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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to report this?

65 replies

Bitweird456 · 12/10/2019 00:10

Chatting to someone on a dating app which has full names. Was able to see he is a primary school teacher.

We were chatting about very light hearted stuff and I asked him a silly “would you rather” question - eg would you rather look like x animal or y animal.

He turned it around and asked if he could ask something weird. I said ok.

His question:
If no one would ever know, would you rather have sex with a 14 year old boy or an old woman?

I have blocked him. I do have his name and his details and I’m tempted to escalate this... I have screen shots.

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 12/10/2019 00:12

That is fucking creepy as fuck. REPORT.

Original poster
Bitweird456 · 12/10/2019 00:13

How do I report?

OP posts:
Halo1234 · 12/10/2019 00:15

It is a bit of a weird thing to say.....but do u know for sure he is who he says he is. Would be a bit silly of a qualified teacher to ask that to someone they hardly know and leave themselves traceable. Could he have gave a false name or be lying about being a teacher?

Original poster
Bitweird456 · 12/10/2019 00:15

No, he didn’t tell me that. I have found him on LinkedIn. It’s definitely him.

OP posts:
Ohthatsfabulousdarling · 12/10/2019 00:15

Yeah I'd report it in a heartbeat.

BanginChoons · 12/10/2019 00:15

County council?

lostelephant · 12/10/2019 00:15

Report. Report. Report.

That is not normal behaviour. Can you google his full name in case he's listed as a teacher on the school's website?

Original poster
Bitweird456 · 12/10/2019 00:16

I’m worried he would be able to trace me...

It is so weird though. Essentially the app has full names, I idly googled and can see his workplace/his social media profiles, everything

OP posts:
SavetheMinden6 · 12/10/2019 00:17

Report him for what exactly?

Haggisfish · 12/10/2019 00:17

I’d report.

Original poster
Bitweird456 · 12/10/2019 00:19

Savetheminden - flag his behaviour to the school? I don’t know. I do know that people who behave disreputable/bring their profession into disrepute can have pretty harsh consequences. And I feel like this is toeing the line. More fool him for having a social media account connected to a dating app and saying such abominable things

OP posts:
Sparklesocks · 12/10/2019 00:36

Jesus fucking Christ

lostelephant · 12/10/2019 00:37

I idly googled and can see his workplace/his social media profiles, everything

Is there an email address for the head teacher? I'd send a strong email and attach screenshots of your messages.

Sparklesocks · 12/10/2019 00:39

Which app is it out of curiosity? I’ve only ever encountered dating apps with first names or nicknames

EugenesAxe · 12/10/2019 00:41

It is weird for anyone to have a thought like that and in a teacher I find it especially worrying. You could contact the MASH of the relevant council, or the Safeguarding Lead at his school - just report what was said and leave them to it.

Advicewel · 12/10/2019 01:04

Or it could be someone pretending to be him, I'd report it anyway.

Original poster
Bitweird456 · 12/10/2019 01:08

Advicewel - I did think that but it was linked to his Instagram account. So what are the chances... unfortunately I don’t have proof of that as have now blocked him

OP posts:
Derbee · 12/10/2019 02:08

I’d report. You may as well if it’s going to protect any children

Original poster
Bitweird456 · 12/10/2019 12:28

I will thanks all

OP posts:
Cordial11 · 12/10/2019 12:36

Ahhh I just worry if it’s not him... someone set me up on a bloody sex website before and gave out my number etc and said godknows what Blush

DogsLeftBollock · 12/10/2019 12:57

Report him for asking a question?
He was asking if YOU would have sex with a 14 year old boy, not him.

Original poster
Bitweird456 · 12/10/2019 13:07

Dogs: are you him?! It’s a weird thing to ask anyone...

Cordial: 99% sure it is. It’s linked to his social media.

OP posts:
Zebraaa · 12/10/2019 13:12

You can report if it’ll make you feel better but I don’t think it’ll go anywhere. It’s not like he’s saying he wants to have sex with a 14 year old boy.

DogsLeftBollock · 12/10/2019 13:17

Not unless I've had a sex change, no @Bitweird456
I just don't see what's reportable with the question, weird or not.

Butchyrestingface · 12/10/2019 13:19

You can report, but what exactly do you think is going to come of it?