Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU, is this Mumsnet all over?

208 replies

Hadjab · 30/09/2019 22:22

Seen on Facebook

“Mom A: “My house is on fire and my child is inside screaming. What do I do?! Picture for attention!"

Mom B: “Try changing his diet. We cut out everything except kale and it’s done wonders for our kids.”

Mom C: “Essential oils. Unrelated: I sell them.”

Mom D: “He’s fine. Helicopter moms ugh. I didn’t even use a car seat when I was a kid and I’m fine! 🙄”

Mom E: “He’s NOT FINE. My friend’s sister’s 2nd cousin had this happen and it was cancer. Google it!”

Mom F: “I’m a realtor and I’d love to help you find a new home!”

Mom G: “SAVE YOUR CHILD WHY ARE YOU ASKING STRANGERS ON THE INTERNET?!”

Mom H: “Rude ^ Have you tried separating the child from the fire?

Mom I: "Squirt some breastmilk on your child. Breastmilk cures everything"

Mom J: "Since there's so many ppl commenting here, can you tell me if this preg test is positive?! I'm only 2 days post ovulation but my boobs are sore and I'm nauseous"

Mom K: "I think there’s more to the story that you aren’t telling us. Please tell us your story from when you were born till now so we can evaluate your life and show you where you went wrong”

Mom L: “has he had his fire vaccinations yet? That will herd immunity protect him from the flames.”

Mom M: “I wish death upon you!^ How dare you believe in science and expose your child to heavy metals, autism, and ignorance by suggesting fire vaccinations!! Have you not seen Vaxxed?”

Mom N: just put some coconut oil on it!

Mom O: just latch him on demand to increase supply, lots of skin to skin.

Mom P: have you considered CIO? We tried it during the last fire and he only cried for 10 minutes. Hasn’t complained since.

Mom Q: I would NEVER let my child CIO. He is 16 years old and has never cried his whole life, not even for a minute. We still bed share and he nurses on demand 4-5 times a night.

Mom R: Did you have him evaluated for lip/tongue ties? I had my LO's revised last week and it has made a huge difference in his screaming.

Mom S: Is he formula fed? The formula companies don't want you to know that formula causes house fires. They work with the insurance companies, so it's really your fault that the house is on fire and he's screaming. I would NEVER feed that poison to my child.

Mom T: sometimes when you’re feeling overwhelmed just walk away. Come back when you’ve had a chance to breathe.

Mom U: Strip him down to just diaper. He's probably too warm! If his rectal temp is 100.4 he needs to go to the ER immediately!

Mom V: “Are you looking for a work from home option? Maybe if you were home with your child more you could’ve prevented the fire. Sending PM”

Mom W: Don't listen to any of this! Follow your mom gut! You're a great mom!

Mom X: let go and let God

Mom Y: don't stress. When he gets too hot, he'll come out on his own.

Mom Z: Girl use this alone time to get your hair done or go on a date night!“

OP posts:
LaMarschallin · 01/10/2019 00:28

Bloody hell!

There's a socking great fire engine parked in such a way as to nearly partially occlude the entrance to the supermarket carpark where the parent and child spaces are!

I'm going to ask those people who are holding that sheet and shouting "Jump, DC, jump!" by that bonfire* for a pen and paper so I can do a diagram.

*Fucking hell! Bonfire night gets earlier and earlier. Hope the fireworks don't disturb DDDdog Angry

Sear86 · 01/10/2019 00:29

GrinGrin this thread has made me chuckle. Brilliant!

Everafter1 · 01/10/2019 00:31

He's gaslighting you, go NC

PaneerOfEvil · 01/10/2019 00:35

You should have built up your child’s resistance to fire. Like the woman who takes ice baths.

inesj · 01/10/2019 00:39

Clearly this is a direct result of your insistence on stockpiling for Brexit - how do you feel about the loo paper now, hmm?

MrsToddsShortcut · 01/10/2019 00:40

Before you put the fire out, have you checked the attic? Here's probably someone living up there. It's more common than you think.

Pieceofpurplesky · 01/10/2019 00:45

Make sure you grab the paperwork for the super selective school - what would the neighbours think of he went to the failing comp

TheLittleDogLaughed · 01/10/2019 00:51

Take his phone off him and ban him from all screentime until he puts that fire out with his bare hands. That’s what we’d have done in my day. Kids today are just so entitled

BringMeAGinandTonic · 01/10/2019 00:55

@MolyHolyGuacamole LOL

This is totally MN.

ChevalierTialys · 01/10/2019 00:59

Clearly the answer is Leave the Bastard...

and also, have you tried hiring a cleaner?

Not to mention, you should cancel the cheque!

kateandme · 01/10/2019 01:09

no you dont have a fire problem.you have a dp problem

Gingerkittykat · 01/10/2019 01:24

It's not a race to the bottom you know.

I hope you don't expect the council to rehouse you, there are people out there who deserve those resources more than you.

Homemadearmy · 01/10/2019 01:51

Mom Q: I would NEVER let my child CIO. He is 16 years old and has never cried his whole life, not even for a minute. We still bed share and he nurses on demand 4-5 times a night.

16 years? Shouldn't it be 192 months

Sux2buthen · 01/10/2019 02:08

Husbands been saving money secretly?
LTB
You can use your secret leaving fund

Rachelover60 · 01/10/2019 02:09

Employ a cleaner.

Rachelover60 · 01/10/2019 02:11

Stop saying: wouldn't of, bored of (?didn'tof)
Do not start a sentence with 'So'.

Rachelover60 · 01/10/2019 02:11

The Queen is nice.

Rachelover60 · 01/10/2019 02:11

How to reproduce by binary fission.

Rachelover60 · 01/10/2019 02:11

Many rude words.

ClaudiaSchiffersUglySister · 01/10/2019 02:13

Didn’t want to read and run, but you sound like hard work.

You sound like the sort who would complain if your house was swept away in a flood.

Your sense of entitlement is astonishing.

My kids work down the mines. Some of them have died. Hasn’t done them any harm. Tell your son to man up.

JaimeBronde · 01/10/2019 02:15

You need financial independence especially if you split from your DH/DP. So stop being a SAHM & look for work. Have you thought about getting a job with the fire brigade? You'd have got a free smoke alarm fitted & possibly a company fire engine carbthis would have prevented the fire from happening in the first place.

What's the point of having kids if you are at work all day & you only see them for an hour in the evening before bedtime? If you were a SAHM & didn't have to rely on childcare then the fire wouldn't have started in the first place.

You can't use the fire as an excuse to take parental leave as that's taking the piss. You should get emergency childcare, call a nanny agency. Your employer won't take kindly to you taking time off to look after your sick child. How do you think other working parents cope when fires happen?

(Also apologies & sincere condolences to anyone who's experienced a house fire or fire of any type.)

FaceForRadio1973 · 01/10/2019 02:52

LolaSmiles

I'd heard SHE was evidently a narc because she contributes to the house deposit fund and then probably started the fire

Bloody impossible. Only men can be Narcs.

Pinkarsedfly · 01/10/2019 02:53

Was the fire caused by you leaving the iron on after taking in ironing then going out for a spa day?

windandme · 01/10/2019 02:55

Can't post about husbands hobby though as it's HUGELY outing. Everyone will instantly know who I am.

Pinkarsedfly · 01/10/2019 02:56

And stop judging the fire. What you’ve seen is just a snapshot of its day. It might spend the rest of its time warming the homeless and cooking food for the starving for all you know. Unhoick your judgy pants.

Swipe left for the next trending thread