Cafe wouldn’t let pregnant woman use toilet

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I’ve just ordered some breakfast for collection from a local cafe round the corner and had a quick flick through the reviews first. The most recent review is:

‘As a heavily pregnant lady went in desperate for the bathroom and they refused to let me use their toilet despite me being in tears and not close to anywhere else open. In a packed shop full of customers, they said no with no heart, no remorse, no feeling. Have never been more horrified, myself and my husband will never be using this place again’

I feel like it’s a bit harsh and the bit about there being nowhere to go close by is very untrue. There’s a Morrison’s maximum 5 minutes walk away with toilets. As a (second time) pregnant woman myself I wouldn’t get annoyed if an establishment didn't let me use staff toilets, I’d just find somewhere with public ones. The cafe gave a long response as to why they couldn’t let her use the bathroom. Mainly because their insurance didn’t cover customers in the staff area of the cafe and there were lots of boxes etc. laid about. If the pregnant woman had hurt herself then it probably wouldn’t have been good for them. They also said they managed to get the keys for the toilet in the opposite pub so it’s not like the reviewer didn’t get to use one. I think it was quite kind of them to go to the effort of making sure she used a bathroom.

Do you think she’s being reasonable or not? I think she’s being a bit U due to there being a Morrison’s so close by! (I’m not the cafe owner just interested in people’s views). My DM thinks they should have let her use it no questions asked purely because she was pregnant, I’m a little unsure

If I was the owner of a business I could use my judgement. But if I was an employee there's no way I'd feel able to sidestep the rules. It's not about being a jobsworth, it's about not being in a position to exercise discretion.

Some pregnant women are similar to people with conditions that require IMMEDIATE access to a toilet. No one should be refused in these situations. There are times where need supersedes rules. If someone was going to throw up or soil themselves or wet themselves then let them use the freaking loo.

A genuine question, GoodGriefSunshine - if someone knocked on your door claiming to be pregnant, would you let them use your loo?

I sure as hell wouldn't. I don't think businesses should feel obliged to, either.

There might well be an issue with a lack of public toilets, but that isn't the fault of local businesses. The reviewer in the OP should lobby her council, rather than flaming the cafe.

Of course members of the public cannot expect to use staff facilities when it would invalidate insurance. Like a pp I would be fired on the spot if I allowed a customer into the staff area where all our belongings are kept and our office with stock, paperwork and the safe is. Someone wetting themselves is less of an issue than me losing my job imo. The woman was ridiculous writing a negative review when the cafe workers clearly found her an alternative.

Why is there not a get out of claiming if you sign this sheet and we will let you use our toilets.

And people would claim they signed under duress, so it wasn't valid . . .

Some pregnant women are similar to people with conditions that require IMMEDIATE access to a toilet. No one should be refused in these situations. There are times where need supersedes rules. If someone was going to throw up or soil themselves or wet themselves then let them use the freaking loo.

Feel free to register your house on one of those apps that show people where they can access a toilet then. You can let them in and clean it up since you're so concerned with others' needs. Or does this only apply to others?

I had severe mobility issues when I was pregnant with my second and couldn't have walked to the other place. I would have bought something from the cafe to use the bathroom

You don't have to provide a customer toilet unless you have an alcohol licence.
There are clear guidelines about the separation between staff and public toilets because of hygiene.

Strangers don't open the doors I knocked on

You seriously expected to access a stranger's home to use their toilet? For real? Mine's upstairs. There's no way I'm letting some random into my home with my kids to use the bog.

I'd have just gone to the cafe toilet and dared them to say anything!

Notnow Were you genuinely chapping changers doors and expecting to use their toilets? I would say no to someone who did that to me, regardless of what they were telling me.

And I’m not precious about people using my toilet but I wouldn’t let a complete stranger in.

What happened to HUMAN DECENCY??? Some pregnant women are similar to people with conditions that require IMMEDIATE access to a toilet. No one should be refused in these situations. There are times where need supersedes rules

Most shops have rules about not letting non staff members "through the back". All manner of reasons, mostly coming under the heading of security or safety. Someone with so-called human decency lets a non-customer into the staff area, they trip and fall, rob yesterday's taking, help themselves to stock, snaffle a handbag or simply take up 10 minutes of the staff member's time supervising them. Staff member then gets sacked for gross misconduct for breaking the store rules.

I also don't know how I'd react when presented with a card stating someone has a known medical condition like Crohn's. I know it's debilitating and I know that they need help. But on the other hand, I also know that there are boxes stacked high in the only staff loo, that there are bags with donations in piles across the back shop and that it's totally against policy to allow anyone through the sorting room door.

Agree though that some sort of financial incentive to companies might be a good idea though, although forcing businesses to allow customers (or random members of the public) access to loos is not on. Lots of loos in Glasgow city centre are permanently locked and you have to get a staff member to let them in - they don't want junkies shooting up in hte loos at KFC.

I'd have just gone to the cafe toilet and dared them to say anything!

Of course you would.

Places serving food have to have a toilet don't they?

space it's already been explained up the thread, no, they don't. Only if they provide over a certain number of seats or have an alcohol license and they can reserve the right to restrict use to customers only.

@slashlover This was access to staff toilets, not just walking into the customer toilets.

@LoyaltyBonus Where did I say it wasn't? I've said many times about it possibly being next to the office or staff not being able to supervise customers in staff only areas.

So she wasn’t a customer and the toilets were for staff only. Why are some people so entitled?

Not quite the same but some people are fairly entitled to their 'right' to use staff toilets. I work in a clothes shop within a shopping centre so lots of public toilets available, just not in my particular shop. Women comes in with a small child who was repeatedly complaining that she needed the toilet.
Women ignores her as she shops and then comes to me begging me to let her child use our toilet as she's desperate and "about to wet herself". I explain that we aren't allowed to let anyone use our staff toilets as all our stock is in the back, cameras, staff possession etc etc. She then calls me heartless and goes ahead with her purchase before taking desperate child to the toilet

I think Loyalty has confused slashlover and shearwater. Slash was quoting shear about walking into the toilets.

Why would she have been in the staff area / near boxes?

She would have just used the customer toilets?

Lucky your bladder has been OK in pregnancy OP, happy claps for you!

I am pretty sure I read somewhere (although no idea where) that bars, cafes, restaurants etc can't refuse pregnant woman use of customers toilet. I don't think it applies to staff toilets though.

I am pretty sure I read somewhere (although no idea where) that bars, cafes, restaurants etc can't refuse pregnant woman use of customers toilet.

That doesn't sound very enforceable. Any female of childbearing age could say she was pregnant.

Recently visited New York, there appeared to be no public bathrooms anywhere. All cafes etc had them, but for paying customers only.

Starbucks. There is one on most blocks in NYC and the queue for the toilet is always six people deep because everyone uses them like public loos. You don't need to buy anything either

Sorry, yes Slashlover, I was responding the poster you quoted

Why do so many posters keep insisting that anywhere serving food to eat in has to have toilets? They do not.

I can't believe so many of you have never been in an eating place that doesn't have toilets. There are enough around.

I don't think anyone should expect to be able to use staff toilets no matter what the circumstances. As others have said, insurance does not usually cover anyone but staff being in the staff areas.

When I worked in retail I used to get really fed up with people asking if we had a toilet and then when I said "no" asking if they could use the staff one. Some of them would get quite abusive when refused.

I worked in a bookshop and then a catering equipment shop so why on earth would we have had a toilet for customers? Often there was only 1 person on the shop floor so could not leave to take the person to the toilet anyway.

One charming customer when told "no" let her child pee on the carpet!