To think people don’t want to be sociable?

[hotpinkice]

AIBU to think most people just won’t come on nights out? Realistically, this is a young persons thing isn’t it?

Also wondering what "nights out" mean.

Ny sister is late 40s and still goes to nightclubs but I always had problems with crowds so stopped going in early 30s.

I didn't used to mind the odd night out every now and then but now I'd rather not if you don't mind thank you very much.

Local pub (where I know loads of people) putting the world to rights with a glass or three of wine, something from the menu and a 15 minute walk home. In bed by 10. That's the only sociable night out that appeals.

I'm 28.

I was actually invited to a birthday party tonight for a very close friend. I declined the party invite but met up with her an hour and a half before the party started.

I was back in bed by 8.30pm. I'm sensitive to being overwhelmed. I don't like dealing with people I don't know and having to make small talk and I would have just felt uncomfortable.

Also nightclubs were never my scene. I've gone three times and have actually fallen asleep twice once on a sofa and another sitting down near the stage whilst my friends danced on. (they were still keeping an eye on me.)

I agree with pp that it depends what you mean by a night out?

Night out done the pub? Or staying at a restaurant for the evening with drinks? Sure. Going clubbing? I would really have to be in the mood and not something I would do more than once or twice a year.

@hotpinkice

I used to love nights out/pub crawls/hen nights in cocktail bars, and clubbing til 3am. They were happy, heady, carefree, wonderful days, full of laughter, drinking, kissing men I had never met before and never saw again, dancing, and late night partying, and I had dozens of different friends...

We would sometimes go to Blackpool or Brighton or London for the day, (on a coach trip,) and come back on the coach, tipsy and giggly, singing and cheering on the way back, and rolling into our bed at 2am... I went to multiple social club parties from work, loads of hen nights, and lots of pub crawls, and loads of engagement parties and weddings (including the night parties...)

But that was between the age of 16 and 28-ish. I am middle aged now.

I do like a nice pub lunch, and a trip to the cinema or theatre, but don't like going out after 3pm now. I like to be back home by 5 or 6pm... So I will often to to an early cinema showing or a matinee theatre showing... And like many others on here, I prefer staying in with a takeaway, a good film, and a jigsaw or an hour on a video game... (wrapped up in a snuggly jumper, and huddled up with DH!)

I went to a works Christmas meal/after-party, last December, and the table was booked for 8.30pm! The starter came at 9pm, and the main at 9.45pm. Then the dessert at 10.30pm. Then the after-party started at 11pm and went on til 1.30am!

Sorry, but my idea of a good night is NOT waiting til almost 10 at night for a main meal, and then dancing and drinking (with all the food in my belly) for 2 to 3 hours after! And then paying £25 for a taxi home! The whole night cost me £100 with the taxi, the drinks, and the meal. And I didn't even enjoy it that much, because it was too late and I was tired.

Also, going out in the late evening, I feel like I am waiting all day to go out. I never used to feel like this, but since I hit my 30s I have.

As I say, I like a pub lunch, or a cooked breakfast at a cafe/restaurant and a catch-up (with a friend or with DH or one of my DC,), or a theatre or cinema trip, or a long walk, or a day trip to the beach, or a fun activity... But nights out on a regular basis??? Nope. Not for 20 years - since my late 20s. Been there done that. Bought the T-shirt. I enjoyed it very much at the time, but those years are behind me, and there they'll stay. I enjoy different things now, at different times of the day!

I think it just depends on your personality rather than age. I'm 29 so I guess I'm still a youngster! I'm an extrovert and love being with people, I will jump at the chance of a night out whether it's just a meal and a couple of drinks or out until 3am clubbing.

I have a friend who is 22 and has only been to a nightclub twice in her life, she doesn't like going out and would rather be at home. Different people like different things.

A meal and drinks yes, drinks and a club it would very much depend on who was inviting me.
I think it all depends on where people are in life and who the people are; now I have children there’s not much opportunity for me to go out so I’m probably choosier about when I take that chances I do have, for example I’m not that keen on a work night out but if my best friend manages to get a child free night then I’ll find a way.

