My friend thinks my husband should divorce me

[AintNobodyHereButUsChickens]

... For doing this to a block of cheese For some reason my DH gets really wound up when people (usually DD) grate the cheese from the 'wrong' end (ie, an end that isn't already grated). Earlier, I was grating cheese for tea and I had a lightbulb moment and grated every possible end, edge, side, corner and angle on the block of cheese

My friend is horrified and thinks DH should divorce me for so much wrongness

Obviously lighthearted

Cheese mmm

Now, those blocks you get for £2.50 on offer in the supermarkets...they open along the long end which is wrong as you grate it along the short end which means you have to take the whole block out.

If the opening was on the short end you could just squeeze it out

Only acceptable to do on April Fools Day.

Now you can expect the toilet seat to be left up....

You’re an animal.

This is as bad as my dh deliberately putting the chopping boards back wrong even though they are a set and have tabs that line up. I just can't cope with it so he does it every time

Put it on a the top of a concrete pedestal, call it gr8 and make vague comments about consumerism.

Nobody would even notice this in my house.

A 3 year old DS once had a very long and very expressive tantrum because I hadn't and indeed couldn't give him "curly cheese" for lunch.

Curly cheese, it turns out, is a slice cut with a knife, from a block of cheese that has previously been grated. He would have loved this block of cheese

This is fucking brilliant. Will be doing this at some point this week.

I hate that someone’s hands have grabbed the whole block to grate cheese. I always slice off a section and grate that.

I would divorce whoever bought gross, dyed orange red Leicester.

Show him this video, your cheese destroying behaviour pales by comparison
m.youtube.com/watch?v=gPKkJFvJVrg

Why the fuck would you do that?

You are completely unreasonable OP.
I can’t unsee that. It’s going to haunt me forever.

Who doesn't cut a wedge off and slice the wedge? Who grates the whole block? Or am I weird?

*grate the wedge!

I grate the block.

It's shit cheese.

A block of horror.

😵 Just bleached my eyeballs!

Yabvvvu. If dp did that to cheese, I wouldn't divorce him, it would be too quick.
I'd eat hide all the cheese in the house and leave him nasty mild cheddar, cheese strings and economy cheese slices.

Dc once made pizza with dp vaguely supervising to make sure nothing dangerous happened with the oven/ knives etc. Dd took the 'be careful' to extremes, and grated a large block along one of the large square sides.

Why did you do this? Now my eyes can't unsee it and I'll be having horrible dreams about the contents of your fridge!

I know one family who don't gentle scrape the knife along the top of their margarine, they kind of dig their knives vertically and swirl it around completely destroying the nice even surface. My dc are in awe of this family and their anarchist ways

The bite marks out of that cheese!

Gaviscon - that's superb!

I grate the block if it’s not too difficult to hold. I try to keep it in the packet , but if I don’t I ‘touch the cheese’ but given I’m cooking I touch the food. My hands are clean - no one has died yet and compared to restaurant chefs it’s nothing!

It’s the one thing I hate about eating out - how much your food is touched before you get it 🤮

But at home -?!

I’d divorce you for the state if that, if it was cheddar, but RL is awful
Anyway so 🤷🏻‍♀️

Strangely I don’t mind that, and I’m famously uptight. As a pp said it looks quite artistic, like what Rachel Whiteread would do with cheese.

Monster! If I saw cheese like this, I’d have to cut all the edges to make them smooth and proper. Then I’d probably eat all the chopped off bits.

I bet that'll really grate on him.