AIBU?
Family and ‘we’re only buying for the children now’
NemophilistRebel · 18/11/2019 17:57
Am I the only one who thinks you skinflint?
Family member who has 3 children which we have always bought for along with the parents decides as soon as we have first baby that now we have children (1) we can buy for children only at Christmas and birthdays.
So that’s years worth of buying for their 3 and them not having an issue, and now they just buy for one.
Is this typical with CF family members ?
Namechangeymcnamechange11 · 18/11/2019 18:04
Ybvu to expect a gift or consider them 'skinflints'. It's a perfectly common and widely accepted thing to do these days.
It could have been worded better if it is as you say it is. Along the lines of "how about if we agree to only buy for the children?"
I feel sorry for your family member with how you've worded your post. You either dislike them or are incredibly materialistic and grabby.
pictish · 18/11/2019 18:04
I assume they’ve always bought a gift for you and dh in return?
Maybe the pennies just aren’t stretching like they used to...kids only get more expensive as they grow and if they’ve got three to provide Christmas for...
It might not be a case of cheekyfuckery but one of financial constraint.
Likethebattle · 18/11/2019 18:07
Your sibling probably finds the fact they have 3 children expensive e puff and no another person had been added in. We only buy for children in pit family now and no one is stamping feet of someone has 3 children (I childless but still buy for family children.
PinkiOcelot · 18/11/2019 18:07
I could have written your post OP. The exact same thing happened when I had my first DD 18 years ago. I’d been buying for DH’s sister, her husband and their 3 kids then as soon as I had DD it was buy for the kids only. Pissed me right off. Stingy bastards.
Newmumma83 · 18/11/2019 18:11
@NemophilistRebel morning was stopping you to suggest the same years ago.
13 years ago my brother had his first and we agreed that same rule ... I have only just had my first Child btw so he got off buying anything for 13 years ... but I wanted to spoil my nephew Christmas is about the kids and it saved me and my brother money that would couldn’t really afford
WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 18/11/2019 18:12
We only buy for the children in our family because that's all we can afford and even then it's a stretch. YABU and a CF to expect gifts from anybody.
Was that CF aimed at the family member whose three children have already had all the presents?
There's nothing wrong with buying for children only - just a tiny token gift if money is very tight - but it is not fair to change the goalposts when it suits you and your family. If you all agree to only buy for people up to the age of 18, then it stops for each person once they reach 18 and it doesn't stop for any person before they reach 18.
If two people between them have an hour timeslot for a fun activity and agree to take turns, half an hour each, the first person can't just go ahead and take their half-hour, and then say "We've got half an hour left - let's just have 15 minutes each."
Drum2018 · 18/11/2019 18:16
It's very common for families to do this. You got the raw end of the deal as you have bought for 3 kids for a few years and they still expect that you should do that while they buy one peresent for your one child. So what you do from now on is buy one board game (generic on from smiths) and 3 selection boxes - 3 for a fiver offer at most. Or you could give £15/20 cinema voucher with the selection boxes. I certainly wouldn't be buying 3 separate presents anymore.
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.