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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To call out everyone who puts kisses on their post xxxxxx?

228 replies

NoDontLookAtMeImShy · 17/10/2019 10:12

It's really annoying. It's making Mumsnet something it isn't.

All these posts from "Mummytojakeandkayleighxx"
Ooh I love that hun xx

Makes me feel like flouncing.
But I still get loads of out of being here.

But the Troubles in Netmums have bought it all over here.

OP posts:
dontgobaconmyheart · 17/10/2019 18:22

OP you're sounding a bit too invested . What places you to 'call out' anyone - based on what? Confused your disapproval?

The snide mockery of 'hun' 'xxx' and whatever else on here is so unpleasant and largely classist in nature anyway- people need to really consider the root cause of their objections and get on with their own lives rather than placing such heavy judgement markers on things like this in order to feel above or better than person b.

Hardly anyone on here ever does it anyway relatively, and I'm sure some do xxx's by accident because mumsnet is a casual bit of internet fun that doesn't have their undivided attention, and they forget it's not a text. I don't use 'hun' or the oft mocked stuff on here in my real life but neither do I think it's big and clever to say things like 'cunty fucker' and 'cockwomble' and I don't speak like that either. You are not a better kind of woman if you use certain terminology and the rhetoric on here over language that is often class based does my head in sometimes. It's like mean girls at school.

NeverMindHunxxx · 17/10/2019 18:24

someone who might genuinely be able to offer help and support

And

is put off by that sort of problem.

These two shouldn't even be in the same sentence.

If someone has the intention of offering genuine help and support, they should be able to look past the travesty that is spelling and grammar mistakes and offer what they have, to help the situation at hand.
Unless you mean the spelling mistakes make reading and comprehension difficult for the potential helper, which I doubt is what you mean because "could of" is quite easy to decipher what the writer meant, in context.

RolytheRhino · 17/10/2019 18:24

I also don't swear in real life (much) but cocklodger is an excellent piece of terminology and needs to be added to the dictionary.

Bourbonbiccy · 17/10/2019 18:26

But during that time there was no huns and hubs, it was cunts and fucks and it's a travesty that that might change.

So you stick to your swearing with others that like that, others can say Hun or hubs and some can say neither but we can all still "cohabit" in the forum happily discussing interesting or funny things.

Most people see it that it's ok for people to be different.

NoSauce · 17/10/2019 18:27

It’s the million word paragraph that I find hard to read. Any suggestions of putting them in when on such a thread is met by the busy bodies who think it’s a put down.

It isn’t. It would be easier to read that’s all. It’s not a slur, it’s just a genuine request.

PortiaCastis · 17/10/2019 18:31

Conversely it is off putting to new posters who are desperate for help to know they'll be harshly judged for any typing or grammatical errors, not everyone is from the UK not everyone is able to post grammatically correct sentences, some people struggle because of dyslexia yet because they put a X they are deemed to have invaded from a other site and will in the future be scared to post anything in case they're pulled apart.
How is all the judgement helping anyone

HermioneWeasIey · 17/10/2019 18:47

I just think everybody who starts these (fucking boring) threads every week are over invested. It's a forum. You don't own it. Who actually has enough time to worry about this shit? Confused

I wouldn't put an x at the end of a post myself (even though I am of that generation), but the only time I hate to see it is when an OP has wrote a really sad post, desperate for support. Because I know within 10 posts, some heartless witch will come along and berate them for it, ignoring their actual post. Which helps absolutely nobody - just makes the OP feel even worse, and identifies them as a massive twat.

Sparkletastic · 17/10/2019 18:52

I'm with you OP. I value MN for its invigoratingly brusque tone.

Franklymydearidontgiveadam · 17/10/2019 18:55

Let people do what the fuck they want. Jeeeese at least they aren't trolling or bullying.

2018SoFarSoGreat · 17/10/2019 19:34

I don't like the x sign off because of a significant horrible MN trolling Incident where the bastard man signed off on all of his (very, very heartbreaking) posts with kisses. Seeing them on here always makes me think it is him again, and makes me wary. There has been a sharp increase recently, but I am aware only because of this association.

I have felt a 'softening' of the average poster, a kindness that was not previously here. I like it. It is more gentle, but equally honest and supportive. I have not felt a lack of arse kicking when required. I like that too.

We are who we are. I'm grateful to be here, so thank you to all of you, whoever you are.

RolytheRhino · 17/10/2019 19:42

We are who we are. I'm grateful to be here, so thank you to all of you, whoever you are.

Aww. That made me feel all warm inside. Thank you to you too. Smile

PortiaCastis · 17/10/2019 20:13

We are who we are. I'm grateful to be here, so thank you to all of you, whoever you are.

Thank you for some common sense and for not being an arsehole

tillytrotter1 · 17/10/2019 22:12

“Call out”? You mean tell them you don’t like it?

I refer to 'call out' as the Heidelberg response, such an idiotic phrase.

Dislocatedeyeballs · 17/10/2019 22:55

Sending u lots of xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Aroundnabout1 · 17/10/2019 22:58

YABU x

Greenleaveslaughing · 17/10/2019 23:07

What’s with this snobbery against Netmums ? It’s kind of weird
I assume it’s the same format as this, with some obviously made up threads, professional writers and complainers like myself.

The unreasonable part is not so much the kisses on all the posts, but the thinly veiled snobbery really.

Who cares! Life is really too short.

sparkles07 · 17/10/2019 23:13

"NM is huns, bubs, huns and kisses which is why I fucking hate it don't use that forum.
I use this forum because it's straight forward, say it how it is, and you don't get banned for swearing like you're at school."

While I won't be calling out the huns and xxx's that Are recently flooding the forum, I do agree with what OP wrote above!

RueCambon · 17/10/2019 23:17

I don't care. I've been on mumsnet since Methuselah was a lad and I just don't care. At times, a x can soften a blunt post. ie, why would he value you if you don't value yourself x
It's so cliche to give out about x at the end of a post x

RueCambon · 17/10/2019 23:18

@Greenleaveslaughing I agree so completely Brew

Kleptronic · 17/10/2019 23:38

People like to have a tribe, a group, a 'we', an 'us' and of course in order to have those you have to have a 'them'.

RueCambon · 17/10/2019 23:46

So true. And people without a strong sense of themself buy into that "othering"

EmeraldShamrock · 18/10/2019 00:03

We are who we are. I'm grateful to be here, so thank you to all of you, whoever you are
My faith in humanity on the thread has been restored.
OP just ignore it hunz xxx sending you lots of hugs babz xxxxx Grin

ReggaetonLente · 18/10/2019 00:05

The "calling out" crap is much more annoying

CrazyOldBagLady · 18/10/2019 00:12

Call out wanker alert

Thehagonthehill · 18/10/2019 00:28

I agree that AIBU used to be brutal but also that most of the posts were AIBU.
Now anything appears there and far from being kinder where as the vipers used to put the boot in some posters now have hammered nails into them first.