To ignore Lush staff member to her face?

[OrangeMangoSmoothie]

I love Lush, unfortunately as anyone who's ever been knows, the staff can be a bit overwhelming. Grabbing your arms to rub products on, pouncing the second you're through the door, etc.

And as much as i love Lush, i'm also autistic and really bad with people and communication. I normally order online but if something is new i'd prefer to smell it first.

I went in today to browse the new halloween range and had very obvious headphones on with my back to staff. I kinda thought this would deter them but one popped up in front of my face (literally) as if to mouth something to me and gestured to the products.

Sometimes things like that happen, for example on public transport, or if im in someone's way and i can potentially take off my headphones and say sorry/no/excuse me. But i panicked because of how insanely close she was and recoiled then turned and moved. She then followed me a little bit (i had my head facing down) and she bent over to ask again, i think she said "can i help you with anything" but i still had noise cancelling headphones and music playing. I kept my head down and meandered a little then darted out the door.

I know on reflection that this was a bit rude on my part and i feel bad now for not answering but i wasn't capable. Was she BU to continue trying to get my attention? It felt like overkill and very intrusive. Im not sure if im overreacting because i need the space. Im used to people realising i "cant hear" them and leaving me be.

Im too embarrassed to wear anything like a badge saying i'm disabled and it would probably attract staff to want to "help" me more if i did. Does anyone have any advice on how to seem less rude when im not able to speak? Did this lady take it too far?

She definitely overstepped the mark there but it's possibly a training/awareness issue rather than actual rudeness.
If I were you and I ever went into their shop again I would simply say - wearing my best 'Don't fuck with me' face - "No thank you. I will let you know if I need any help" and see if that does the trick.

Oh dear, you poor thing. It sounds as though she’s very bad at reading body language! I think she did take it too far.

I don’t know how to advise on tactics for discouraging that sort of interaction that you weren’t already doing (headphones etc). I hope someone has some good ideas for you.

That’s really tough - she clearly isn’t very good at reading clear “leave me alone” signals.

Would you feel up to dropping HQ a line explaining what happened? It might help any diversity/customer service training they if they could recognise invisible differences more easily and understand not all customers like to be approached and some physically can’t deal with it at all.

She was rude way before you retreated.

I'd maybe tweet Lush. They need to train their staff to recognise when people don't want to be bothered.

You were a little bit rude but it was born out of discomfort and panic. The shop assistant was far ruder. You'd made it pretty obvious that you didn't want to engage and she shouldn't have persisted.

I've got a hidden disability sunflower lanyard which I use at Gatwick Airport, but I don't think they're widely recognised at the moment.

I'd describe her as rude not you.

Stories like that are one of the reasons I avoid Lush.

It’s not her fault - Lush treat their staff like shit. They get a bollocking if they don’t leap on customers as soon as they come through the door. They actually have targets of getting a product onto the customer within X amount of time and are hauled over the coals if they don’t meet said target.

One of many reasons I don’t support them.

Yanbu. When I worked there we had the odd colleague like that. They pissed off customers and annoyed the hell out of me.
It's probably still because of their Mystery Shopper reports, who the sensible staff could spot a mile off anyway.

No point tweeting Lush. They train their staff to be overly familiar and to push their way into conversation with you.

I had my headphones on in the hope it would mean they would leave me alone and yet still a staff member came out of nowhere and shoved a soap under my nose. Only it caught me by surprise and I knocked it out her hand cos it felt like I was being attacked.

‘Can I help you?’

‘No thank you’

End of problem.

This is why I avoid Lush - it’s just too much

It’s not the staff’s fault but an upper management thing.

@Funghi you may have missed the bit where the OP says they’re autistic? Not as straightforward for everyone.

No I don't think you were rude. She should have noticed from your discomfort at the first encounter. She chose to pursue you. She was the rude one.

I do feel bad for Lush workers though. They have to be like that or they can be disciplined and it can be difficult to always get social situations right.

The ones in mine are lovely. I will stop for a chat if I want to. Otherwise, head up and shoulders back "no, thank you!" and they back off. There used to be a try-too-hard agressive one in there but we noticed that she didn't last long.

I was going to suggest the sunflower lanyard. here
Maybe tweet Lush and show them the link?

'I'm fine thanks'

'No thank you'

'Just browsing'

I like lush. I like that they know their products and can answer questions, provide advice etc. I don't think it's a problem to say something like the above when I don't want to engage.

I avoid going into LUSH because I find the staff too much so you are braver than me!

You were pretty clear with your body language and she should have respected that and given you space.

You did nothing wrong at all.

You were not rude, she was.
I am not autistic, I am only stating this to let you know that non autistic people also find this very annoying.
I was at a shopping center today and they have a weekly Purple Day.
This is a quieter day to make shopping easier for people who need it.

Are management bastards to staff now? I worked there about 12 years ago and absolutely loved it and all the people I worked with were genuinely awesome people. That’s really disappointing if they’ve gone all corporate. The thing that I hate in Lush is when you buy something and they coo over it saying ‘ooh, what a good choice, I’ve been eyeing that up myself’ etc. I’m sure they’re told they have to say but I always wonder what the point is, considering I’m already buying it so it doesn’t need any more selling.

OP you weren’t rude at all. It’s well known that headphones on means you want to be left alone. You should tweet/ email them though to let them know about it. It’s all very well having policies and targets for staff but it needs to be flexible or they just piss people off.

Tricky, and she definitely went too far!
Perhaps you could say "just browsing" with a smile and then very obviously turn the other way? You wouldn't need to take your headphones off for that as you can pretty much assume what they're going to be saying if they're jumping on you when you walk in.

I wish the lush staff would back the fuck up and stop touching me, frankly. I physically recoiled from abrasive hand grabbing last time.

Do you think having a stock phase that you just repeat would help?

I'm not autistic but if someone tries to bother me my response is always "No thank you", if they bother me again "No thank you", if they try to engage me in conversation "No thank you". I don't have to think about my response because it is always "No thank you". They soon realise they aren't getting anywhere with you when all you say is "No thank you"!

I don't need to worry about what to say or whether I'm rude, or about what is it they are trying to sell me. Do I want to engage? No thank you.

When I go into my local lush, I can’t even get anyone to look at me! It’s never busy either, considering I live in a busy, touristy town!

Upanddownandroundagain I didn’t, thanks. Autism doesn’t prevent someone from having a stock response for such a situation. I’m well aware of this.

Last time I was in Lush, 3 staff members did that thing within literally a 5 minute period. I'd wave one away with a smile and along came another. They weren't noticing who their colleagues were bombarding cos they were themselves busy bombarding other people.

I said to the last guy "3 people in 5 mins, it's too much sorry" and turned to leave. In fairness he did apologise and looked a bit abashed.

But I've never been back. Can't bear that kind of hard selling. They're always tiny shops too - it's not like you can escape!