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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed with SIL?

129 replies

Pineapple1 · 13/10/2019 15:26

So, I have a few days off next week, next chance I have to spend some alone time with the family will be Christmas after next week.

My other half has decided to agree to look after our nephew because SIL didn't think to organise childcare.(it's half-term).
No offer to pay for anything either. And my other half knew I was 100% against this happening and I saw it coming from a mile away.

So, now I cannot go away with my family, Im stuck looking after a child I shouldn't have too.

AIBU to be really annoyed?

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 13/10/2019 15:28

I don't understand. Why can't you go and your partner takes care of the child.

Cocolapew · 13/10/2019 15:28

No your oh is going to look after his nephew, he offered not you.

DriftingLeaves · 13/10/2019 15:29

You don't have to look after the child. Your husband does. Not your problem.

Frustratedandscaredmum · 13/10/2019 15:29

Don't do it contact silly and tell her you have other plans.

weltenbummler · 13/10/2019 15:29

I think you should be annoyed with your other half rather than your SIL!

EL8888 · 13/10/2019 15:29

I would just refuse and stick to your plan to visit your family. Your partner shouldn’t make promises or agreements on your behalf.

Hederex · 13/10/2019 15:29

YADNBU but I'd be way more pissed off with your DP than your SIL.
I'd be tempted to tell him you're going away as planned and he can make his own arrangements.

Frustratedandscaredmum · 13/10/2019 15:30

Sorry sil not silly

TellMeWhoTheVilliansAre · 13/10/2019 15:30

You have plans. Your OH offered to mind his nephew. So, he minds his nephew and if it turns out he can’t he lets his sister know he forgot about other plans and is no longer in a position to mind him.

WorraLiberty · 13/10/2019 15:31

My other half has decided to agree to look after our nephew because SIL didn't think to organise childcare

So, now I cannot go away with my family, Im stuck looking after a child I shouldn't have too.

That doesn't make any sense?

TellMeWhoTheVilliansAre · 13/10/2019 15:31

By the way...she did organise childcare, she asked her brother.

ThanosSavedMe · 13/10/2019 15:31

You can still go away. Your do offered childcare. You have other plans.

Bluntness100 · 13/10/2019 15:32

Why are people assuming the partner is Male? Haven't we moved past this by now?

fedup21 · 13/10/2019 15:33

My other half has decided to agree to look after our nephew because SIL didn't think to organise childcare.(it's half-term)

But what has that got to do with you?

NailsNeedDoing · 13/10/2019 15:33

I'd be pissed off in your situation too. All you can do is let your OH know he's on his own with doing the childcare and make some plans for yourself.

Bluntness100 · 13/10/2019 15:34

The op also doesn't state their own gender. Seriously depressing in this day and age people assume heterosexual couples.

Op, Did your partner know you had something planned? And as said, why can't you still go?

TellMeWhoTheVilliansAre · 13/10/2019 15:34

Why are you annoyed at your SIL?

Velveteenfruitbowl · 13/10/2019 15:35

@Bluntness100 I think it’s the implied implication that OP will end up doing the childcare because she’s female.

Bluntness100 · 13/10/2019 15:37

did The op also imply the partner was Male?

Don't defend the indefensible.

Original poster
Pineapple1 · 13/10/2019 15:37

I love how many of you have just assumed my gender.

I'm the husband in this story.

I have a 1 year old child, which my wife will be spending the time with. Therfore I have to now figure out what to do to keep a 7 year old busy.

I had planned to take my wife and child away for a few days, which is now cancelled because I have to be available for a 7am drop off, and a 5pm child delivery....

OP posts:
Sheld0r · 13/10/2019 15:38

Agree with PP, tell your OH that you're still going ahead with your plans to see your family and they are on their own looking after your nephew. You didn't agree to this when you booked time off work so it's their problem.

Bluntness100 · 13/10/2019 15:38

Apparently it was implied you were a woman op.

Sigh.

LordNibbler · 13/10/2019 15:39

No one can make you do it. They agreed to look after the child even when your feelings on it were known. So, don't do it. It's really not your problem. It's your OH's problem to sort out. And if you do end up doing it, well it's really no one elses fault but your own.

TellMeWhoTheVilliansAre · 13/10/2019 15:40

What difference does it make. Male or female?

The partner offered a service. The partner provides it, or let’s the SIL know it’s not possible due to previous plans.

No need for “sighs” and no need to be annoyed at SIL.

fedup21 · 13/10/2019 15:41

I am totally confused.

You have taken some days holiday to spend with your wife and daughter next week, yes?

But your wife has arranged for YOU to spend these days looking after your nephew instead?! Is this child on her side of the family or yours?

Does your wife not actually want you to come on holiday with her?

Why are you pissed off with your SIL and not your wife??????