To have called in to work when child

[CheeseAndBeans]

Mum of two, youngest is 3 and goes to nursery 3 days a week. I have recently returned to work part time on her nursery days after a few years out so am doubting myself and unsure of what's right....

DD was sick all through the night Saturday night, as per 48 hour rule she couldn't go to nursery yesterday and couldn't get anyone else to have her. She still wasn't right in herself. Called work 1.5 hours before shift was due to start and explained I couldn't come in as had to look after sick child. They were not happy and tried to guilt me into coming in, apologized as nothing I could do but would be in tomorrow as she is on the mend. This morning, she seems ok and no more sick so we all get ready to go, as we walk out the door she throws up! Obviously can't send her again today so had to call work. Again, they made it clear they weren't happy, it's busy today and short staffed as it is. Apologized and explained I couldn't do anything else.

I work in a minimum wage job, 4 hours a day, it's a pain when someone can't come in as others have to pick up the slack and I feel terrible but what can I do?
OH works 12 hour shifts and is much better paid. We would be so much worse off if he didn't go in, my thoughts are we have to put our family income first and so it's me that should take the time off. Neither of us would get paid for the time we didn't work. A friend this morning mentioned she would have shared the days with her OH but they are both in similar paid jobs.

What would you have done? What do others do if their kids are sick? As I said, am new to being a working parent!

Yes, and she can raise a claim against them for automatic unfair dismissal if she thinks she’s been dismissed due to attempting to assert a statutory right.

Employees with less than two years’ service can’t claim ordinary unfair dismissal but they can claim they’ve been unfairly dismissed for an automatically unfair reason or that they’ve been subject to unlawful discrimination, irrespective of their length of service. Not that I’m saying any of this applies to this particular case, but rather just pointing out that your blithe assertion Is not entirely correct.

I can't believe anyone thinks you were unreasonable. Your child always comes first. My employer is shit, always understaffed but I still wouldn't go in if my child was sick.
Giving 1.5 hours notice is okay. In my job an hour's notice is acceptable so maybe it's the same for OP. I don't know about other people but my children always want mummy if they're ill.

Some poster’s attitude show that it is no wonder that employers don’t want to employ females with school age children.

Just spotted the OP is on the minimum wage. How much “respect” do people really think the OP should be giving a job that pays her £32.84 a day? Genuinely interested.

Some poster’s attitude show that it is no wonder that employers don’t want to employ females with school age children.

Well, if such an employer thought their shitty £8.21 an hour job would take any form of priority over my family, I doubt I’d want to work for them anyway!

Some of the replies on here are weird! No way would I be working if my DS was ill, I’d WANT to be with him to look after him. Work would never in a million years take priority over my son!

I am sorry to say but as you have an unsupportive employer I would also lie and say you are sick. Don’t feel guilty for staying at home, your little girl needs you.

I was in the same position (part-time work) and my employer got very annoyed and tried not to pay me so i used my sick days. Thankfully I have a much better employer now who fully supports working parents.

Agreed @bluemoon1103. This falls into the “only on mumsnet” category where someone is expected to treat a very part time, minimum wage, presumably not hugely skilled job with the same degree of respect as if they were a senior partner in a law firm on 6 figures. Madness.

I’m really lucky with my work too. My bosses run a professional office where we all work hard and do extra when we need to but equally they recognise we have families and a life outside and sometimes we need to prioritise them over work.

Hey

Check out your rights on gov website. You have the right to reasonable time off including taking care of a sick child. Your employer doesnt' have to pay you for this. Some organisations have a carers leave policy whereby you may get 3 days carers leave per year , paid, for example.
Being dismissed or treated unfairly for acting within employment law is discrimination. It's not helpful other posters are suggesting you may be dismissed. As a working mother I have ,on rare occasions, taken the odd day and am lucky to work for an organisation that respect my right to do so and would never make me feel bad for it. I hope your little one is on the mend.

I don't mind giving parental leave in these instances but it is always unpaid.
If the staff member then chooses to make time up or use annual leave to cover absence so it's not unpaid, that is up to them.

You have a statutory right to take time off for an emergency relating to a dependent which would include a child being sick. The right is to a reasonable amount of time to deal with the emergency, so about 1 or 2 days. If you were dismissed for this it would be automatic unfair dismissal regardless if your length of service.

