Would you have children again?

[SherbetSaucer]

So this isn’t a ‘do you regret having children’ thread or an ‘if you could have your time again would you still have them’ thread but I was thinking...

Hypothetically, say you knew you were guaranteed to come back again in another life after you die, knowing what you know now would you have children in that second life (you wouldn’t get the children you currently have)?

If yes why and if no what would you concentrate on instead?

AIBU to assume a lot of parents would make the decision to experience a childfree life the second time around?

Absolutely! I love my children and having children has given me meaning and purpose in this otherwise strange world in which we live! I just couldn't imagine a life with no children in it ...

No. I’d want to be totally selfish and live my life for me!! I had my first dc when I was a teenager and although I wouldn’t change anything now (I have 3) because my life is enjoyable, it’s hard in so many ways.
So much of my life is based on worrying about them!! I love and adore the bones of them all but as a parent my headspace is pretty much taken over by worrying. Not inna frantic overbearing way towards them by the way, more a “lie in bed at night worrying about their relationships, their future, the state of the planet we’ve left them” type worries. I just never seem to switch off.
I’d like to have another go when I don’t have to think constantly about them in the back of my mind.
I’d work and holiday on a constant rotation

I've never understood why any woman having a child would willingly undergo such an experience again.

Would I know in the next life everything about this life? And would I know I have another life after that?

In a case where you basically know you are immortal I can see using the space of a lifetime to get to know yourself and travel without kids. I think I would probably still have them most of the time though. More laughter with kids.

Yes I would. The only thing I would do differently is have more.

I would absolutely have a child again but I'd do a bit more being a wild young thing first.

I had ds at 22, I'd have preferred late 20s early 30s.

He has improved my life immeasurably though. Not just because I love him to bits but because having him made me pull my head out of my arse and get my shit together which I seriously needed to do but had no motivation to actually do it.

Hmm..I dont know. Probably not. In fact, if I could come back with the memory of this life, I'd rather not as it wouldn't feel right. Like my new kids wouldn't be my first kids.

Plus I'd really like to see what I would have become without the albeit wonderful burden of a family.

I would absolutely stay childfree!! I'm not too fussed with my two beautiful perfect pain in the arses 😂 (only joking, I'm practically obsessed with them)! I'm currently sat at a children's disco and if I didn't have children I would be doing adult only holidays forever 😂

Absolutely. I find DS so delightful and it gets better and better at the moment.

In a heartbeat.

Mine are all grown up now and they make me proud every day. I can't wait for grandchildren.

No. My mum made it look so easy. I didn't know how hard it was. Dh & I would be holidaying round the Caribbean, Cuba, Dominican Republic!

I'd have one and I'd have the baby in my early 30's.

Yes definitely! I love being a mum.

Yes but then I'm an older mother so don't have the regrets of not living in my 20s and early 30s.

I love my children. Best thing in my life/best thing I've ever done. They make me so proud.

No I wouldn't have children.

I think that's quite profound.

It's an interesting question. I'd want a shot at a completely different type of life, career etc, so maybe not just to experience the difference fully.

I would have had more.

Yes definitely. I would probably had them sooner and more of them

Definitely, but only two max and later in life to reduce the environmental impact.

Yes, despite a never healing post-forceps delivery, I wouldn't be without her. She's an only as I'm still in severe pain 6 years on, but I genuinely think there's nothing like it

Yes but I would adopt m. I still hope to do this one day if circumstances allow me when my own children are a lot older

I kind of see motherhood as potentially two different experiences depending on your circumstances...

Either children are an addition to your life or they are your life.

For me, it's the latter...hence why I might not do it again. I feel like I've missed out on a lot.

Yes!! 100% I'd start earlier too - had my first at 30 and now want loads!

I’m an accidental parent, SS dropped my then nephew off and promised it would only be for a few weeks and he would be able to go back. Two and a half years later is still here and now a son.

I do have moments where I think I would give him back if it wouldn’t screw him up, but those moments aren’t as common now.

However if I was taken back to day one I genuinely don’t know what I would do. I imagine I would say no thank you. Which looking back would have been the best thing as then he would have probably gone on to have a proper family, rather than just me.

No. Definitely not.

I would choose a different father. One that wanted to be a dad and wasn't always so reluctant to get involved.