Singing along at a musical to cause such upset?

[cantbeatfreshsheets]

I went to a musical yesterday with my parents & sister to celebrate my mums birthday. We had a really nice day & this was the last thing we had planned. Arrived a few mins late and got to our seats with no problems.

After about 20 mins in. A catchy song came on. It was Tina Turner. My mum sang along for a couple of times during the chorus. It was hard not too. The whole show was about her being oppressed. Which is exactly how we felt after what happens next.

The lady in front turned around. Looked at my mum & said could you please, then used her hand against her mouth to gesture my mum to zip it 🤐 very passive aggressive.

Mum looked at us as if to say. What the F**
Anyway. She said I'll have to speak to her at the interval. Meanwhile I just thought what a spoilsport?!?! If you can't sing along at a musical what's wrong with the world. It's not like she was singing at the top of her voice???

It resulted with the lady in front going to make a complaint about my mum as mum tapped her on the shoulder and said during the interval How dare you tell me how to behave. My mum ended up going to see the manager herself where the other women was acting like we were trying to victimise her for not being happy against us telling her it was a free country. They said we were aggressive and being unreasonable?!?!

She said. It said on the way in you can't sing. We said. Well we didn't see that notice as we were late. We ended up leaving as my mum was so cross. There was a slight scene. The other woman was behaving like a child in my opinion. Has the world has gone mad.

My sister and I told her that she had spoilt our mums birthday and She was clearly enjoying playing the victim. I think she was probably shocked we confronted her over it.

We left. Were we being unreasonable? Or has the world gone crazy? I'd love to hear you're thoughts.

I reckon they were sloshed.

When I confronted 2 clearly pissed women (at the same show) they couldn't see what's as wrong with what they were doing. Apparently they had the right to ruin everyone else's enjoyment of the show.

What amazed me most was their inability to realise that had we all been doing what they were doing (singing loudly, talking throughout the time the actors were talking) them they wouldn't have enjoyed the show either. They were only able to enjoy it because the rest of us were behaving like civilised human beings.

You were BVU.

It is highly disrespectful to sing along at a musical and is bad etiquette. It is distracting from the audience and distracting for the actors on stage (yes - we can hear you)

They play an announcement pre show also asking you not to sing along until the concert finale. You were late, so you missed it.

I was at the same musical last night and it was made VERY clear that you get the opportunity to sing along at the end. There are signs everywhere - even in the loo - to tell you not to spoil other people's enjoyment by screeching along and there's also a pre-show announcement. So yes, you were BU.

I think some people should put a sock in it.

Perhaps how to behave in a theatre could be part of a citizenship test?

OP

It seems the jury's out. WWBU.

"The jury's out" means that the jury are still debating. As you yourself have acknowledged, the jury had returned with their verdict - YWBU. (Educated and cultured my left arsecheek!)

A) we were about all of 2 minutes late. Yes not ideal. The ushers (yes the ushers) at the Aldwych theatre. (Perhaps take it up with them on their policies). Allowed us and about a dozen other people to watch the show on a screen before waiting for an appropriate time to allow us to be seated at which point we apologised to those 2 people who had to stand up to allow us to sit.

Suddenly you remember this? How convenient. Why do I find it hard to believe you?

B) The singing (clattering from my mother for albeit one quarter of a single song) was not loud or bellowing. Just a moment where the words came out into an audible sound. After yes a celebration and a few drinks. I never heard a thing. I was one seat away from her. She stopped immediately after the lady turned around and rudely signalled to shut the F** up.

My original point was highlighting. That could the lady in front of perhaps approached her without mimicking the sign of 'zip it' in such an aggressive manner? The outcome of the evening may have been very different. If it was the other way around and something had bothered me. I would of at least started with 'excuse me'.
As another poster has said - maybe she didn't want to add to the racket your DM was making. Ok - perhaps a "shushing" finger-to-lips would have been less unpleasant, but perhaps your drunken mother was louder than she realised.

We were not thrown out. We left of our own accord as we felt as though we had already caused enough of a disturbance and it was the done thing.
You mean you realised that you had made complete and utter arses of yourselves, that the rest of the audience was on the other woman's side, that the ushers were striding purposefully towards you, and felt too embarrassed to stay

For those of you that have used completely underhand vulgar comments. You know who you are and seem to feature as regulars. All I will say is. You're clearly as ill mannered as we are!!!!
Not sure what is underhand about a vulgar comment, but I'll let that pass - there are some people who would, as my grannie used to say "drive a saint to swear". You and your family seem to be among that number.

On a final note. I'm seeing Elton John next Christmas. Perhaps I'll start a new thread on etiquette at concerts????
Try demonstrating some - that will be sufficient.

We came late, we sang. People were annoyed AIBU? Everyone - yes you are, completely. OP - you're all wrong.

• When you're at Elton John, please don't stand/have your hand up the whole time recording it all on an iPad/your phone.
• Turn up on time.

I'm trying to think how OP's mother's freedoms might have enhanced other culturally important events - Maybe scuttling into the ring to whack Muhammed Ali with her handbag at a crucial moment of the ''rumble in the jungle' fight? Elbowing Freddie Mercury off the piano during Bomedhiam Rhapsody at Live Aid? Unplugging Bob Dylan's guitar at the 1965 Newport Folk Festival?

