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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask how you announced your pregnancy to your parents?

134 replies

Crazycactuslady · 29/09/2019 21:31

We're telling my parents we're expecting this weekend. I'll be 9+1, but it's the last time we'll all be together before Christmas as my dad works away a lot and my husband travels for work. This will be their first grandchild, so I would like to make the announcement memorable... But not tacky.

OP posts:
FluffyEarMuffs · 29/09/2019 22:02

To add to my view that this is "naff".
It's also risky.

Pregnancies don't always work out.
Much better a simple telling in the hope of happy news later on than the memories of unworn babygrows because the baby didn't make it.

You do not want to be remembering your baby reveal in those circumstances.

Just tell the people you want to tell. Rely on them to be thrilled for you and also have your back and support you if it goes wrong.

Aaarrgghhh · 29/09/2019 22:04

Literally just said hey, I’m pregnant.

hammeringinmyhead · 29/09/2019 22:04

You made your view quite clear already, thanks.

Dyrne · 29/09/2019 22:06

... just waiting for what the next post will be in the bizarre MN competitive stakes - “Oh, DS is 17 now, we still haven’t told them, why should we be so gauche as to announce that we had sex once 17 years and 9 months ago?”

hammeringinmyhead · 29/09/2019 22:07

This is exactly like:

OP: How did your partner propose?
Poster 1: on top of the Eiffel Tower!
Poster 2: No horrible tacky Eiffel Tower proposal for us, he asked me when I was in the bath.

Icecreamsoda99 · 29/09/2019 22:07

@QueenWhatevraWanabi thank you! Smile

Dyrne · 29/09/2019 22:07

And how the fuck is showing them a fucking Scan photo “naff?”

Jesus Christ. Just let women enjoy things, for fucks sake.

Daffodil2018 · 29/09/2019 22:09

I told my parents while we were out for a walk - waited until we got to a bench at the top of the hill and told them there. They were so happy! It was a wonderful moment that I will always treasure.

There are some lovely creative ideas on this thread Smile

Crunchymum · 29/09/2019 22:11

Very boring but I just told my parents. No big fuss.

With DC1, DP left my 12w scan picture on his parents fridge door but it didn't have my name on it (was a trimmed photocopy). DP is one of six, so it took a few days for them to suss out who was actually pregnant they were very grateful it wasn't their youngest who was quite young!!

ineedanotherholiday · 29/09/2019 22:13

@FluffyEarMuffs appreciate your point but after 3 miscarriages, making it a bit special was something I wanted to do as I'd never got to before.

If something were to happen I'd be devastated regardless of how I announced it babygro or 'naff' card or not.

mogtheexcellent · 29/09/2019 22:13

Vomited over my MILs carpet.Blush

So then i had to make an emergency call to my parents...

hiddenworlds · 29/09/2019 22:13

annouce

Its not the second coming of Christ

just tell them

User7429001 · 29/09/2019 22:16

I gave my Mum a knitting pattern

Maseandmum · 29/09/2019 22:17

We told them on NYE, we showed them our scan and told them that next year they would be grandparents

FuckOffBoris · 29/09/2019 22:18

Having coffee with my mum. She asked if we wanted to buy her old car (an estate), and I said that would be great as we would be needing room for a pram.

Peccary · 29/09/2019 22:18

I had my scan on Christmas eve, we hadn't told anyone yet. I gave my parents one of those ladybird books "how it works..the grandparent " as one of their gifts. It took them a minute, I think they had given up on ever being grandparents as I was 38!

YaySeptember · 29/09/2019 22:21

We just told them. There was no great fanfare or tricks or big announcement but we're not like that as a family. We just said, as part of a wider conversation, "Oh yea, I'm pregnant btw. S/he's due in [insert month]." They were surprised and happy for us and said congratulations etc but there was no big, excited squeal and cuddle. I would've hated that!

For our 2nd child we happened to run into my sister and dad in the hospital car park after I'd had a scan so I just told them there and then. Again, they were surprised and happy but not all squealey and jumping for joy.

RubaDubMum89 · 29/09/2019 22:21

I just rang my gran and my step mum. Gran waffled on for ages so I had to blurt it out and it was the second thing I said to SM after hello 😊. Step mum was thrilled, gran was cynical.

midnightmisssuki · 29/09/2019 22:22

I would tell them to their face if possible? For me it was impossible (live in different continents) so FaceTime. If I could - I would do it face to face.

Msfoxy17 · 29/09/2019 22:22

I was staying over at my mum's and as she was in the kitchen, I said loudly from the room next door that I had something to tell her. Her jaw practically dropped to the floor when I told her. She didn't think I was ever going to have a child so she was totally surprised,and delighted. It was one of the nicest ever moments I've had with her as an adult and I really treasure the memory. I agree with other posters that you don't really need to embellish in any way, but certainly do if you feel inclined. I think a scan pic is nice if you can wait till that point..but nicer to show in person if that's possible. Or maybe over facetime if not. I think it's lovely to be able to physically see the reaction.

dobedobedobedoo · 29/09/2019 22:33

Had been casually seeing the dad for a couple of months. DM is super religious and thought I was a virgin. I was mid 30’s with my own house, well paid job and absolutely desperate to become a mum. Phoned her on Easter Sunday.
Me: mum, I’m pregnant
Mum: PARDON?
Me: you heard.

We are married now with 2dc. It’s been quite a journey.

FluffyEarMuffs · 29/09/2019 22:34

@ineedanotherholiday I hope everything works out for you. Truly.

This is Aibu so I, as I expect most people are more robust with their replies and I apologise that mine touched a nerve with you.

My view is coming from a place of personal pain as 9+1 is very early and bad stuff happens, even right up to birth. But a first trimester announcement that projects a baby as a reality touches my nerve.

Soontobe60 · 29/09/2019 22:35

From a mothers point of view, when your daughter tells you she isn't pregnant, it is very emotional, or at least for me it was. I didn't think she was going to have children (because that's what she told us), so when she was handing out her gifts at Christmas and gave me a little gift bag with a scan photo inside I was so delighted! And no, surprising your parents about your pregnancy is not naff (unlike 'gender reveal' parties 🤣)

GlitterSparkle85 · 29/09/2019 22:47

First time round I'd made this small jars with a guess what tag on it to reveal inside we're pregnant!
Second time round I ordered some jigsaw that had We're pregnant on it cant remember where I got them from tho? I think its exciting way to tell them and Grandparents love a keepsake!

intermittentfasting · 29/09/2019 22:50

It's really cheesy but I typed up a mock grandparents job offer with the starting date my due date and put the scan picture in.
It made my mil cry Grin