AIBU to have been sarky to DP about doritos

[gwackywacky]

NC because his mums on here.
I decided to make us nachos which I then regretted because messing around with making chili, guacamole, salsa, grating cheese etc was really pissing me off when I just wanted to chill today actually.

So Im at final stage laying it all out and melting the cheese on top when dp comes behind me and rubs his hands down my sides (ugh) and then steals a posh dorito (UGH) and says 'these any good then?'. I didnt reply and he said 'oh yeah, they ARE good!' and i said 'im so relieved they meet his majestys standards'.

Then we had an argument, he accused me of being sarky, and I said I was pissed off at having to cook on a sunday actually. Btw, if I didnt cook his solution would probably be a bowl of cereal (slow clap).

Who wants to see Mr MitziK and gwacky go head to head in the nacho event in the next Olympics?

Round 1, Speed prep
Round 2, Angry assembly
Round 3, Slow clap

OP your husband is nacho problem. Something more is bothering you! Take a chilli pill

I tried!

@MitziK
Wow! You have Saturday- and Sunday-specific meals? Whats Tuesday then? Is that like soup only day or something?

If it was a normal Dorito I'd say to log with 101, get your ducks in a row and give your head a wobble before booking a short break to the Sistine Chapel to recover.

But it was a posh Dorito OP, you can't fuck about with this shit. LTB.

I hate being touched / hugged from behind when cooking. I think there was a whole thread about this a while ago.

YANBU reasonable about that. Maybe a little bit unreasonable about the nachos.

Actually I think he’s a lazy fucker and OP wants a bit of peace - nothing worse than being gripped while your hands are busy putting the dinner together.

He could’ve helped. I hope he’s washing up

@JesusInTheCabbageVan

Hahaha! "Angry assembly" is such a perfect description of the competitive meal planning / ease of cooking that nobody I know IRL does

Last time I ‘made’ nachos it was: Doritos (plain), Dorito sauce, grated cheese and jalapeños. No faffing around.

Surely nachos is what you make when you have some leftover chilli and want something quick and easy for tea? I wouldn't be faffing about making guacamole and salsa though. Thats what M&S was invented for. They do good tortilla crisps too.

@GreenTulips
Thank you. My logic is first of all, dont "nick" food when someone is preparing it. I cant explain why but this annoys me. And second of all, stop touching me when I'm trying to mash a fairly hard avocado because....well that's just annoying.

If you hate being touched while cooking, have you made this clearly known to the toucher that the touchee doesn't like it or is he expected to be a mind reader like most DHs and DPs on here seem to be?

Clearly (by your OP) he meant well but there's something about your reaction (based on your OP) that suggests you're becoming increasingly irritated by him and you should have a candid conversation with him, not come here expecting others to slag him off with you. That won't change anything at home or it will even make you hate him more!

I now want to prepare nachos while being taken from behind by a sombrero - wearing darkly brooding man.

No mariachi bands need apply.

A fairly hard avocado 😂

On the topic of nachos I have started making mine with sweet chilli sauce and they are amazeballs

Yasbu, I would give zero guacs if someone touched me whilst mashing an avacardo.

Even if it is a fairly hard avacardo.

Pookie that sounds vile. Please don't say "amazeballs" 🤮

Thank you. My logic is first of all, dont "nick" food when someone is preparing it. I cant explain why but this annoys me. And second of all, stop touching me when I'm trying to mash a fairly hard avocado because....well that's just annoying

Is that purely why you're annoyed? I thought perhaps it was perhaps he left you to do everything whilst he lounged around on his Playstation? In which case, I would be more sympathetic.

Either way, your communication doesn't sound good, OP.

A fairly hard avocado 😂

Has to be a wind up!

Fairly hard avocados are such a passion killer

readingnc You are correct. It should be "totes amazeballs"

I was going to say this thread is driving me mad

But I don't even avocado...

@gwackywacky @MitziK everyone knows that Tuesday is tacos right?

@Butchyrestingface
A combination of things really, mainly because I dont see why I should be fucking around in a kitchen on a Sunday whilst he chills on the PS because otherwise it's a bowl of slightly stale coco pops. And also dont eat whilst I'm still fucking MAKING IT, also dont touch me whilst I'm still making it, it just makes me feel like some kind of sort of sexual maternal figure slave if you get what I mean

You are a acting like he has felt you up while you are manipulating a fuel rod in a nuclear reactor.

Calm down.