues regarding mens health etc that should be highlighted and it's a good thing that there is a day for that, but these things can be done without getting a dig in about women surely?

@PBo83 they chose to highlight it completely wrongly. They did not get the statistic correct and overrepresented the amount of men who have become victims of DV, to make a good headline.