Faffandahaff
My DCs went to a school where there was initially a complete phone ban/see it-lose-it policy. Parents had to come to the school to sign for confiscated phones if a phone was taken.
It generated massive umbrage in the community. Most parents gave their children phones so the kids could keep in touch after school on the often long walk home, or in the case of athletes, to get in touch when the team bus arrived back in school after a meet, and in the case of aspiring thespians, to contact when a rehearsal was over, etc. Every so often (about every other month) the local schools and police would issue a warning about men in vehicles trying to persuade students walking to or from school to get into the car with them.
Most parents didn't appreciate having to leave work early to get to the school at 3 to sign for a phone they had given so the students could communicate with them and vice versa.
So the school changed its policy. Phones were allowed. It didn't result in massive disruption, hundreds of daily pizza deliveries, or purchasing or selling of drugs over and beyond what was already happening just by word of mouth. Teachers had boxes in their classrooms into which phones were deposited at the start of each class. There was no massive uptick in bullying among teenage girls.
Meanwhile, a problem was emerging wrt detentions and how they were disproportionately handed out to African American students. A clarification of detention policy was undertaken (with a stepped approach, warnings, etc emphasised). Parents and teachers alike pointed out that detentions were not solving underlying problems, and exclusions from class (either in school or out of school exclusion) only resulted in students falling behind. Which helped no-one achieve their potential, and actually resulted in getting the backs of big groups of students and parents up...
'Whining' is one way of describing the disgruntlement that is a forerunner of positive change. The result of the complaints was a fairer system and acknowledgement by the school that its primary duty was to provide educational opportunities for all, regardless of how 'difficult' certain students were, or to put it more relevantly, regardless of how many difficulties certain students had. So detentions have fallen drastically, and suspensions too. Meaningful means of addressing lack of student engagement have been implemented in the form of social workers working with the counselor staff and deans. The school recommitted to working with parent groups in a respectful way and keeping on policing itself with the help of community groups so that equitable treatment of all students continues, as obliged by law as it turns out.
It's a more painful and difficult process than doubling down on the detentions and interdictions, but infinitely more productive.
Larrygrylls, I take it you haven't hosted a sleepover.