It seems the jury's out. - Nope, the jury is very much back in with a clear verdict.

A) we were about all of 2 minutes late. Yes not ideal... - You were 10 minutes late at the start of this. The doors open 30 minutes before the show starts, so you weren't "getting-there-just-as-the-last-people-were-getting-seated" late, you were at least 40 minutes late.

B) The singing (clattering from my mother for albeit one quarter of a single song) was not loud or bellowing. Just a moment where the words came out into an audible sound. After yes a celebration and a few drinks. I never heard a thing. I was one seat away from her. She stopped immediately after the lady turned around and rudely signalled to shut the F* up. - I'm not great at maths but even I know that 2/3 choruses is more than 1/4 of a song.
You'd been drinking so your judgement and your hearing were both impaired.
According to your first post the woman did not tell rudely signal your Mum to shut the f**k up, she said could you please, then used her hand against her mouth to gesture my mum to zip it. She used the minimum amount of words she could so as not to disturb others and even said please! One thing she was not was passive-aggressive, her meaning was very clear. Would your mum have reacted differently if she had just put her finger to her lips I wonder? Given her over-the-top escalation and demanding not to be told how to behave, I guess not.

@FelicisNox of course it's common sense that you don't sing along in a theatre unless invited to do so. I honestly cannot believe theatres have to have signs up and make announcements at the start of the show. Are people really that stupid?

Of course they also have to ask audiences to turn their phones off!! We are turning into a nation of morons.

I too have seen Mama Mia (twice) and Priscilla (four times) and didn't hear anyone singing until the end. Glad I wasn't at any of the same performances as you

Some places now have special performances for people on the autism spectrum or with sensory or learning disabilities. Maybe they could have separate sing-along performances for people who fancy themselves as Susan Boyle, so they can all sing along together and everyone else can avoid them. Or maybe a separate sound-proof glass compound to one side where they can be isolated?

The op says she didn't see the sign. The other woman could have said please can you not sing we all want to hear the show and been polite.
What is with all of this hostility and rudeness.
I've been to the cinema and people having a chat during the film I just tune them out and watch the film.
Your mum shouldn't of been singing but she was having fun.
Sorry it ruined your evening.

How can you possibly think you're in the right or accuse the woman of "playing the victim"? She very much was the victim. You and your family were the culprit and I can guarantee that you annoyed several people.

It's really sad how many people take this hugely entitled, self-centred approach to life, with no understanding of how their behaviour impacts others. It wasn't like this in the past. What happened?

Educated and cultured my left arsecheek!

How very dare you! I'll have you know that the OP has first class honours from the Derek Trotter school de la fromage frais

@LolaSmiles - I suspect that @cantbeatfreshsheets has misused the 'jury's out' phrase. She hasn't understood that it means that the jury is out of the courtroom, deliberating - so the outcome of the deliberations is still in doubt - she thinks it means they are back in the court and have decided.

I'm afraid I do find it hard to comprehend why some people still think it is OK to sing along at a musical - unless it is a specific sing-along version or audience participation has been invited, why would you think the people around you want to listen to your version of the show, rather than the professionals on the stage? Would you go to a Shakespeare play and witter along with the actors or describe the plot as it unfolds? Or, as people on here have humorously suggested, take an instrument along to a concert and join in?

I am pretty sure you wouldn't - so why is a musical any different? Why don't people KNOW that the audience are there to hear the professional performers, not Mavis from seat 23H warbling out of tune?

Sorry you were being completely unreasonable- what next people saying the lines of hamlet as the actors do? It’s not fair to sing a long unless it’s a song a long show.

The other woman could have said please can you not sing we all want to hear the show and been polite

Ha if she'd said all that then OP probably would have posted saying the woman told her mum to be quiet even though she was talking herself.

It's ridiculous to have to tell someone at a show that other people want to hear the show! It's not a case of cultured or not it's rude - if OP's mum didn't realise she was being rude that's ok all she needed to do was listen and chalk it up to experience and realising something she didn't know.

She was an absolute drama llama. Her enjoying the show isn't more important than other people enjoying it. She ruined her own evening.

How very dare you! I'll have you know that the OP has first class honours from the Derek Trotter school de la fromage frais

Pardonnez-moi!

I grovel at her feet Fairfax

I think it has been missed that OP s Mum sang only a couple of times during the chorus. I think though she should have piped down, actually she spoiled her own birthday. For all we know woman in front had a hearing aid and was deafened by said Mother.Also you were late for curtain up and I do wonder if said Mother was not a bit tiddly.

Sorry I have been wanting to sing along the entire thread since you began posting

Being on an elevator
when somebody shouts "Hold the door!"
Schadenfreude!
F* you lady, that's what stairs are for!"

I think it has been missed that OP s Mum sang only a couple of times during the chorus.

Originally, she sung the chorus a couple of times and one or two small bits, or something like that. And they were ten minutes late.

After OP unanimously had her arse handed to her on a plate, she tried to change this to a couple of times during the chorus, and two minutes late.