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AIBU?

in thinking that 'english' weddings are a nightmare?

85 replies

cylon · 16/08/2007 17:14

so many rules and regulations. so much money spent.no one enjoying themselve. everyone s toes stepped on.
i havent heard a single post on here with something positive to say about weddings.
why?

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footprints · 16/08/2007 17:15

Depends on the wedding - ours was FAB!

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cylon · 16/08/2007 17:15

i love weddings. the colours, the atmosphere. the people, the joy of two people joing there life together. the clothes. the money spent. the food. the kids running riot. the dancing.
it's all great fun. imo

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belgo · 16/08/2007 17:16

agree cylon.

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cylon · 16/08/2007 17:17

fp, but what are all these rules?
evening invitations only?
no kids?
forking out for hotel rooms?
wedding lists?
lack of food?
keep the date cards ffs?

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Hulababy · 16/08/2007 17:18

Agree it depends on the wedding. I like fun, relaxed, less-formal family/friends based weddings. Cylon - your description sounds a good one

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saltire · 16/08/2007 17:18

I must admit I was at an English wedding and all the guests went home after the meal and changed in to jeans and t-shirts.

Scottish weddings on the other hand, alll the guest stay in whatever they had on at the church and stay there all night dancing!

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nailpolish · 16/08/2007 17:19

cylon, you need to read morningpapers thread on her wedding

and i agree with saltire about scottish weddings - they are the best!

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cylon · 16/08/2007 17:21

saltire, ive never been to a scottish wedding . sounds fun.
i'm off to a hindu wedding on sat. really looking forward to it. dh has refused to go. so just me and dd.

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footprints · 16/08/2007 17:21

I agree with you actually cylon. We decided to make our wedding really relaxed - no rules Everyone had a great time, and so did I.
I hate weddings with no kids, seating plans and stuff like that. People get really uptight and miss the whole point of the day.

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CountessDracula · 16/08/2007 17:21

forking out for hotel rooms?? Surely at all weddings one must have a place to rest one's weary head at the end of the day!

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unknownrebelbang · 16/08/2007 17:23

Bit of a sweeping statement really.

"English" weddings vary from two people getting married at a registry office, literally dragging two people off the street to act as witnesses to the full-blown fairytale, no expense spared, type.

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motherinferior · 16/08/2007 17:26

DP's brother's four-day Muslim posho extravaganza sounds a bit of a PITA to me too, though.

And yep, that was his first wedding

I have been to a couple of nice weddings in my time, although needless to say at least one of those weddings - and one not so fab one - led to divorce. (It would be three weddings but I missed the first wedding of one of my friend, made it to her second one, am duly expecting invitation to her third at some point.)

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Roseylea · 16/08/2007 17:29

I went to an Indian wedding reception recently with Bollywood karaoke and the most fantastic chocolate fountain [yummmmmmmm].

Weddings can bring out the worst in people and expose all the cracks a in a family but I still think thee's something very lovely about standing there in front of everyone and saying your vows...very special.

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MrsCellophane · 16/08/2007 17:29

Because the whole point of them isn't as meaningful nowadays, in the case of all those who co-habit prior to marriage!

Blimey, that G&T has made me really cntroversial!

(Ours was fab, btw, v traditional, lots of pomp but everyone enjoyed it) (but yes, probably toes stepped on somewhere along the way)

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cylon · 16/08/2007 17:29

unknown, not only a sweeping statement, but racist too.
i just didnt know how else to say it really. please feel free to give a name to the sorts of weddings i am talking about. you know the ones i mean.
cd, whats wrong with kipping on somewones sofa, or sleepig bag on the carpet? at dsisters wedding my parents had sttaying in their house,, four children, two son's in law, three grandchildren, at least ten neices nephews, one or two siblings? and seven friends. yes they have a big house.but it was still sleeping bags, and queues for the toilets. (four bathrooms one toilet)
pllus aunts anduncles had some rellies to stay.
why force people to fork out for rooms in hotels?

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cylon · 16/08/2007 17:33

ooo, dont get me started on chocolate fountains... any bride who wants to have a chocolate fountain should include dry cleaning tickets with her invites! but my kids love them. (hence the dry cleaning . the would come up to me, in my pure silk outfit, faces smeared with chocolate and joy........

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nailpolish · 16/08/2007 17:33

nobody is forced to do anything
they get an invitation, not a gun to their head

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Roseylea · 16/08/2007 17:34

Errr..yes, it did get a bit messy and drippy! (and the dc weren't even there! )

I was eyeing them up in Lakeland for £25 on a somewhat smaller scale. I'd expand to the size of a baby elephant of course...

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cylon · 16/08/2007 17:35

yes np, but a lot of the threads on mn make it out as if they do have a gun to their heads.

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cylon · 16/08/2007 17:35

rosy, stay away..... far far away.

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nailpolish · 16/08/2007 17:37

jesus, i hope i dont get invited to a wedding like that then

bridezilla, etc

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RedFraggle · 16/08/2007 17:38

Don't know which weddings you go to Cylon, but I haven't been to an unenjoyable one yet! I've been to several "English", one scottish and an Italian. All were lovely.
Rules and regs aren't really carved in stone are they? Evening only is for if you have a huge family and can't afford to have EVERYONE at the daytime function surely. I understand this to be that places are limited but that the person issuing the invite still wants me to be a part of their celebration. Not all weddings involve staying in a hotel - but for some people that is part of the fun.
I love weddings and go with the idea that it is an honour to be asked and you should try to respect your hosts wishes.

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CountessDracula · 16/08/2007 17:39

surely no-one forces people to pay for hotel rooms - it is up to them if they can arrange to kip on someone's floor (god give me a hotel room any day over that!)

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cylon · 16/08/2007 17:43

gosh its good to hear your opinions.
i love weddings. haven t yet been to one i didnt enjoy. but hearing some of the stuff onemn makes me feel sad

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Othersideofthechannel · 16/08/2007 17:43

The speeches (when well thought through) are the best part of the traditional English wedding.
You don't get these in French weddings which means if you only know one of the couple well, you don't really know them any better after the event.
But the food is better in France!

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