Should I tell them his stepson is a paedophile

[SisterhoodOfKahn]

My DD is a member of a youth organisation who has recently recruited a new full time member of staff. This man will have direct access to the children.

Should I tell the youth organisation that he is the step father of a paedophile? This is not tittle tattle I know the family, and know this is true.

I'm hoping he won't pass the DBS criteria but as they have different names he might.

Am I being over cautious? Should I just keep quiet. I genuinely don't know what do to.

[tomatoesandstew]

YANU to share the information confidentially with the safeguarding lead of the organisation.

It is their job to risk assess whether there is any issue with the risk of the individual.#

We have no idea what he was convicted of, but being sneaky, grooming and insinuating into contact with children by grooming adults is the way that some paedophiles work sadly.

Associating with a known sex offenders/ drug dealers is definitely a reason that you MAY be considered unfit to work with children and should be explained to staff and volunteers particuarly if you live with them/ socialise frequently with them - and MAY impact part of your fitness to work with children same as if stepson was a drug dealer etc. Priority is children's safety and this does mean that a professional should be making a judgement on risk to children.

It is the job of professionals to assess the risk not Mumsnet to prejudge that there is no risk.

[BrendasUmbrella]

Give them the information. If there is nothing to it, it won't affect his position

[Stinkycatbreath]

The DBS check does not take into consideration people who you may or may not be related to it checks you out only. You cant tarr him with the crimes of the step son you YABU.

[HUZZAH212]

Why wouldn't he pass the 'DBS criteria'? Unless he has a conviction himself. The law fortunately doesn't insist family members are 'red flagged' by association of individuals who've commited crimes. If they did we'd be very limited in regards of who in society could associate with anyone else in relation to a tentative connection. The person whose been hired can't be held culpable of someone else's crime - if he was we'd all be pretty fucked! (ie if my cousin was a convicted arsonist - therefore the council won't house me incase I set a property alight 🙄) You can't judge someone based on a completely different person's actions because they're not the same person (which presumably would be pretty obvious).

[tryingnottopanicrightnow]

Read the disqualified by association guidelines

[NachoFries]

@SisterhoodOfKahn OP if you know the family as well as you say you do, then surely you’d know whether or not the man in question is a pedophile? If you do not know and your object is solely because he is the stepfather of a pedophile then you’re definitely being unreasonable. If you think there is a strong chance that the pedophile will visit the stepfather’s place of work, which he shouldn’t really do unless he has kids who are registering at the youth organization, then yes you should raise it as a cause for concern providing you make it clear that the issue is the stepson having access to children on the pretext of visiting his stepfather.

[notangelinajolie]

So you know the family? Why don't you report yourself while you are at it

Seriously? Even members of the royal family are related to criminals. This is not your concern - since when has guilty by association been a crime?

[NerdyCurvyInkedandPervy]

@shouldhavecalleditoatabix If step son is actually a convicted sex offender he will be in the sex offender with very specific conditions not to go near children. This is managed by a specific police unit

Yeah, you'd think, right? My ex stepson was found guilty of rapes and sexual assaults against a child. He didn't serve any time in custody and came off the SOR after five teats, last month. He's now allowed to go where he likes and do what he likes, no restrictions. He's served his 'sentence' and has no restrictions anymore and can get on with his life. His victims, however....

[NerdyCurvyInkedandPervy]

*five years.

[HUZZAH212]

In all fairness you can try to safeguard your Dd by taking them to another organisation. Unfortunately you still can't guarantee they won't actually come into contact with a sex offender (or in this case not one but related to one). You can only be reassured they won't potentially come into contact with someone whose been caught and actually convicted of a crime.. As is life.

[jellycatspyjamas]

Associating with a known sex offenders/ drug dealers is definitely a reason that you MAY be considered unfit to work with children and should be explained to staff and volunteers particuarly if you live with them/ socialise frequently with them - and MAY impact part of your fitness to work with children same as if stepson was a drug dealer etc.

From looking at the guidelines linked to, it seems like that only now applies to people offering childcare in domestic settings, eg childminders. Assuming this person isn’t working from home there’s no reason he’d be excluded from working with children based on his SS’s actions.

OP can you say what your actual concern is about the person being employed? What makes him a risk to your child?

[BoomBoomsCousin]

You know the family so do you known the man’s attitude to his stepson’s actions? Is he inclined to downplay them and pretend it’s not something to be concerned about or is he vigilant and inclined to help his stepson refrain from offending? That would be what drove my decision on the matter.

If I trusted that he knew his stepson was a danger and knew how to minimize risk then I would be inclined to assume he would tell the institution what it needed to know and wouldn’t allow his stepson to use his position to the step son’s advantage. But if he tended to minimize and sweep it under the carpet or try to pretend it had never happened I would probably raise it with senior people at the institution and ask them how their safeguarding would ensure relatives of staff could not use their connection to gain access to youth at the organization.

[NickMyLipple]

Just putting it out there, surely the fact you know (which is actually completely irrelevant as the man you're questioning has actually done nothing wrong!) Is a protective factor for your daughter?

You could move your daughter to another organisation who has employed a sex offender or other criminal who has never been caught.... surely then she is at higher risk, as you're naive to the fact she could not be safe.

[Palaver1]

Wow you are being very judgemental..
Reminds me of a thread I once read of sisters and parents of a son who had done wrong how the whole community .Rejected and punished them for his crimes.
The sisters were in their teens.
The family didn’t deserve this.
God forbid you are ever associated with a complete no gooder
Do what you please.
You are very very unreasonable and a gossip
I can imagine you spreading this to other parents.

[Igotthemheavyboobs]

How do you know he didn't declare it to them anyway?

[Evenquieterlife33]

You don’t know the link, he could be the reason his son is an offender he could have no knowledge. But if I knew someone was committing crimes against children I would call the police. I would say your knowledge of the stepsons crimes is your first responsibility in this.

[Beebeezed]

Unsure why people are being so horrible to you op I think it’s a reasonable question. I would report to be honest.

[TheLittleDogLaughed]

OP - how do you know about the SS? Does he live with the man who’s got the job? If you know and it’s common knowledge then maybe the employers know. If the man lives with and / or has frequent contact with the SS I would also be concerned about the SS coming into contact with the kids or their details.

[SimonJT]

My sister and her husband have done time due to abusing their children.

So in your opinion does that mean I’m unsafe to be around my son and I shouldn’t pick him up from school?

As you know the man if you believe in guilt be association then it also means you’re not safe to be around children.

[tenmum]

What a nasty post

[BuildBuildings]

He's not a pedophile his son is. When you say you know he's a pedofile has he been convicted? Do they live in the same house?

[Palaver1]

It’s the stepson

[lowlandLucky]

How bloody dare you