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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Dinner at childminders

83 replies

Paperyfish · 22/10/2019 20:17

My dd (7) has started at junior school in September and goes to a childminder one afternoon after school when I work later. She’s there till 6.30. I pay the childminder and additional £6 to give her tea ( dinner/ supper - what ever regional word you use for her evening meal) not just a snack. She takes a packed lunch to school so I wanted her to have a decent, substantial meal in the evening. The childminder often gives them things such as a toasted bagel with honey or scotch pancakes or a banana sandwich. She says my dd wanted these and eats them. I think most of the other kids have a hot lunch at school- so I guess I understand that they might find this acceptable...but I don’t think it’s really fair if I’m paying extra for an actual meal. I’d regard these things as a hefty after school snack. Am I being a bit precious? Would it be appropriate for me to request she has a proper meal even if the others aren’t? It doesn’t need to be fancy or complex- jacket potatoes and beans, fish fingers and mash, pasta and sauce, omelettes and salad etc kind of things. Quick after schools type basic meals. Am I being unreasonable to insist or are bread based toasty sort of things generally accepted as a meal for 7 years olds after school? And do you think these meals are worth an extra £6? As I’m thinking I might as well just do her a second lunch box!

OP posts:
Littlebluebird123 · 22/10/2019 20:20

I don't think you're being unreasonable at all.
£6 for a bagel??
Could you pay for a school dinner and send dd with a packed lunch? School dinners here are £2.20 so you'd be saving too.

HTruffle · 22/10/2019 20:20

I wouldn’t be all that happy with that, as you say more of a snack than a meal. Not much nutrition in there at all. And for £6 she’s making a tidy profit after buying a pack of 5 bagels for about £1!

formerbabe · 22/10/2019 20:22

An extra £6 a day?

lostfrequencies · 22/10/2019 20:22

YANBU!

GrumpyHoonMain · 22/10/2019 20:22

The childminder’s taking the piss. Tell her you want a proper meal or you will take your money elsewhere

LoisLittsLover · 22/10/2019 20:22

Would your dd want a different meal to the other children - mine would choose the 'lunchy' type option everytime over a hot meal

missmapp · 22/10/2019 20:22

When my dc were with their cm, I used to make a pasta bake or something and she would hea t it up for them. This was as well as after school snacks she would provide ( like the 'meals you describe ) this was not charged for. Could you do something similar ? Doesn't seem worth £6 but it depends on your contract.

parrotonmyshoulder · 22/10/2019 20:22

£6!! Our childminder charges £2 for a meal and makes sure it’s something hot, substantial, balanced and that the children will eat. Thank goodness! They have tea with her 3 times a week and packed lunch at school.

EmmiJay · 22/10/2019 20:23

Banana sandwich? Bagel? What what what?? Your childminder is either a cheeky goat or she can't cook.

Passthecake30 · 22/10/2019 20:24

Can she have a school dinner that day? I guess if the others are having that snack type food she might feel left out if she has something different?
Does everyone pay the £6 for the banana sandwhich etc?
Tbh I'd be tempted to provide a meal the cminder could heat up, lasagne, pasta and bolognaise sauce etc. Or stop the £6, provide a substantial snack and cook something quickly like jacket pot and cheese on that evening.

Thesearmsofmine · 22/10/2019 20:25

YANBU at all. Did you discuss what kind of meals she would be given when she started?

Paperyfish · 22/10/2019 20:25

@littlebluebird123 I’d love her to have school dinners- but she’s desperate to have packed lunches like her friends and as it’s a new school I’ve given in on that one!

OP posts:
Starlight456 · 22/10/2019 20:26

Cm here and my response is 😮.

£6 for a bagel. Did cm previously work at a nursery. I ask this as the ones I know who do a snack type tea worked in nursery and do a cooked meal at lunch.

However £6 for a bagel. 😱.

I agree can you swap to hot dinner at school?

GreatestShowUnicorn · 22/10/2019 20:28

I'm a childminder and she's taking the piss! Tell her you want her to have a proper meal and that you are happy to provide it if she can't.

FunnysInLaJardin · 22/10/2019 20:28

I'd sack the CM dinner and feed her when you get home tbh. 7pm shouldn't be too late for a 7yo

Scarydinosaurs · 22/10/2019 20:29

for £6 that isn’t reasonable.

Even a microwave style meal one day a week would be better!

I’d say please could she switch to a proper meal OR you’ll stop paying the £6 and you’ll supply the food. Ridiculous.

PumpkinP · 22/10/2019 20:29

A banana sandwich? Didn’t even know that was a thing Confused

Paperyfish · 22/10/2019 20:31

I did discuss meals at the outset- as she made it clear they were extra. She said things like pasta bake, jacket potatoes, Shepard’s pie etc. I think I’m going to have to say something...I just wanted to check this wasn’t the norm as I’ve never used a child minder before.

OP posts:
Blubluboo · 22/10/2019 20:36

YANBU! How hard is it for her to prepare a meal for her? She could even make a bolognese and freeze in to about 6 kids sized portions and your child have it each week as she is only there 1 day. £6 for a bagel is ridiculous. She could get a whole pack for £1! I would expect bagel etc... to be included in normal childminder costs tbh!

Also side note... to the poster who said they didn't know a banana sandwich was a thing... I thought everyone had tried it growing up?! Haha

purpleme12 · 22/10/2019 20:36

I don't know I think it completely depends. The one that I know does a snacky type one for the evening meal. Which is what I personally would expect for the evening one. But I agree that £6 is too much for this snacky meal!

CalamityJune · 22/10/2019 20:41

£6 for that is extortionate, even for a homecooked meal. Sounds like you have had the conversation that you want a cooked meal, not a second cold snack. Not sure why she is accepting your money and disregarding your wishes.

firawla · 22/10/2019 20:41

£6 for a banana sandwich - she could get 3 full loaves and 3 bags of bananas for that. How can she even justify this?? No. She’s taking the pee

TheSubtleArt · 22/10/2019 20:42

YANBU

Especially with colder weather coming up. Your DC needs a substantial meal. Even pizza or fajitas would be more substantial than scotch pancakes/ bagel!

I would press for it and as others have said £6 for any of those sorts of snacks is a complete pisstake.

GuessWhoColeen · 22/10/2019 20:43

I would definately make my DD have a hot lunch at school (except maybe just before the summer holidays when it is warmer) and give her a snack for the C.M.

Sunshine196 · 22/10/2019 20:46

That's terrible! I'm a CM & make meals for my afterschool kids. I've toyed with doing snacks but to be honest I think it's cheaper & easier to do a meal such as home made chicken soup/mince etc/pasta just chuck it all in the slow cooker in the morning. For £6 I could feed all of my kids never mind one! I would say something to her about it. YANBU.