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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

FIL wants me to wear a certain jacket WWYD?

229 replies

Flyingfish2019 · 05/11/2019 13:09

FIL is a somewhat quirky individual. While he has his strong points he can also be bossy and say offensive things.
He told me that he wanted our children to wear wool sweaters. I told him no, because you cannot even put them in the tumble drier. Then he wanted me to wear a certain type of jacket (the type ladies from his generation wear). He wanted to buy me one. I told him: no. He bought one in my size nevertheless and gave it to me as a present. WWYD?

OP posts:
Original poster
Flyingfish2019 · 05/11/2019 14:42

Have to add: he gives our children chocolate but thinks ketchup has to much sugar.

OP posts:
Alwayscheerful · 05/11/2019 14:42

Warmer not armed!

Disfordarkchocolate · 05/11/2019 14:46

Avoid unnecessary drama = allow control over my DILs body.

My very nice husband would tell his parent this wasn't appropriate. If that failed I'd take it to the charity shop.

Trewser · 05/11/2019 14:51

Ofgs

Just say thanks and laugh about it with your dh.

He's not trying to control your every move!

SchadenfiendeUnmortified · 05/11/2019 14:56

Buy him some skinny jeans with buttock cut outs.

Tell him you think he'll suit them.

Tell him that you will wear the jacket when he comes round in his jeans, and the two of you can go clubbing/for coffee.

FizzyGreenWater · 05/11/2019 14:56

'Jacket? What jacket? I don't remember you giving me any jacket...' puzzled face.

He's weird, just out-weird him. Out weird him and be vague at every turn. He'll end up leaving you alone.

Oneborneverydecade · 05/11/2019 14:57

unless your FIL is Alexander McQueen, he can SOD OFF

Shopping from beyond the grave?

nokidshere · 05/11/2019 15:01

No, he does not have a cloth fetish. He has a telling-other-people-what-to-do fetish. For example he also told me never to give the children ketch-up/tomato sauce because it has to much sugar... or not to drink latte machiatto or buy ready made guacamole because it is a rip-off.

But what's the problem? He can tell you what he likes but you don't have to do it.

And in all your examples above he's quite right. Just smile and ignore.

Alsohuman · 05/11/2019 15:02

I can’t believe people are suggesting sending a brand new £200+ jacket to the charity shop.

HighNetGirth · 05/11/2019 15:02

You are doing this all wrong, OP.
Tell him you need a new house with a massive laundry room and a top of the range washing machine with a hand wash programme, then you will wear wool jumpers. As for the Barbour jacket, you are very happy to wear it once you’ve got a Jaguar shooting brake to go with it. Otherwise, it would just look odd.

SchadenfiendeUnmortified · 05/11/2019 15:04

Oh - it's a Barbour jacket.

Well, we know from another thread what overpriced crap they are - a simple cat walking past can leave them full of holes . . .

Nousernameforme · 05/11/2019 15:04

Whats not to love? They smell awful and feel funny.

I remember back in my primary days a child had one and every time i had to line up next to him I had to face the other way. I can still remember the smell Envy Not envy

DarlingNikita · 05/11/2019 15:08

He told me that he wanted our children to wear wool sweaters.
Not his fucking business and I'd tell him so. I actually agree with him though, man-made fibres are vile

Re: the jacket, eBay it.

imclaustrophobicdarren · 05/11/2019 15:09

@BumbleBeee69 and even he's dead Grin

diddl · 05/11/2019 15:11

Did you say anything when he gave you the jacket?

Give the jacket away & tell him that you have when he asks.

BertrandRussell · 05/11/2019 15:15

I don’t understand. How did the conversation about jackets occur?

Member984815 · 05/11/2019 15:17

Sell it and get something you like

Fakeflowersaremynewnormal · 05/11/2019 15:18

What are his strong points you mentioned?

Quellium · 05/11/2019 15:20

I had one as a child and I can still remember the smell, 30 years on. I wouldn't buy one for that reason.

Sounds like a massive control issue here. The women in his life should conform to his wishes and ideals at all times.

MaybeitsMaybelline · 05/11/2019 15:20

Ok so if he was buying me an anorak I would be very cross but I would happily take expensive woollen jumpers and Barbour jackets thank you. If whilst he is at it he wants to throw in some Dubarry boots to finish the look Go for it FIL.

Original poster
Flyingfish2019 · 05/11/2019 15:25

@BetrandRussel Well, I have a The North Face jacket and he always told me it did not look good on me and I should buy something that looked better... and he kept telling me to buy a Barbour jacket and I kept telling him: no, I am happy with my jacket.

OP posts:
Original poster
Flyingfish2019 · 05/11/2019 15:29

@Fakeflowersaremynewnormal: Well, dh has mental health problems and he thought he was a disappointment for his family... and his father took much time to talk to him and tell him he was not.

He also is generous with money, send his children to good schools and later tried to help them in their jobs whenever he could.
That are his strong points.

OP posts:
Orchidflower1 · 05/11/2019 15:34

Omg is Barbour having a weird sort of marketing ploy through MN???? 🤷🏾‍♀️

INeedNewShoes · 05/11/2019 15:45

Second thread in a week about a Barbour jacket. I still wouldn't know one if I saw one. Off to Google...

TheMustressMhor · 05/11/2019 15:47

Is there really a Barbour troll on here?