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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Help... I’ve done something really stupid

67 replies

LionsShare · 18/10/2019 20:12

I text my ex asking him out on a date.

He hasn’t replied yet and I just want to crawl into a hole or burn my phone so I never know the answer.

Clearly I have been unreasonable, so how do I graciously style this out when he inevitably replies no? I can’t even blame being drunk, haven’t had a drink all week. I miss him and have had a shit day so thought this would make me feel better!?

OP posts:
RoseHippy1 · 18/10/2019 20:15

Don’t worry , we’ve all done stuff like this. He’s your ex so it doesn’t really matter what he thinks / if you’ve embarrassed yourself . He’s your ex for a reason ! Go out tonight with mates ?!

something2say · 18/10/2019 20:15

Oh God.

You're sure he will say no??

GettingABitDesperateNow · 18/10/2019 20:16

Just be honest, reply back and say actually it was a mistake, no reflection on him at all but youd had a bad day and were trying to make yourself feel better but you realise you went about it the wrong way and you're sorry?

Otherwise pretend you were pissed anyway.

Or messge again saying 'oops wrong Simon!'

Wavingwhiledrowning · 18/10/2019 20:16

Can you pretend it was meant for someone else? Before he has chance to reply, send something like 'ha ha Ex! Oops. Not meant for you (clearly). Stupid phone'. I regularly blame errors of judgement like that on technology.

MissConductUS · 18/10/2019 20:16

Text again and say it was meant for another bloke.

Sexnotgender · 18/10/2019 20:16

Did you name him in the text?

Text him again and say you’re so embarrassed that was meant for someone else.

Batshittery · 18/10/2019 20:16

He may say yes. Fingers crossed.

Bourbonbiccy · 18/10/2019 20:20

Please don't do the "it was meant for someone else, he really won't believe it" just txt now before he replays saying, "sorry, shit day and it was a bad idea, just ignore it"

Bellringer · 18/10/2019 20:22

Just ignore it. He might say yes if he wants a shag, then what will you Do?

Bourbonbiccy · 18/10/2019 20:22

Before he replies not replays. And the " we're meant to stop after "it was meant for someone else" ...bad post !!

SickySicky · 18/10/2019 20:23

Block him and forget about it.

Oneborneverydecade · 18/10/2019 20:24

Get steaming drunk now so that if he calls you have a great excuse

Loopytiles · 18/10/2019 20:24

Why is he an ex?

catwithnohat · 18/10/2019 20:24

Argggh!

Put it down to experience and try to move on.

And delete his number Grin

Elclr · 18/10/2019 20:28

Oh, I'm sure we've all been there. Block his number and get yourself a drink. Lesson learned and no harm done in the grand scheme of things FlowersSmile

Dominoz · 18/10/2019 20:30

Don't worry. You've put yourself out there and he'll be flattered and you'll have an answer one way or another. Good on you! How long ago did you message?

Tangledfred · 18/10/2019 20:31

Just say sorry was having a bad moment and don’t really want to get back together. Bow out gracefully with minimum chat and fuss. Block his number or delete it so you don’t get tempted again

Loopytiles · 18/10/2019 20:36

I asked an (awful!) ex to get back together once, to his face, and was turned down.

It was five minutes of horrible embarrassment, he got an ego boost he didn’t deserve, but no harm done.

CAG12 · 18/10/2019 20:39

Id just be honest. If he replies saying yes or no, just say it was a moment of weakness.

Unless you actually want a date that is

GabsAlot · 18/10/2019 20:40

JUST SAY OOPS WRONG NUMBER!

KarmaStar · 18/10/2019 20:42

Do you want to go on a date with him?

HobbyIsCodeForDogging · 18/10/2019 20:43

Trying to pretend it was for someone else is way more cringe than asking him in the first place. Can't believe people are seriously suggesting that Blush

holidays987 · 18/10/2019 20:43

Go out tonight with friends if you can. Laugh it off, dance away the embarrassment and don't think about it again. Keep the ex in the past.

SpinneyHill · 18/10/2019 20:46

If you fancy a shag/date then see him if not ignore any text or say Shit sorry I was having a moment.

Most of us have done it or at least thought about it....the rest are lying

YANBU

Notthetoothfairy · 18/10/2019 20:46

I would do nothing, if you miss him and genuinely want to get back together (it sounds like your regret is because he might say no, rather than because you don’t want to get back together). If he says no, at least you know and there’s a chance he won’t.