To feel angry when strangers touch my dd?

[IcingOnTheCake]

My dd is 10mths and it's lovely when people say how cute and pretty she is but why do they feel the need to touch her? People touch her hands, arms and face and i really don't like it. I just want to push them away and shout 'don't touch my baby!', i wouldn't do that of course, i just stand there and feel angry.

It always happens in supermarkets, especially at the checkout. Am i just a grump or is it ok for me to not want strangers touching my dd?

Oh yes, totally understandable in cases of allergies etc....must be honest though, if I see a cute baby on the bus and I coo and gently stroke cheek, I don't stop and think about contact allergies! Very good point that..

Oh jesus! People are just being friendly!
Perhaps you should share your feelings with every person that attempts touching your baby so that way they can learn how you feel or put a sign on your buggy saying

PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH MY BABY IT ANNOYS ME!

I was in a cafe today and DD (2.5) was playing with DS. A couple of grandparents told me their grandson (about 1, he was toddling in a harness) had kissed DD and they apologised. I said "that's OK" at which they mumbled something like "it shouldn't be encouraged". I was lost for words (actually I said "don't worry, she's vaccinated", nothing better came to mind).

cristina, am a bit [shocked] by their reaction, id have laughed and said to dd 'oh a little boyfriend' it's their way of showing affection, everyone kisses them, why shouldnt they kiss people they like?

Haven't read the whole thread but how very strange.....if you go to Turkey/Greece/Egypt the children get touched endlessly - not in a harmful way just squeezing of the foot, tickle on the cheek etc they absolutely adore children.

You really need to lighten up and appreciate that people are taking an interest in your baby.

i totally agree with you icinginthecake i hate people touching my children who i dont know it drives me mad and even worse when strangers kiss my baby makes my blood boil !!!!!!!!!!!

You know, there's something very familiar about all these comments: 'lighten up', 'don't be so uptight', 'you should be flattered' etc. They're often used by people attempting to defend themselves from accusations of date rape or sexual harassment.
This is NOT to say that someone tickling a baby's toes uninvited is any kind of molester or has any kind of evil intentions: what irritates me is the assumption that you just have to put up with unwanted attention from strangers, whether you;re an adult or a child, and if you;d rather be left alone either on a specific occasion or in general, then there must be something wrong with you.

I get this too, my dd gets patted on the head, her chin touched, her arms/hands touched, I hate it!

Ourghhhh I hate it too. I haven't got time to read all the thread but if anyone has a good defensive comeback without sounding rude, please tell me!

An old neighbour of ours stopped for a chat the other day - harmless and clean, but not a close friend iyswim. She obviously liked my 10 week old, but he was ASLEEP in his pram and she kept trying nervously to touch his chin, his cheek - I felt so mad. I really needed him to stay asleep, how dim can people be, I nearly had a fit!

But stood there feeling angry and never said a word.

DS (4) came up with something though...'Stop touching our baby!' (neighbour) 'Oh do you like your new brother?'
(DS) 'I'm not going anywhere NEAR you!!!!!'

at how rude people are being on here re the "baby-touchers"

flightattendant - I think that you could have said 'please don't touch him I want him to stay asleep' without seeming rude.

Cammelia - sorry if I offended you, I didn't mean it as though she meant any harm - I know she didn't, she's lovely but it was just the frustration that I couldn't think how to STOP her doing it...natural protective instinct, probably completely irrational, but it did make me feel very upset nonetheless.
Was just ranting, sorry.

I thought it was Ok to rant on this kind of thread

I think the feeling is actually fairly justified. I would never touch a stranger's face. Baby or not. Toes, maybe, if they had socks on and a close friend's child - but not their face. It's intrusive.

flightattendant, I didn't specifically mean you my darling. I think people forget how protective one feels about a very young baby, and at 10 weeks you do want them to stay asleep when they are don't you

I'm selfish too. His little soft face is..well...

MINE!!!!!

when my dd1 was little she was a magnet baby, everyone wanted to touch her. i would get so angry and narrowed it down to - please don't touch her on the face (it was absolutely impossible otherwise). twice strangers who talked to me tried to get to hold her!!!
if people were persistent about trying to touch her face (as in asking me why not etc) i would say - have you washed your hands? i always wash mine before i touch her face.

my dd2 is a gorgeious little girl but doesnt have that magnet effect on people so i know what your are talking about if you feel this is a special case. it really gets disturbing, not the time it takes up, but the thought that someone did who-knows-what with their fingers and then put them on your child's exposed skin which

I liked people being touchy-friendly (in a safe, appropriate way) to my two when they were babies. It reinforced my view that the world was basically a kindly place. And you usually have a pack of wipes around to give hands and cheeks a quite swipe if you are really worried about contamination. The babies seem to like it, too. They're physical little people.

Anyway, too much hygiene is bad for you--it's official! I loved our health visitor when she witnessed one of my terriers licking the baby's face and showed not a flicker of horror. (He still developed asthma, though. Perhaps the dog didn't lick hard enough.)

I think its weird.
I wouldnt touch a strangers baby.
Some old lady petted my baby recently when we were in the drs surgery waiting room.
She could have had something I dont want my baby to catch (like a cold or something). I dont care if I may have PFB syndrome, I just think its not done.

I have the opposite problem.

I dislike touching other people's babies, but feel (rightly or wrongly) that I am supposed to show affection by asking to cuddle. I only ask for very close friends/relatives' babies and promptly hand back after a suitable display.

Now I feel better about not bothering.

BTW, I have no problems with others holding and cuddling my babies. Babies are there to be cuddled, aren't they?

I agree with blueshoes, why ever would I want to pick up someone else's baby? I just don't get it. I am generally a touchy-feely person but hate that poo/sour milk smell they give off.

My babies always smelled of roses