To ask, if you have two or more children

[Monkeynuts18]

Is it harder going from zero to one child or one child to two children?

I have one (14 weeks old) and it really has been the hardest thing I’ve ever done. The first 6 weeks was hell on earth - I’m not sure I can imagine doing it again. Is it easier a second time round? Or is it even harder because you have a baby plus another child to look after?

Just interested!

I found having one child much easier. I have struggled more with 2 or 3 because with just my first I always got a lot of down time and head space, whereas with 2 or more sometimes you get no down time or head space at all. I found it easier to socialise and maintain friendships with one child too, and it was easier to find childcare for one child for nights out and even basic things like a haircut or trip to the dentists are much harder with more than one. I'm not very good at multitasking though, so I tend to deal with each child's needs one at a time instead of being able to deal with everything all at once.

The transition from zero to one is the hardest as life is never the same. Having a second is fine until they grow up and can't even breathe the same air or he in the same vicinity as each other,then the struggle is real everyday!!

I can't remember if going from 1-2 or 2-3 was hardest for us.

What I can say though is that 2 teenagers and a smaller child is incredibly hard. Makes the younger years seem like a doddle. Think of the long game. The baby years go by very fast.

I've only read the first page, but it makes me irrationally happy to see people saying that it gets easier.

Hang in there OP - I felt exactly the same as you at 14 weeks. DS is now nearly 8 months and it has gotten sooooo much better. 5-6 months was a bit of a turning point for us - I think my body finally accepted that it wasn't going to get more than a few hours of uninterrupted sleep for the foreseeable future!

I found the first, very very difficult. Everybody telling me to enjoy it because the early weeks are the best didn't help. (And it's a total lie) Second baby was a breeze. (2 year gap). 3rd was tricky but I knew I could do it. It gets easier op, hang in there.

There is nothing whatsoever stating that you have to have a second, if I found it hell on earth I wouldn’t repeat it. Seriously, just stick with one.

0-1 was the hardest leap for me, the next three just sort of slotted into my life and I didn’t find it as difficult. I found it tough becoming a parent and learning everything from scratch but once I had an idea of what to expect, it wasn’t tough. DC4 was the easiest of the lot, I just feel lots more relaxed with him.

From 1 to 2 is rough. 2 to 3 is easy. 3 to 4 was very hard.