To think children don't need to be constantly grazing on food?

[UnderneathTheMangoTree]

I have a friend I usually see twice a week, we both have 2 DC each age 5 and 3.

She is constantly feeding the kids and it is getting on my nerves - it's mostly stuff like fruit purees, bread sticks, slices of plain white bread, plain biscuits. I get annoyed that my kids spend the afternoon eating mostly unhealthy food and then refuse their tea, which they normally love.

I have given up trying to stop them from eating the snacks she provides because she always insists on giving them the same amount she gives her DC. I have now even started taking similar snacks whenever we meet because I felt uncomfortable not offering any food except for fruit and a slice of bread and butter, which is what my kids normally have for a snack.

AIBU to think that 3 and 5 year olds don't need to be constantly grazing on food and that one smallish snack is enough to tide them over till tea? Or do I need to relax and accept that they are going to spend two afternoons a week grazing on food and then not eating anything at teatime?

Btw, my DC don't beg for food in the afternoons once they have had their fruit and bread and they are both on the 75th percentile for height and weight, so I am definitely not starving them!

There are a lot of comments about the risk of obesity from snacking, but less about dental heath. Children who are snacking between meals will have more food coating their teeth for a longer period of time. This will lead to tooth decay over time. If this is high sugar food such as fruit, chocolate, sweets, biscuits, white bread products, fizzy drinks etc. then the effects will be even worse. Children don't brush their teeth after every snack.
People are also correct to point out that the damage to health is not immediately obvious. It's not 'eat a biscuit, instantly gain a pound and a tooth drops out.' The damage builds up and by the time it is noticeable, it is too late to do anything about it. Adults end up with expensive dental bills because of childhood eating habits.

I am 50 and have crap teeth because of terrible dental habits as a teenager.

That's another thing - DD can completely cope with missing an occasional meal if we simply don't get chance (if we're out or something). We don't have to plan our days out around mealtimes, & consequently it's much easier for us to be flexible. (It doesn't stop her moaning for an ice-cream or a cake when she sees somewhere selling them, but she never gets "hangry" or excessively tired due to hunger.