Nightclubs, definitely not but then never enjoyed very much.
Sociable though, absolutely. We had our village meeting in the church last night. 37 people aged between about 50 and 92.
It started with wine and sausage rolls. A bit of debate about the telephone box, clearing the pond and speeding cyclists then adjourn to one of the houses for more wine, port, cheese and biscuits and ice creams. Bizarre but very sociable for a few hours.

I would love to be sociable and have friends. Unfortunately I don’t have anyone to go out with.

Totally disagree and tbh I find that attitude depressing.

I'm pushing 50 and I love a good night out and actually go a bit crackers if I haven't had a decent one for couple of months.

I don't want to go out anywhere near as often as I used to and I sometime crave a night in with a book/telly. But when I go out I really go out. Hope I will do this into my 80s.

You know what I love? An afternoon out in town - maybe a matinee, wander round a gallery or something, then a few drinks, early dinner and home and back in pjs for 8.30ish. That’s my favourite way of doing ‘out out’ - had just such a day with my sisters and a friend the other week it was great.

I do like a night out now and then but not every week or even every month. I do like being sociable but prefer meeting for lunch or going to a show or something.

I think as you get older your free time just gets carved up. I used to be out every Friday and Saturday but I just don’t have enough free time or energy now! I save nights out for my best friends, anything else I’m just stretching myself too thin. I guess as my kids get older I will get older too and then just be too tired to go out at all. 🤣

I hate nights out. Most people get on my nerves. Prefer to stay in!!!

I went YABU. Im quite I introverted and dislike big going out out nights, but I'm quite happy to socialise and would gladly go for food and a few drinks with friends (and if they go on later than planned then cool).
I'm just over pretending to enjoy the hype and pressure of big nights out.

I had a night out with friends recently in a local pub. It was really nice until the live band started up as we were in a very enclosed space and they had stacks of amplifiers.

I used to be out several nights a week, always the last one standing, often going to work after a only few hours sleep. Now I have kids, a job, housework - I'm exhausted. Once the kids are in bed I just want to collapse and have quiet time. I occasionally have evenings out and never feel like going at all!

Jesus this thread is making my feel like a have Peter Pan syndrome....

I always think I can't be fucked and would rather be at home. When I do go out (mates birthday or something where you have to show up for your friends) I end up being the life and soul of the party and wish I went out more. It's the thought of going out rather than the going out for me. I do love a wedding party though, you get to get really dressed up and dance to cheese all night.

I do also prefer a summer day drinking bender than a night out. You see your mates in the sun, drink to much, laugh too much, have a burger and go home and be asleep by 6/7, sleep through your hangover and don't waste the next day.

Meals out are nice to but only if they're early.

I'm 35 and I still like a night out as long as the company is good, there's food involved and no one expects me to go to a nightclub. But if people don't like nights out that doesn't mean they "don't want to be sociable". Maybe they just prefer other ways of socialising? I also enjoy socialising in the day (meeting for lunch/coffee/afternoon tea) and we often have friends round for a takeaway and a few drinks on the Friday or Saturday evening once the kids are in bed.

No, just me it seems.
I don’t have any “going out clothes”.
I don’t drink alcohol.
I don’t like most people.
I am following a plant based vegan diet.

I am basically everyone’s living social nightmare.

I have a very carefully collected group of friends who I have been friends with for 20 years plus.
They are similar, we go for tea at Wetherspoons, cheep, jeans, quick and zero fuss. Home by 9pm. Lovely,

I live in a rural location so if we want a night out I either have to drive or we take a taxi to the nearest town (10 miles away) so we don't bother unless it's for something special. We go away for weekends every 2-3 months so have nights out then.

I absolutely love the idea of a night out but I'm pretty ambivalent about the reality of it. If a night out is planned I'm into the idea but as it approaches and I realise that the night out means giving up on being in bed watching netflix by 10pm and feeling reasonably rested the next morning then I start dreading it. My life is tiring and early nights with tv and skating are the things that keep me going when I'm tired. So losing those for a night out doesn't seem worth it. I'll probably enjoy myself when I do go out but often not as much as I would have enjoyed a chilled out early night.

When I was at uni it was three to four nights out a week. Did it so much and the. When I started a career it was the pub every night after work. Now I like staying in and I think my liver does too!