Quite a lot of misunderstanding there.
So - yes time off for dependant is a statutory right but it applies for an emergency situation so first day or 2 at most. After that you should sort something out even if it is not financially sensible (ie babysitter or share with husband). If you always take the time off when child is sick then unfortunately you could be disciplined/sacked esp if under 2yrs as it is not always emergency.
Have said that I understand your situation. Just know you are not fully protected.
As for the PP suggesting to call in sick rather than saying childcare - that makes you even more vulnerable! Silly idea!

You did the right thing IMO.

Your child comes 1st and it doesn't make financial sense for DH to take the time off.

Bottom line: yes it's inconvenient for your work but that's all it is, an inconvenience for 4 hours. That's life when you have children.

If you have been reliable up until now it would be pretty harsh for them to sack you over one incident, but think about how to handle in the future.

It may be financially better short term for you to take the 2nd day off too rather than your dh, but longer term it wont be if you do it too often and lose your job.

We try to share the days off around, usually use our annual leave so we still get paid. We generally each try to hold back 3 or 4 days each for stomach bugs/chickenpox etc etc. It's a bit shit as it means we're short on actual holiday to have fun with, but it's getting us through, and once they've done their first year or so at nursery their immune systems get a lot better which helps too!!

It doesn't sound like you have a great attitude to your job, tbh. It might be a stopgap for you before you go back to your 'real' career but it isn't for your colleagues and managers. I wonder if they pick up on your condescension.

Perhaps it would be better to use this time to undertake study, training, or experience for your intended career.

If all she’s had off is 2 days in 6 months it’s hardly excessive

Plenty of workplaces have people who skive off on the sick at the drop of a hat much more frequently for a “cold” etc. Is it only absence for looking after sick kids people have a problem with?

I had to take a day off work when my DD had a high temp.

I work in her school. The first aider in the school office one morning told me she had a temp and she couldn’t stay in school. Went and told my school business manager and he weren’t happy. I explained what the first aider said and that I had no choice. “Well it’s your responsibility to find child care” I replied that my dad lives 3 hours away and my mum is in the middle of chemo. And I ain’t giving my child to my mum who’s sick and poorly herself. He still didn’t like it. I walked out the office. Annoyed me cos the lady in the office even told him herself that I had to go! I thought my DD school who is also my employer would at least understand. By this point it was my first day off I ever had to take. He then told me the following day that he expected my to find a child minder

Me*

You knew she would't be in the first day because of the 48 hour rule so why didn't you call in before 1.5 hours before your shift so they had a chance to arrange cover?

You aren't being unreasonable to stay off to look after DC but you really should be giving as much notice as you can.

their shitty £8.21 an hour job

57Varieties Wow. How nasty. What a judgemental snob you are. Just because a job pays minimum wage doesn’t mean it’s “shitty”.

This falls into the “only on mumsnet” category where someone is expected to treat a very part time, minimum wage, presumably not hugely skilled job with the same degree of respect as if they were a senior partner in a law firm on 6 figures. Madness.

So just because you don’t work full time, or are paid more than minimum wage, that gives you the right to treat your managers and colleagues however you want? You don’t need to respect them, treat them fairly, give them sufficient notice when possible?

You should be ashamed of such an awful attitude.

Did you even consider offering to go in on a day you don’t typically work so that a person covered no your shift would get a day back?

Oh whatever, @heartsonacake. Call me a snob if you like, I really don’t care but if all my employer thought I was worth was £8.21 an hour I’d feel I owed them a lot less “respect” than if I earned twice that. You call me a snob, I think bowing and scraping and expecting to doff your cap to a job with crap wages makes you a mug.

So just because you don’t work full time, or are paid more than minimum wage, that gives you the right to treat your managers and colleagues however you want?

No, but expecting someone to tie themselves in knots trying to find childcare, put themselves in financial hardship by foregoing the husband’s salary instead of hers, for the sake of a job that pays pennies is nuts. If I put myself out for work it’s because, one way or another, it’s worth it to do so. As I said, most employers would replace most staff in the blink of an eye without caring if they dropped dead. It’s only work, giving it its proper place in your life is not an “awful attitude”. Nice deflection from your lack of employment law knowledge though!